transcript

Speaker 1:
[00:00] Before we get into today's podcast, I want to tell you something super quick. No BS Weightloss is opening again very soon. And right now, I've got a waitlist for you to get on if you do not want to miss your opportunity. And I mean, get on the list, because women wait for months just to be able to join us. So if you've been listening to the podcast, nodding your head and thinking, Jesus, this is exactly what I need to be doing, then get on the waitlist. If you will go to www.nobsweightloss.com/waitlist, that is exactly where you can join. All right, onto the show. All right, welcome back. So last week, we talked a lot about why diets typically fail and how you're not the one really failing the diet, but we looked at where's the diet's responsibility and all this and what is it that they are and are not teaching us that leaves us unable to do them? And this week, what we want to do is I want to talk to you about what actually works when it comes to losing weight. So one of the most important things that you have to understand is this. If your diet is not going to work in your real fucking life with all the things that you got going on for you, then it's just not going to work. Period. I want to say this again because I think it's so important. If your diet is not going to work in your actual real life with all the things that go on for you, then it's just not going to work. It just can't. So let's just be honest about your life for a second. Let's say that you're someone who gets stressed out really easily. Or maybe you are a people pleaser. Maybe you're someone who has a really busy schedule. You've got kids in multiple sports. Maybe you're a woman who has just a lot of demands in your life. Maybe you've got a really demanding job. Or maybe you're retired and you are someone who has a lot of time on your hands. And you're not used to having a lot of time on your hands. And for some of my women, they're caught in the sandwich generation, where they are still taking care of kids. Now they're taking care of their parents. So they feel like they're taking care of everyone. So basically, you don't have a calm and quiet life all the time. And what I find is that most women are picking diets that only work when life is calm and quiet. They picked very strict diets, very rigid ones. And basically, they're just picking shit that's never going to work in their real life. And that's a problem. Because if you want to lose weight, the one thing that has to be true is whatever diet plan you pick, it must work in your life. You shouldn't have to change your life to lose weight. You should be able to lose weight with your life the way it is. So it's got to work when you travel. It has to work with last minute dinner invites. It's got to work on really stressful days. It has to work on nights when you're butt ass tired. It has to work on the days you don't want to cook. It has to work on the days when you're like, I'm not doing this. I'm just going to order food out. It has to work when you're bored. It has to work when you're under a lot of pressure. It has to work when you're out of your routine and you feel discombobulated. Like it's got to work through all of that. Because if it doesn't, guess what? You can't follow it. How are you supposed to follow something that wasn't engineered to work through all that? And then what I see happens is you will tell yourself, well, I need to lose weight and I really want to, but I just need to wait until the right time. I hear this bullshit every damn day. Now it's just not a good time, Corinne. Well, I need to wait until things calm down. It's just not the right time for me. And then guess what? You also say, I just can't do it right now. When this is over, when this week is done, when things slow down, then I'll be able to. It's like you are always kicking the can down the road. There's always something coming up. It's going to be your king ding dong excuse to not get started. And it's thing after thing after thing. And you just keep waiting for this magical moment where everything in the world perfectly aligns so that you can now do your strict hard ass rigid diet that doesn't fit with a normal life. Like there's going to be a day when you wake up and you're just highly motivated, super ready and the world has cooperated and made your life line up in such a way that you can do this easily. It's almost like we have this version of our life in our head where there's it's coming. There's going to be a day where there's nothing stressful, nothing busy and nothing hard. And then that's when you're going to lose your weight. Now, I'm going to tell you, there is no right time coming. There is a time that you will just do it and you will have reasons, but there's not a right time coming. We have to like get behind the idea of like, when is the last time my life? But think about how much weight you need to lose. If you have ten pounds to lose, you probably need two and a half months. When's the last time you had two and a half perfect months with no stress, no busy days, no loneliness, no boredom, nobody pulling you in any directions, no place to go, nobody inviting you. Like think about that. If you're like me, I had a hundred pounds to lose. I needed 18 months of perfection. That shit wasn't happening. I had a kid that was like a terror to raise. Sweet, sweet boy. But my God, that child never sat down, didn't like riding in cars, motoring all the time, cried when he was in the car seat, couldn't go nowhere. We were landlocked late and he didn't sleep. So we need to think about this because life is not lining up in perfect order so that we can lose weight. And it's not going to set. And I think the real fear, like if I'm really thinking about it, what happens is if I have the perfect life going on, that means I won't mess up. I'm like, oh my God, I don't care if everything's going perfectly. You're probably going to mess up for a thousand reasons. And it ain't because something's wrong with you. It is because it is normal to mess up things that are brand new to you. If you're having to change the way you do something, you are naturally going to mess it up at times simply because you are used to doing it. You don't know how to do it well yet. Y'all, this just makes fucking sense. But for some reason, when it comes to losing weight, we have this idea in our head that we either do it right or we just can't do it at all. And I know I harpoon this all the time, but my God is the biggest thing standing between you and losing weight. So that's the real problem. You think there's a perfect time coming where everything's going to line up perfectly so you can diet perfectly. And that is some bull fucking shit because you're going to make mistakes where there's the perfect time or not and everybody does. Everybody's going to mess up. I think the real problem is when you mess up, you don't know what to do when it happens. This is literally the absolute crux of weight loss. Stop looking for dots to tell you what to eat and shit. That is not as important as I need something simple that fits my life and I need a way to screw things up without giving up. I need a way to screw things up and learn from it so I can get better and better. I need a way to screw things up and learn why that's happening that has nothing to do with self-loathing, talking like an asshole of myself, beating myself up and tearing myself down. That's what I really need. So let's just all get on the same page here with that, because you've got to be able to handle those moments. Right now, when we make a mistake, we're handling it like a bitch, calling ourselves names, we're eating our face off, bitching and moaning to ourselves about it, feeling like shit and quitting. That's our current pattern. That's what we've practiced. And if that's the only thing you know to do when something doesn't go how you wanted, guess what? You ain't going to lose weight. Because the mistakes are all part of losing weight. This is why we have to quit waiting for the right time. You know the best time to lose weight is right in the middle of a shit storm when your life is the dumpster fire. Because if you can lose weight during that time, when smooth sailing times come, oh my God, you're unstoppable. You need a plan that works in the shit storm. You do not need to quit waiting for the right time. It just isn't coming. And even if it came, you're only losing, you're only learning how to lose weight when things are perfect. And if you look at the course of your life and you're like, you know what, I have weeks where everything kind of works well, and then I have weeks where it doesn't. Well, then you're going to be someone who starts and stops diets like it's a religion. You're going to be the person who writes in to me and says, Corinne, I keep losing and gaining the same 10 pounds over and over again. Because you are stuck in that pattern and we've got to break it. So if you really look at what's going on right now while you're waiting, I'm going to tell you right now. It's not like nothing's happening. When a woman keeps telling me now's not a good time, here's what's really happening during that time. She just eating like shit to get through a tough time. She is skipping meals when she's busy. She's eating whatever her mood dictates in the moment. If your mood is stressed and anxious, guess what? You ain't making no good food decisions. You're sitting there eating as if you don't give a fuck. You're like a honey badger. And that is just the truth. So what a lot of women are doing when they're waiting for their right time, is they're really saying, I'm just going to quit. I'm going to keep eating like an asshole until some magical time comes when I'm not stressed and anxious. And also what's going on is this is the deeper one that you probably don't even realize you're truly saying to yourself. I don't want to lose weight right now because what's going on in my life, I don't know how to deal with it other than eating. Trying to diet during this time means the food that I'm going to use to get through it is fixing to get taken away. And then I'm not going to have a way to get through it. Now, most of you don't think in that term, but I'm promising you, deep down, like your inner self knows that when you're in a stressed and anxious time, when you're in a busy season and stuff, if it thinks diets are going to be dangerous and somehow make it to where you can't perform, of course you're going to repel it. But I'm going to go back to what I was saying earlier. You've got to quit doing diets that require you to have a perfect life in order to do them. You've got to start doing something that works during the worst of times, that helps you get through those times without ruining your health, eating your face off, adding more and more weight that you're going to lose at some point. Because one of the things that I see is that when women keep waiting and waiting and we just keep eating through all of the stress, all of the busy-ness, all of the times in our life when we think we don't have time to lose weight. What we end up doing is we gain a lot of weight and we finally hit our what I call shit tolerance. Every woman has a time where they... All right, I want to pause here for just a second because if you've been listening to this podcast and you're thinking, Oh my gosh, I think Corinne is talking to me, then this is going to be really important. A lot of what I'm talking about in this episode is the exact stuff that we help you work through when you are a No BS woman inside the No BS Weightloss program. We don't just sit around like most diets and tell you what to eat, but we talk about what's going on in all of those moments where you normally quit or where you would normally eat your face off or where you normally say, I'm just going to start over tomorrow. Because the part that's really been missing for most women is knowing what to do in those moments and it's why we keep starting over and over and over again on our diets. So here's what I want you to do. I want you to get on the wait list by going to nobsweightloss.com/waitlist. No BS weightloss.com/waitlist. Because women wait for months just to join No BS. We ain't open all the time. And if you want in, this is the moment that you need to join. Because we will work on all the things that you're hearing in the podcast. But we're going to go deeper and we're going to help you personally with it. And we're going to make sure that you lose your weight. The link is also in the show notes. So go check it out and let's get back to the show. No, this is too much for me. It was 250 pounds every single time. I can't tell you how many times the scale would go up to 250 pounds. And when I would hit 250, suddenly I don't give a damn what was going on in my life. I could somehow rally and start a diet because in that moment, that 250 was the biggest danger. It was the thing that like all of a sudden this is the priority. Even if my life was busy, even if my life was stressed, somehow that was a lot louder. For a lot of you, it's fat pants. You have a certain size you won't go to. You have a certain pair of pants that when they don't fit, suddenly you're motivated and ready to lose weight. Whereas three days ago, you would have said, let me tell you all the reasons why now is not the right time. And then the second those bitches aren't buttoning, suddenly now I got time. Suddenly now I can reprioritize some stuff. We just have to realize that when you are trying to lose weight, if you wait to the right time, it's probably not common. Probably the time that's going to come is your shit tolerance is going to be met. And I don't want that for you. There's we can lose weight if we pick the right plans that work with real life. We don't have to gain a bunch of weight. We don't have to hit 250. We don't have to get our fat pants to where they don't even fit anymore. Before we're allowed to reprioritize, before we're allowed to say, like, now's the time. So let me give you an example because I think it's really, it's really good to kind of see what actually happens with a real client of mine. So this client recently needed knee surgery really bad, but she was so overweight that the doctors, they just refused to operate on her because she couldn't take the anesthesia. And unless she lost some weight, they were really concerned, it just wasn't going to be safe for her. Now, at the same time of dealing with all this chronic pain, these painful knees, desperate to lose some weight, she was also taking care of a husband who had dementia. So just think about this. I'm in a lot of pain. I'm still going to a job that happens to be very stressful. And when I leave that job, I've got to go home to a situation that is also sad and really stressful. So I remember when she decided to join, one of the first things she did was she made a post and she tagged me and said, Corinne, you've got to help me figure this out. I just can't wait any longer. And we talked and she said, my wife is not going to get any easier. I have to have this surgery or I am not going to be able to take care of my husband and I'm not going to be able to keep my job. So you can just imagine how much stress and fear and pain that this woman was living in. I mean, the physical pain that my client was under was almost unbearable. And then she had all of this emotional pain that was almost unbearable. And so when she came into the program, she said that she's been eating over it. And that's why she joined us because she was like, you're the only one who keeps talking about how we have got to fix the reasons why we're overeating. And I know that you're not going to tell me to quit my job and leave my husband so I can lose my weight. You are going to help me figure out how do I lose weight while all of this is going on, not when all of this is over. Because for her, there was no season coming anytime soon where things were going to calm down. This was her everyday life. Her husband needed help every night, and she had to juggle a stressful job every day. So we made a decision together that this was going to work in the life that she had, and that we were going to together build her program around, I ain't doing dick that doesn't work with the current life I'm in. And I'm going to learn from Corinne, how do I eat in a way that supports my knees, and how do I quit eating just because my knees are hurting? And then we talked about her job, and we talked about how are we going to have a stressful job and not eat over it? Where are the places in this job that go on internally for her that could relieve some pressure? Because if you don't know, so much of our stress comes from how we think about things. I don't want to guess like anybody and say that there's not just stressful things that happen in life. I really do believe that happens. But what I also know after helping thousands of women lose weight and helping myself lose weight is this. A lot of the pressure and a lot of the stress we feel is self-inflicted wounds. For example, my client, when we got to talking about her work stress, one of the reasons why she felt so much pressure at work is because she always told herself, she wasn't doing enough every day. And when I asked her, who's telling you outside of you, how do you know you're not doing enough? And she would like, well, look at my workload. It's just, it's like, it's just a lot and I never get to the end. And so I said, has a boss told you that you're not doing enough? She's like, no. In fact, he tells me all the time, he can't believe how much work I actually do get done. I said, all right. So we know that you are getting enough done through the employer's eyes so that your thought is wrong. And I said, just let me ask you a question. If you weren't sitting around in a shitty diaper, telling yourself you're not doing enough, let's just look at your workload. Do you think there's ever an end zone, like an end time? And she's like, well, no, not really. Just by the nature of our work, there's always going to be things to do. And I said, OK, so you don't need to tell yourself you're not doing enough. You need to tell yourself the truth. The truth is, my boss is impressed with me. The truth is, I don't have the kind of job where you end with a checklist of everything done every day. That's not how this job works. And let me just tell you, she felt so much better. And we worked on other things. We worked on her needs. We worked on her relationship with her husband, her feeling guilty for leaving him all day, her resentment that she had to take care of him, just all the things that was going on for her. So her life didn't get any easier. But what we did was we made it easier for her not to eat over her life anymore. So the bottom line is this for you. If you want Weightloss to work, it must fit your actual life. It cannot be designed around a fantasy version of your life where everything is calm and easy. It has to fit your real life. And it has to be looking at what is actually going on in your real life and helping you find ways to make, not only losing weight easier, but where in my real life can I make some things easier? Because I don't have perspective right now. I need someone who does have perspective. So I want you to think about the hardest parts of your life, the moments where you usually eat over them, the times when you are stressed and you're tired and you're overwhelmed. And I want you to remind yourself, these moments probably aren't going anywhere anytime soon. So I can either keep letting those things be the things that break my diet and that I eat over them, or I can work with someone that actually helps me through them. Or I can learn how to not eat over these things. Because I want you to know what to do in all of the stressful moments, all of the sad moments, the lonely moments, the guilty moments, every moment that you have. I want you to know exactly what to do in those moments that doesn't require eating. I want it to be to where you can handle those kinds of moments. You cannot eat over them. You can still lose weight, and you can be damn proud of yourself for how you're living your life. All right, everybody. I hope you have a really great week. Now we'll see you next week. Bye bye. All right. If you're sitting there thinking, damn it, Corinne, everything you just said makes a complete sense. No wonder I'm not losing weight. This is the shit I need to be doing. And I have got great news for you. No BS Weightloss is opening very soon. So you need to get on the VIP Weightlist because if you don't, you may miss it. You'll not only miss the rare opportunity to join, because they only open a few times each year. Women have been waiting for months just to start working with us. You got to get on the Weightlist now. Go to nobsweightloss.com/weightlist. That's nobsweightloss.com/weightlist. The link is also in the show notes, because when we blow open those doors, hundreds of women are going to join and they are going to be losing their weight. The last thing I want you doing is listening to the podcast in a month or two, regretting that you didn't get started. All right, I will see you next week.