transcript

Speaker 1:
[00:00] The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

Speaker 2:
[00:14] From Vanderpump Rules to Motherhood and Everywhere in Between. Warm up the kettle. It's time to spill some tea. Let's get into some Scheananigans with Scheana Shay.

Speaker 3:
[00:43] All right. And we are back for another week of Scheananigans. The girls in the studio this week. We're kind of just doing some looser intros now.

Speaker 4:
[00:53] Okay.

Speaker 3:
[00:53] Where we get a little bit of the before talk and then it's like, wait, what were they talking about? So I'm just trying to be a little more relaxed with the intros. So you can do what you got to do. You're good.

Speaker 5:
[01:03] My hot water was really good.

Speaker 3:
[01:04] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[01:05] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[01:05] I have mint tea with a little honey. Got Kiki and Krystina in the house. And I feel like it's been a minute since it was the three of us.

Speaker 4:
[01:15] Yeah. It has been a long time. Definitely 2025, but I don't even know what part of 2025.

Speaker 5:
[01:21] What were we even talking about? Was it Atlanta?

Speaker 4:
[01:23] I think so.

Speaker 3:
[01:24] Yeah. Oh, dang. And now Atlanta is back on. I'm so behind I haven't even been able to watch yet.

Speaker 4:
[01:30] Oh, it's so good. Kate Michelle is such a... I'm so glad they added her.

Speaker 3:
[01:35] I started Rhode Island and then I am finally caught up on Beverly Hills. I just finished that last night. And then Summer House, obviously, keeping up to date with that. And then I'm behind on Southern Hospitality.

Speaker 5:
[01:47] Ladies of London?

Speaker 3:
[01:48] No, I don't have time. You don't have time. It's Atlanta or London. Pick one. I can't do both.

Speaker 4:
[01:55] That's hard.

Speaker 5:
[01:56] I would go Atlanta because Kate Michelle is hilarious.

Speaker 4:
[01:59] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[01:59] I love a value add.

Speaker 4:
[02:01] The Ladies of London is so good.

Speaker 5:
[02:02] They're so quirky.

Speaker 4:
[02:03] Because you love all of them. I love all of them. I mean, Mark is pissing me off a little bit now, but...

Speaker 3:
[02:08] Part of me after these seasons wrap up, just want to be done with reality TV and just go back to scripted and watch like true talent, real shows, like, you know?

Speaker 5:
[02:19] I would say that, but I'm just going to watch more vertical shorts and get sucked into little tiny mini dramas on my phone. And I own that. I'm okay with it. There's no guilt in my pleasure.

Speaker 4:
[02:28] And you're doing vertical shorts now, right?

Speaker 3:
[02:30] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[02:31] Yes, we did a parody of a vertical short and it's called Falling in Love with My Ex's Warlock Patron. And it's about like, it's basically every trope that you have, the slap with the over exaggerated spin. I like we did this right before Bravo Con and I was at Bravo Con with a little sit on my wrist because I was like, I do my own stunts and I rolled around and like did this, but I got slapped probably like 20 times. It was amazing.

Speaker 3:
[02:59] No way. Like in the face.

Speaker 5:
[03:00] Like that, like for real, it was like the pretend slaps.

Speaker 3:
[03:03] I mean, hey, go all in.

Speaker 4:
[03:06] Yeah, I want to get into this. This is like, I mean, apparently this is the future. So I'm like, all right, how do I get in?

Speaker 3:
[03:11] People are making a living doing these now. One of my friends I used to work with at Sir, he is doing like a bunch of vertical shorts right now, and that's like paying all the bills. Yes. Have you seen him?

Speaker 5:
[03:21] Yes. I watched one that he was in where he is a fireman, and he comes and this lady gets dumped at the altar, but she still wants to get married. She's like, I don't want to date any more rich guys. Hey, fireman, do you want to marry me? And he's like, okay. But it turns out he's secretly a billionaire who just moonlights as a fireman because he's just a good person. And he's like, I don't want her to find out that I'm, I'm rich. What's going to happen if she finds out that I'm rich? And then she finds out that he's rich. She's like, how could you?

Speaker 3:
[03:48] I feel like it's like the new soap opera, but in like a couple of minutes short form, right?

Speaker 4:
[03:52] Well, I don't even know if it's a couple of minutes. That's the problem. Like I would get sucked into them on TikTok. And so I would be like, okay. And then I would end up in this path. And then it kept going and it kept going.

Speaker 3:
[04:00] Wait, now I need to know how it ends.

Speaker 4:
[04:01] And then I would never get to the end. And I realized I would never be a good edger because I like started getting like frustrated and I'm like, no, I just want to come.

Speaker 3:
[04:10] She just wants to come.

Speaker 5:
[04:14] It's literally a minute, but it's the music cues that get you. And then it's like, you hear that ding, but then you gotta know what happened after that.

Speaker 3:
[04:21] It is.

Speaker 5:
[04:21] It's the whole soap opera format in a more like addictive, like Quibi tried it, it didn't land. But they've like mastered it in this way that I have no life anymore.

Speaker 4:
[04:30] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[04:30] Okay. How were your weekends?

Speaker 4:
[04:33] I actually had the most beautiful weekend. I mean, I can't even explain why. I mean, I can, but it would be too long. But it was just like such a beautiful weekend that I was just like, I came out refreshed, revived and like on a path to like, I know what I'm doing this year. I was feeling a little lost.

Speaker 3:
[04:49] I'm obsessed with the nails, by the way.

Speaker 4:
[04:51] They're a little too long. I like-

Speaker 3:
[04:53] No, it's my perfect length. I love them.

Speaker 4:
[04:56] I wanted to be very like summer pink. But I was like, they're a little long, but you know what? We're just going to do it.

Speaker 3:
[05:02] I love it.

Speaker 5:
[05:02] They're really good. I love it.

Speaker 3:
[05:04] How was your weekend?

Speaker 5:
[05:05] My weekend was good. We went to a mother-daughter dance with Zoey.

Speaker 3:
[05:08] That's right. I saw that. That was so cute.

Speaker 5:
[05:11] We got our makeup done. She had her little- the theme was denim and diamonds and pearls. We had little pearls and diamonds all over. My daughter was one of the last people on the dance floor. I was like, bra.

Speaker 3:
[05:23] That is your daughter.

Speaker 5:
[05:24] I salute.

Speaker 3:
[05:25] Like mother like daughter.

Speaker 5:
[05:26] It was so cute. Just to have that night and that date with her. Then the next day I went and Zeke was like, mommy, I want to go on a date with you too. We went to Sky Zone, just me and him.

Speaker 3:
[05:36] So cute.

Speaker 4:
[05:36] Oh my God. I want to go to the Sky Zone. Mercedes was talking about, she just took a Shams.

Speaker 3:
[05:41] She texts me that morning and she goes, will I see you tonight? I was like, at what? She's like, Shams birthday. I'm like, didn't get an invite. She's like, here it is. I can't come now. It was from 5 to 8 PM on a school night.

Speaker 4:
[05:55] Well, yeah, because she was saying how she rented out the entire facility and she did it on a midweek. And so it was 5 to 8. So it was like less than 4 grand, which I was kind of like, oh, I mean, I mean, I want to be bouncing around and stuff.

Speaker 3:
[06:09] Yeah, it was just due last minute.

Speaker 5:
[06:11] They built this one next to the Chuck E. Cheese. Like they bought out the entire, which is where my like shaved ice place was. And they tore it down for this guy's own. But I'm going to forgive them because they have a big slide. But they like made this whole entire like plaza. So now it's just a Chuck E. Cheese and a Sky Zone.

Speaker 4:
[06:28] Okay.

Speaker 3:
[06:29] Nice.

Speaker 4:
[06:29] No, but can adults play in the Sky Zone only if you have kids? Yes. No, you can play socks.

Speaker 3:
[06:34] Yeah, you just, you have to sign the waiver, put on the grippy socks and you're good to go. Because if your kid gets trapped up in the 10th story of the playhouse, you know, you have to go save them. Okay. I've had to do that.

Speaker 5:
[06:46] And then they'll let you take the slide down if they think it's...

Speaker 4:
[06:48] I love that. No, I'm trying to think of more creative ways to work out. I think if it's more fun, I'll be more inclined to do it.

Speaker 3:
[06:54] Yeah. I do love a good trampoline.

Speaker 5:
[06:56] And the American Ninja Warrior thing that they have. The American Gladiator, they have like the big Q-tip.

Speaker 4:
[07:01] They're bringing back the Gladiators. You should try out.

Speaker 5:
[07:05] Oh. I'm like, I just want to lay down for like a minute. I'm so tired.

Speaker 3:
[07:13] So I went down to San Diego this weekend and I had Summer with me. We did a dinner cruise with Zack and Hannah. They're going to be on the podcast in a couple of weeks. We can talk about all that.

Speaker 5:
[07:24] I do want to know how that cruise was.

Speaker 4:
[07:26] I was curious because when I saw the picture, I was like, oh, I didn't realize Ronnie was there. I didn't realize he hosted it.

Speaker 3:
[07:31] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[07:32] And so I was surprised because I didn't know if you guys, like if you hung out with the Watch What Happens guys or.

Speaker 3:
[07:37] I haven't really hung out with them. I did the award show thing that they did where I won my crappy a couple of years ago. And Hannah and him are really good friends. So she was staying with him.

Speaker 4:
[07:48] Got it.

Speaker 3:
[07:48] But yeah, so we had that down there. Summer came, I paid her 20 bucks too. She wanted a jobby job. And so I was like, Hannah, we have to give her a job. And Hannah, oh my God, she reminds me so much of Brock's sister. I mean, the accent is just like so like if I was talking to one of them on the phone, I might not know which one I was talking to. It's so similar with just the cadence and everything. And I was saying, I was like, oh my God, you remind me so much of Brock's sister. And she was like, is that a good thing? Do you like her? And I was like, no, I love her. But then hours later, Brock was like, God, you remind me of my sister. And so I think Summer just, I mean, super gravitated towards her because just it felt like family.

Speaker 4:
[08:28] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[08:29] She's a mommy.

Speaker 5:
[08:30] She's got that energy.

Speaker 3:
[08:30] Exactly. And so she was like, Summer, let's go downstairs and let's make a menu. And so they made a menu so Summer could play waitress. And then she's like, well, what else is my job? And I was like, when we do the trivia game, you can hand out the prizes. And it was so cute. Holly from Vanderpump Rules Party brought her daughters. And they had like little necklaces and things for Summer to make. And it was so fun.

Speaker 4:
[08:51] How many people were on the cruise?

Speaker 3:
[08:53] Honestly, I don't know, but the room we were in for the Q&A was like completely full. So it was nice. Yeah, it was a good thing. I would like to do that again.

Speaker 5:
[09:02] It looks like it was really cool. And it was like, I saw the lineup, I was like, oh, I wanna go. Yeah. And I love Ronnie. So it's just, what was it after the crappies? What, that was the first crappies that you went to.

Speaker 3:
[09:16] Yeah. I never knew if they liked me or not. I know they've like talked shit or they like, my friend or my employees or whatever. However, he does that.

Speaker 5:
[09:23] Oh, his corner.

Speaker 3:
[09:25] Yeah. But there was something, I can't remember what it was. He said something that, I don't know, it was funny, but no, we had a good time. And Summer stayed up way past her bedtime. We stayed with our old neighbors, old, like you still live next to you, but also old in life, 87. And so we got back to the house and then Summer was like, okay, it's Couchella time. So we did a little Couchella with her and it was so cute. And then it was like 1030 and I'm like, homegirl, you got to go to sleep. We have Lego land in the morning. I'm obsessed with that place, by the way. We had no idea about the Galactic Coaster. That shit is like Space Mountain. Just as fast. Have you been on it?

Speaker 5:
[10:12] No, we literally, there was so much, we could not get to the whole part because we went when we did Comic Con last year.

Speaker 3:
[10:17] So I showed her YouTube videos of Lego land. There's this one part right next to the Galactic Coaster where you go and you build a rocket out of Legos and then you go put it in this thing. It scans it and then you're playing with the rocket in a video game. Obsessed. So we think we're like going into that part maybe, but then they're like, no, it's a ride. And I was like, okay, this isn't what we were thinking. But we get on. She's tall enough to ride all of the rides, with an adult. You have to be 48 inches to ride by yourself. So we get on and then they're like getting ready to blast off. And we're like, oh, and so I thought she's like literally, but she is like, oh my God. And then I mean, it's whipping around. It's it is Space Mountain. Yeah. It is the exact same ride just at Legoland. And so I was like, honey, if you can do this ride, you can do Space Mountain. Like, do you want to do this again? And she's like, I don't know.

Speaker 4:
[11:11] She's like, I was like, I mean, was this her first, like really fast roller coaster like that?

Speaker 3:
[11:17] She's been on little roller coasters and had that same reaction. But this one was fast. Like it takes your breath away for a second. You know, it was just like, and after she was like, that was so fun. But the whole time on it, I was like holding on to her and she's like gripping on to me. That's kind of better. I was like, honey, on the YouTube video you were watching, did you see that ride? She's like, yeah, but I didn't know it was like that fast. And so then we went and let her build the rocket.

Speaker 5:
[11:44] Did she get the driver's license?

Speaker 3:
[11:45] She did. She got her driver's license.

Speaker 5:
[11:48] You get to like drive through the little town and they get to drive. Oh my gosh.

Speaker 3:
[11:51] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[11:53] It's like five to 11.

Speaker 4:
[11:55] Okay.

Speaker 3:
[11:55] So they have the three to five year olds and then they have the six to 12 or 13 or whatever. And Brock was like, we're getting in this line. She's six. And I'm like, I am not about saying that it's okay for your child to lie about their age. But then I'm like looking at the different cars and I was like, she needs to be on that side. So I was like, I don't want any part of this.

Speaker 4:
[12:17] Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[12:19] So that was fun. But I love Legoland.

Speaker 4:
[12:22] Okay.

Speaker 5:
[12:22] Yeah. It's super underrated. I love it. Oh my gosh. That's where I want to go so bad for the birthdays. I'm like, do you want to do an experience for your birthday or have a party? Because we could go to Legoland and stay at the hotel. When we walk outside, Legoland is there.

Speaker 3:
[12:36] You have to lead them into, and Brock says I do that too much. Like the other night, we're feeding her a meatball and I was like, oh, is it not warm enough? He's like, don't ask that. I'm like, does it need a little salt? Do you not like the texture? He was like, stop leading her. She goes, all of it. I don't like all of it. Then I was like, hold please. So I go, I heat up the meatball a little. I sprinkle a little salt. Mommy, I love it. I'm like, she's got a good palate. You give her a cold meatball, she's not going to like it. I took a bite and I was like, but a little warm, a little salt and he was just raised so different. My mom definitely was accommodating to me. If I didn't like something, I'd have something else because she always wanted me to have a full belly. Brock, with the mom who worked full time, youngest of five, he ate whatever cold scraps were left over, poor guy. But I'm like, we don't have to raise her that way. I get it, but if she wants the meatball, she needs to be a little warm with some salt. Give her a little seasoning.

Speaker 4:
[13:35] Let the woman eventually grow into knowing what she wants. Exactly. You're developing her palate. She understands like, oh, that was what was missing. I need a little salt.

Speaker 3:
[13:44] Exactly. You always lead her. When you said that, it's like, well, would you want to do an experience because we could do this. It's like, sure, you're leading them.

Speaker 5:
[13:52] It's an emphatic suggestion.

Speaker 3:
[13:54] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[13:55] You don't know. You have to let them know. They haven't been in this world long.

Speaker 5:
[13:59] You know the 14 places you've ever been. Then it's like, there's more outside here.

Speaker 3:
[14:05] Right?

Speaker 5:
[14:05] You know there's a whole Disneyland in Tokyo.

Speaker 3:
[14:08] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[14:08] There's so much.

Speaker 3:
[14:09] I want to go so bad. I want to take her to the under the sea Tokyo Disney thing. Christy just got back from Japan this morning. She's like, I wanted to go, but I think I'll just wait and go with you because she didn't want to subject her husband to that.

Speaker 4:
[14:23] Why was everyone in Japan this past month? My friend also just got back from Japan with her family and she was like, I want to go on a girl's trip. It's so fun there. I've never been.

Speaker 3:
[14:30] Flights have been really cheap. Yeah, my sister went a few months ago because her friend was out there on a job. And that's the thing, Christy's husband had a job out there. But the flights have been really inexpensive.

Speaker 5:
[14:42] And you can go to the Disneyland parks there and get your flight and stuff for cheaper sometimes than it is to go here.

Speaker 4:
[14:49] That's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[14:51] Right?

Speaker 4:
[14:52] That's what I've also been hearing about the Olympics, though. People were like, I was able to fly to another country, to do all of that cheaper than it is to do the LA just with the tickets.

Speaker 3:
[15:00] Yeah. Did you guys end up getting Olympic anything?

Speaker 4:
[15:02] I didn't even sign up for anything.

Speaker 3:
[15:03] I didn't sign up for it. I just used my family because they all signed up for it. So I was like, OK, we got I think women's rugby quarterfinals, something. And I'm like, I don't know why.

Speaker 4:
[15:14] I mean, maybe I'm just like in my head, I'm just thinking like, I don't know. Like it'll come around. And I just feel like there might be an opportunity once it's here. And then I'll just take a jump on that.

Speaker 3:
[15:22] And I'm like, if I'm still in the NBC Universal Peacock fam, maybe there's an opportunity there. Brock can host something. But I wanted to secure at least one thing to take her to. And I'm like, OK, we were looking at soccer because she says she wants to play soccer. She might not want to once she starts playing. Two years from now, she might not like soccer. I'm like, rugby is always going to be a part of our family. Let's take her to see women play rugby. And then hopefully she doesn't want to play rugby because that's terrifying.

Speaker 5:
[15:53] Listen, I will say this. I have a slight beef with the Olympics. It has nothing to do with patriotism. It has nothing to do with anything except for the fact that when I was out on summer vacation as a kid, I remember being super excited about the plot line on Days of Our Lives. And I was so hyped, and it had like ended on a cliffhanger. And it wasn't even like Marlena, I think it was like during the era where they had like, Kirsten Storms was on there and it was like, Belle and Sean and they had like all the teens and everything. And they kind of like focused on those storylines. And then one day I go to watch it and they were like, this show has been preempted by the Olympics. And then the next day, this show has been preempted by the Olympics. And it did that for an entire summer. And then I had to go back to school. And it's like, what am I supposed to do? Pretend to be sick so I can stay home and get caught up. I didn't have soap net back then.

Speaker 4:
[16:43] Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 5:
[16:44] So yeah, that's what it is.

Speaker 3:
[16:45] How do you re-watch soaps nowadays? Like, how would I watch All My Children? It's like, can you stream it? And I'm like, OK, I'm going to go back and watch it. Like, how do you even watch soaps on YouTube?

Speaker 5:
[16:54] They all went to Prospect Park. When everything went down and all the soaps were going, like they were moving things online. So it was like Passions went to Direct TV. But then they had All My Children, One Life to Live. All of those shows went to a company called Prospect Park and they were going to continue the stories. However, what they've decided to do now, it is coming back to Lifetime with Susan Lucci. Stop. There's a TV show right now where Susan Lucci is.

Speaker 3:
[17:17] All My Children is?

Speaker 5:
[17:18] Yes. As like Lifetime movies with Erica Cain.

Speaker 3:
[17:22] I love that.

Speaker 5:
[17:24] And Susan Lucci is playing. She's on this show with Keanu Reeves. I think it's the Apple TV show.

Speaker 4:
[17:28] It's a movie. Yeah, I just watched it.

Speaker 5:
[17:30] And she plays a real housewife of Beverly Hills and she's in like the actual intro card.

Speaker 3:
[17:35] Wade, I love that.

Speaker 4:
[17:36] I was going to say that was the best part of that movie.

Speaker 3:
[17:38] Devious Maids when I think that was the show where she basically played like a real housewife sort of thing.

Speaker 4:
[17:44] Yeah, I love it. I know it's so good.

Speaker 3:
[17:46] Okay, we're going to take a quick break and then I want to get into Ciara's Glamour article because I know we all have a lot of thoughts. You're back. As we know, festival season is in full swing and that means Revolves Festival Shop is now open. It's basically my go-to for festival season because it is built around that festival energy. If you know what I'm talking about, they have a section dedicated to festivals, standout looks, confident, a little bit extra but still effortless. And Revolve makes it so easy. Like think head-to-toe outfits that feel styled already, not piecing things together last minute. That is what I love about Revolve. They have statement pieces, sets. We all know I love a matching set and textures that actually feel like a moment. And it's designed for festivals but also works for trips, long weekends, nights out. You know, you have a girls night out. You want something new. I definitely would wear something to a festival and a night out on the town. But that's just me. You can get one for each. They have something for everyone, for every event, every single thing you need. For a night in, a night out, a date night, Revolve makes it easy. And it makes packing and planning outfits way easier because everything already goes together. It's elevated, but still easy. Looks that stand out without trying too hard. I have my festival looks ready to go thanks to Revolve. And whether it's a big night out, a wedding, a trip, or you just need something last minute that actually works, Revolve always has it. Go to revolve.com/good as gold to shop my faves and use code good as gold for 15% off your first order. And definitely check out the festival shop while you're there. It's fast shipping, easy returns, it just makes everything easier. That's revolve.com/good as gold. You can shop my faves and get 15% off your first order. Offer ends May 8th, so don't miss out.

Speaker 1:
[19:53] Have you ever looked in the mirror and not recognized yourself? Me f***ing too. Hi, I'm Caroline Baudino from Instagram shop with Caroline and host of Coming In Hot. This tough New Yorker who swore she would never depend on a man lives to wear all her jewels and look fabulous. Let everyone else's expectations of being a mom, a wife, a daughter to Cuban parents take priority. I finally put my oxygen mask on first and took the biggest bet of my life. Join me every Monday on Coming In Hot to deep dive finding your own happy tools and living your best life too. Yes, we can.

Speaker 3:
[20:34] Okay. So I know you two have read Ciara's full interview with Glamour as have I, more than once. I felt like I kept going back to it and just reading it again and just getting a little more out of it each time because there were just certain parts that I found like there was nothing new or just that stuck out to me. I feel like on the surface, it is about her experience on Summer House, her relationship, everything we've all been watching play out and whatnot. But it didn't just feel like a relationship recap. It was really going deep and explaining how she moves through the world and about how that experience is just fundamentally different in ways that honestly, I don't think, I mean, I know everyone doesn't have to deal with on a daily basis. And I know having you two here, you can definitely speak on experience, which I can't. And so I feel like this also is one of those moments where reality TV just really does something valuable. The conversations they've had about race this season, this article, the way she handled all of this with such fucking grace and poise. I mean, we always want to talk about the drama and the chaos on reality TV. But when you get a perspective like this, that kind of forces you to step out of your own experience for a second, really take a look at someone else's, that's just that is one of the great things about reality TV.

Speaker 5:
[22:02] I have so many thoughts.

Speaker 3:
[22:03] I know. So it's like I want to talk to you two about this specifically, because I know there are layers to what she's saying that I can read and try to understand. But it's like you have lived experience in a way that I never will. So I'm curious what stood out most to you, or what parts were most relatable from your own experiences. Obviously, you're in an interracial marriage. So yeah, let's just get into it.

Speaker 5:
[22:32] I think obviously, like going into it with that lens, and a lot of people will say, oh, well, you've beat racism. It doesn't happen now. Look at you. You're an interracial couple. And it's like his whiteness and privilege don't absolve my lived experiences as a black woman. That doesn't take anything away from me. I don't get to move through the world with his privilege just because of like by proxy of him. And the thing is, when you talk about the safety of interracial dating, especially interracial dating, Ciara's from the South, I'm from the South.

Speaker 3:
[23:03] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[23:03] Sometimes you have people that are dating you as an experiment. They will talk to you, they will sneak you a note, they will sneak in your back door, but they will not publicly claim you or even acknowledge you to your face in public. Like they would rather lose a tooth than have somebody know that they were like with a black person by choice. And it's hard because you don't want to be that skeptical, but you have to be guarded. We have to be guarded in so many of the things that we do, like simply, like if I were to think about just leaving my house with my kids and just like going out the door, I'm not. It's like, no, my children have a different perception on them. Like the level of like, if my son were to do something and he's the same age as a child that's with him, it looks for some people, and especially in the groups that we are in, like whatever he's doing comes across more aggressive than anyone else. And to have to like know that parts of his self have to be filtered. And I try not to, because like I don't want him to move through the world like that, or with my like coming from growing up in the South. And then being someone who dates interracially, like I've had guys that will absolutely not like ever say they have dated me. Now they will. And I've gotten a couple of DMs about it, keep them. But it's just like to be in this situation where you give someone your trust, you tell someone upfront, I don't want to be this. I already have this perception. She's already been called Jezebel on this show. And the racial connotation behind that of black women being more overtly sexual, not being like being maternal, but in the sense of to take care of someone else's children. All of these things that we're seen as, except for just people allowed to exist. Like Ciara is not just a beautiful person. Ciara is educated. Ciara is a doctor, Ciara or a nurse. Ciara is out there. She was out there during COVID. She's a model. She's all of these things. But when people go back and watch this show that gets to, and you know this better than anybody, this show and these actions that live out there forever, she has to continue to hear, you got clowned by this dude. She has to live with that. All of those decisions and it's a whole community, even her own community saying like, you let this white boy play you on television. She's crying over this because it's hard. You don't want to think about these things. You don't want to have to think 20 moves ahead before you go out about safety, about what neighborhood are we going to, about being like the auxiliary friend. And it's like you go and it's like, there's people like, I will go and I'll be like, when is the last time you were around a black person? Like go look at your social media and look back. And there's lots of people out here who can talk a big game about it. But it's like, does your life reflect what you were saying? Or are you just saying something because it's a talking point? We still have to live this every day. You can't take it off. You can't change it. And I wouldn't want to because I fucking love being a black woman. But I wish it wasn't so fucking hard. I wish that Ciara was able to go on that show and just be pretty and have fun and hook up with somebody and chill and not have to deal with all of the ramifications and things that come with that. And people not seeing her as enough of a person that they have to respect that they would play her like that.

Speaker 3:
[26:33] I know.

Speaker 4:
[26:34] And in addition to that, like I want her to be able to also go on. I would love for her to be able to go on to this reunion. And I hate having to compare this to Scandival, but she should also be allowed to go on that stage and say, fuck yourself with the fucking cheese grater.

Speaker 3:
[26:49] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[26:50] But she won't because she has to be above it. She has to have grace. Yeah. No, fuck that. She should be able to allow it to you. And it pisses me off to no end because I know there's rage inside.

Speaker 3:
[27:06] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[27:06] But she has to just temper it, which isn't fair at all.

Speaker 3:
[27:10] No, it's not fair at all because she should be able to fucking go in on this woman who was her best friend and on this man who played her time and time again.

Speaker 4:
[27:22] Yeah. The people that are defending Amanda, I get it. It's like, I get she should not be getting all the threats and the doxing. We all know that. Normal people know that. But she's a public figure on a reality show who did a bad thing. She does not think that she's going to get read the riot act. She would be delusional to think that. The people defending Amanda, it's funny, I saw this post on threads today where it was like, they went into the person's profile who was defending Amanda. She was just like, this is what I expect from you. Because there was a picture of all of the Summer House cast, but this was when Paige was still on. And it was like, oh, look at West, because he had his hand around Amanda's neck in this picture, and she's next to Kyle. And someone in the comments was like, but what about Ciara? She's pretty close to Kyle. And the person, someone commented, they go, Ciara's nowhere near Kyle in that picture, because it was Gabby. And she was like, exactly. You don't even know the black girl that is sitting next to Kyle, but this, because this is at the end. And the reason, I obviously, as an entertainment journalist, try to be as biased as possible. But the reality is, Kiki Monique is not. Yeah. She has opinions and like, she's going to express them. And specifically in this situation, I mean, a lot of the discourse we've seen is from black women. I get so triggered because it specifically reminds me of a woman, two women who were in my life recently, who got cut out around the same time. And the narrative that they spread when we ended ties to everyone was how I was the bully, how I was mean to them. And I was literally like, what? And it kind of came full circle because, you know, one of them was going to be around me recently. And this person asked like, is that okay? And I said, is it okay? I was the victim. I remember how this went down. And I said, it's anytime a black woman is against any non-black person, no matter what happens, even when they're the victim, they will be perceived as the bully no matter what. And so in this situation, if she goes on that stage, Amanda is going to just look like the victim no matter what to some people.

Speaker 5:
[29:30] Being yelled at by an angry black woman. You think it's not a thing? Look at the TMZ article where the first thing they said, what was vitriolic about that glamour interview? Like name anything where she wished them well. And they still said, see the vitriolic statement from Ciara. It's like, no, like nothing about her. And even if she was, she has the right to her emotion.

Speaker 3:
[29:53] She's hurt. She was betrayed. Like, it's just, ugh.

Speaker 5:
[29:58] Just like the, I like, I want her to have the grace. And but I know, like, people are already twisting themselves in knots to make her the like villain in her own victimization.

Speaker 3:
[30:11] No.

Speaker 5:
[30:12] And it's, like, and not calling her a victim. Like, it's just so, like, the tight walk of it all.

Speaker 3:
[30:18] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[30:19] And it's, like, honestly, for me, the conversations around friendship have been extremely, like, thought provoking. And I feel like their conversations, I hate the situation, but I do appreciate the conversations that have been allowed to happen because you don't think about those things and, like, not just interracial dating, interracial friendships.

Speaker 3:
[30:38] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[30:39] And, like, the dynamics of that and how it feels. And it's, in all these situations, the biggest issue is being an afterthought. Like, West literally sat there and, like, made out with a girl against her back while saying, like, he didn't give an F.

Speaker 3:
[30:55] He didn't care. He's like, but who cares really?

Speaker 4:
[30:58] And then lied about it afterwards, like, I didn't see her there.

Speaker 3:
[31:01] Right. On the episode this week is acting like he didn't see, like, her mother fucker. Okay, you were drunk, but, like, you literally whisper to the girl, I used to date her, but who cares really?

Speaker 4:
[31:12] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[31:13] That was so gross.

Speaker 4:
[31:14] There was a lot of words he used in that conversation that they had, and it was pissing me off even more because you could tell that, once again, Ciara had let down her guard and was letting him in one more time when he did not deserve it, and he was still using words just like, if we never talk again.

Speaker 3:
[31:34] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[31:35] Why would that even be something you would say in this conversation right now where I've let down my guard because I'm trying to develop a friendship with you? What?

Speaker 3:
[31:44] Even the way he said, we're just not each other's people. People, I feel like has a different connotation than person. She's just not my person.

Speaker 4:
[31:53] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[31:53] Everyone can have a person, but for him to be like, we're not each other's people. It's like, what do you mean by that?

Speaker 4:
[31:58] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[31:58] You want to know which one pissed me off the most for real? I haven't had a chance to vent about this properly. It was when he was like, he's like, yeah, it's a nighttime crush. It's not a lunch crush. It's definitely not a daytime crush. Definitely not a daytime crush. It was the way that he was speaking about her, and I found it so disrespectful. The way that he keeps having these side conversations, she's terrifying. And it's like, oh, and I was so like, I didn't know what to say. And she had this achievement. And it's like, how do you just say congratulations? Bitch, you say congratulations. The words are right there. Literally. It's not awkward. You're making it awkward because you want to sit in the corner and pout because you're still trying to be the victim in this situation about how Big Bad Ciara said words about me. Because I did shit to personally break her trust and the boundaries that she clearly set and told me about. But she is the one in the wrong in this situation. And he can't understand why people don't see that she's the one in the wrong. She should be the bad person in this. And that's what he's doing. And it's kind of what Amanda is doing low key to Kyle too. Which, listen, Kyle has his things, but you also see Kyle being neglected and being like, Hey, will you please just kiss me or hug me?

Speaker 4:
[33:16] It's clear that they haven't had sex in a long time. So, yeah.

Speaker 5:
[33:20] And it's, but she's just like, Oh my God, look at him. Like, it's this. It's demeaning. Like any kind of jab that she can get in. And it's almost like, and I truly, it's not, you know, I hate a self production, but it does feel like they are self producing to this point of trying to like, we have to be able to come out of this, like the pristine golden couple. How do we do that? Oh, I'm there for you when he's yelling at you. Like it's me. And I'm talking to him like, hey, bud, you gotta chill out with all that.

Speaker 4:
[33:50] Like. And he's, and West's only tool in thinking that he can get back in the good graces of the audience is by flirting with Ciara. And that's why we're reading into this. Cause he's like, if I show that I'm still into her, then they will like me again. Not realizing she and us are still picking up on these. Like, oh, there must be something there when it's not. It's just him being his little manipulative clout demon ass.

Speaker 3:
[34:19] Diabolical, I swear. Going back to the article, one of the lines that really stuck out with me was when she said her dad always told her, the older you get, the blacker you get. And for me, I took that, just meaning like, as you get older, it's like, you start to notice things you didn't notice as a kid, right? Like how people treat you differently, how you're perceived and whatnot. But I think when you're younger, you probably just like, don't have the language for it. You know, like you don't really understand that.

Speaker 5:
[34:46] You have a feeling. You feel it. You feel the like, the othering in a situation. And it's kind of like if we were to go somewhere and walk into a room and people are like, oh, hi, hi, welcome, welcome, welcome. But they'll stop and be like, can I help you? And it's like, it's a very intentional, like I need you to make to make sure that you know that you do not belong here. I need you to feel that in this moment. Or you go into a store and someone's following you around and folding scarves into a bin, which happened to be in Tahoe. Like, just have people following you around just over all the time. It does not matter. I could be, I could have gone to the store like this today and someone be like, do you work here? It's like, it's the idea that if you are in this place, you were here to be of service to me. And people don't even realize that they're doing it or that they're like sizing you up in a way that they're like wouldn't even imagine sizing someone up. And it's like with that statement of like the older you get, the blacker you get, you do become aware of it. And it's not like, oh, 18, 19, 20. It's six, it's seven, it's...

Speaker 3:
[35:57] That was going to be my question. Do you remember a time in your life when you were younger, when you kind of started to notice that shift and things clicked in a different way?

Speaker 4:
[36:06] I feel like I went through different phases because it's like I've been around majority white people. I've been the only black kid in class for most of my life. And so I remember my first best friend and we're best friends. I go to her house. There was always a weird feeling when I was at her house. And then one day, a black girl from Haiti moves to our town. And for some reason, my friend just really didn't like her. And so I kind of had to be like, well, I like her. But they would fight on this playground every day. And then one day after like five days of doing this on the playground, she calls her the N word. And then she looks right at me and goes, but you're not the N word.

Speaker 5:
[36:46] You're one of the good ones. Oh, they love that one.

Speaker 4:
[36:48] And that was my best friend, you know? And so it was like elementary school. You learn that. And then you kind of go to these phases. And now I think I'm in the phase of like, I think from the time when Trump got elected, the white women in my life where I was like having to side-eye them, because I was like, wait, what kind of white woman are you?

Speaker 5:
[37:09] It's like, are you a safe person? Are you safe? But most importantly now, it's like, are you safe for me? Like, I don't want my children to have to sit in a situation where they're being made uncomfortable. Someone is stroking their hair or asking them questions and making them responsible and be like, as toddlers and little kids, representatives for their entire race to answer weird-ass questions. Like, just talk to people. It's like, I just don't know what to say in these situations. Bitch, I'm a human. Talk to me like you would talk to another person. It is that, like, I think the issue is people get so afraid of, like, that label and being labeled that they don't realize that they are not hearing their friends. Like, if your friend comes to you and says, hey, like, this was hurtful to me, like, I just want you to know this is how this came off. I'm not attacking you. But that's the thing is that you have to couch it in so much language because that other person's feelings start to become more important. It's become less about the fact that, hey, you hurt me and more about, I'm not saying this. I'm not, and it shouldn't have to be that. It's a trust. It is, I trust you enough to tell you that you hurt me.

Speaker 3:
[38:23] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[38:24] Sometimes I just want to vent about it. I'm not trying to make a thing about race. I'm just trying to tell you about my Tuesday. My Tuesday just so happened to include all of these interactions that I don't want to go home and sit alone in or cry in, but it's hard to be able to voice that without somebody's feelings getting hurt or bristling about it.

Speaker 3:
[38:46] I know you've even told me with some of the moms at your kids' school, just how they perceive you, whether it's your hair or the color of your skin. It's just like I cannot imagine when you're just taking your kids to school, just to be judged. It's like you have all of the bitchy moms and whatnot, but that added layer, it's so unfair.

Speaker 5:
[39:08] It's like are you looking at me because my hair is pink, are you looking at me because I'm black, are you looking at me because I'm really pretty? There's a lot of options here. Sometimes I wish it was just that I was pretty, but then it's like you smile at somebody and they're sneering at you. Obviously, both of you know me as a person. So to have people grab their purse when you walk by or close the elevator because they don't want to be on an elevator with you because they're just scared of you when you are not scary. That's what the thing with Ciara also is, stop painting this woman as scary. She is the most fragile, gentle little flower.

Speaker 4:
[39:45] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[39:45] Sometimes whimsy, that's why everyone's like, whimsical black girls, yes. Let us be whimsical. Let us love magic. Let us love fairies and frolicking and games. Don't think that everything your opinion, based on exaggerations and stories and stereotypes that you've seen is who people are. Give them a chance to just fucking live.

Speaker 4:
[40:08] I would love for someone to really explain to me if they believe Ciara is a scary person. I want them to list off the reasons why they're scary. Because you know what's scary to me is a woman who could sit in my face, let me vent about a boy, laugh about him, cry about him, hold me, also have that woman also consoling me, and then turn around and be fucking him.

Speaker 5:
[40:31] And still consoling about.

Speaker 4:
[40:33] I'm like, that's scary to me. So I would love to know what their version of scary is.

Speaker 3:
[40:38] Literally, and it's like, why does one person get to be passionate, but then another person is aggressive? It's like, come on, I am very interested to see how this reunion goes down. Because it's like she shouldn't have to keep herself composed if she's feeling like she wants to say go fuck a cheese grater.

Speaker 5:
[40:57] But you know what I am grateful for? I am grateful that she will have KJ and Mia on the stage with her. They have also brought balance to the conversations that she's been alone in. To have that support of somebody that is backing you up, because people can hear your experience and they're just hearing a story. But to have that back up and it's like, no, this is actually a universal experience that so many of us have to deal with, depending upon our situations, our surroundings, what we're going through. And to just have a hand to hold and be supported in that. That's part of why those conversations were poignant. That's part of why I'm glad that she will have people. It doesn't have to be a raising of voices. It doesn't have to be anything.

Speaker 4:
[41:43] I think KJ is going to crash out the hardest. If it's anything like what he's been posting on threads.

Speaker 3:
[41:48] Oh my God, right?

Speaker 5:
[41:49] I love that little bean so much. He reminds me of my nephew. He's just such a little like, he's raised by women. He's like a certified lover boy.

Speaker 4:
[41:59] And yes, Ciara, where his big sisters are his big sisters. So he's like, don't play with my, I'm not down with this.

Speaker 3:
[42:05] No, I'm so happy that she has him.

Speaker 5:
[42:07] He hopped on a wankster beat.

Speaker 4:
[42:08] Yeah. And someone pointed out something very, I thought was funny too. When they met, meeting KJ, I realized that West was just cosplaying West. I mean, KJ this entire time until showing up in the house. Like it is, I feel like we don't know who West, and that's why also pissed me off about that conversation when he was like, when West was saying, I know more about your family's house in that situation. And I wanted to say, I wonder what she knows about you. I bet nothing. I bet you've actually never really shared anything of substance while she's been pouring her heart out.

Speaker 5:
[42:40] But he took her to his like, like remember that first season?

Speaker 4:
[42:43] But that's what he does.

Speaker 5:
[42:44] And they never did. It was like, you're taking her to the farm and with his family and all these pictures and stuff that's happening on weekends and sweet talking and dates that we're not seeing during the week, which we would see on the city. But like, I'm sorry.

Speaker 3:
[42:57] You guys gonna watch the city?

Speaker 4:
[42:58] I'm gonna watch it because I have actually enjoyed the like, picking apart even though like I crash out every day when I see it. Because now at this point, something is beyond happening between Amanda and West. I'm convinced by the time they're filming in the city. So yeah. Oh, I want to like watch it and see like how diabolical it gets. Are they going to talk about Ciara? Are they going to bring these conversations up and act and play in our faces?

Speaker 5:
[43:24] Like that was supposed to be the hard launch. It was going to be like in the city.

Speaker 3:
[43:28] Crazy.

Speaker 5:
[43:30] Not on Lindsay Hubbard's watch.

Speaker 3:
[43:33] There was another part that stuck with me after I read the article. It was about how sometimes when a relationship ends and you're given a reason but doesn't fully explain it, and there's this question that just like kind of lingers in the back of your mind and you can't really ask or won't get a straight answer to or whatever. Like in her case, I can imagine that question being like, okay, so was it timing with me? You weren't ready with me, but like now you're ready with Amanda? Or was it something deeper? Like did race play a role in that? And I think that's what makes it so hard for the other person when they might not even fully understand like their own reasoning. You know, like it's not always conscious. It could be more subtle than that. So how do you process something like that when you feel that something bigger might be at play, but like you're not getting that clarity?

Speaker 4:
[44:24] I don't think that, I mean, I don't think you'll ever be able to get the answer. So you end up chalking it up to the reason why is this. And you start believing that. And then unfortunately, you go into every other relationship with that belief because that's how you move forward. And like every time I do, I've dated mostly white men. And every time, you know, we kind of encounter like similar issues. And I've never felt like enough because I do feel like white men, I was talking to my friend about this the other day, when they choose to date a not white woman, they then have to, they give up the privilege of moving through life in a very easy way because they have to bring along this partner that's not going to have it. And that's hard for some of them because they don't want to give it up because who would? Life is way more easier if there aren't boundaries and friction and all of that stuff. But when you have a black partner or a non-white partner, it exists. And so, you know, I think they even say, though, interracial couples, especially black women and white men, last the longest. And I think it's because once you've passed that barrier and you're in it, you're in it for real, right?

Speaker 3:
[45:33] Yeah. There was another thing she touched on that I think applies to everyone, and it's the idea that women are blamed for not seeing who someone really was, you know? It's like if it didn't work out, it's like, well, you should have known better, you know? Like you picked the wrong guy, like couldn't you see it? And I feel like that's put on the women a lot of the time, but it's like the reality is people present themselves, how they want to be perceived and seen, you know? You're not always seen a good side. Look at fucking Randall Emmett, for example, you know? Like he was the life of the party, so nice, so generous. And then behind the scenes, there's all this shit. And like, yeah, people said, oh, she should have known better. It's like, sure, there were a lot of red flags in that one. But it's like, the women are always blamed when it comes to this. And I guess my question is, why do you think the responsibility gets put on the women to figure everything out instead of people just like being honest with who they are?

Speaker 4:
[46:28] Because I think the world just hates women.

Speaker 5:
[46:31] They don't want to take accountability. It needs to be someone's fault. The damn sure isn't his.

Speaker 4:
[46:35] Exactly.

Speaker 5:
[46:36] Because his mom told him he was perfect.

Speaker 4:
[46:38] Exactly.

Speaker 5:
[46:40] It's such a...

Speaker 4:
[46:42] His mom is still telling him he's perfect, I bet.

Speaker 3:
[46:45] Oh, my God. I mean, this whole thing too, you know, it's like a lot of what she's describing in this article underneath everything. It's the betrayal in different forms. It's not just the romantic betrayal, you know, but like the quieter kinds, like the friends, the situations, even environments where you start to realize like, oh, I'm not actually being treated in a way that I thought I was, or, you know, a way that you deserve to be. And I feel like a lot of people struggle with that. And I've even struggled with that in friendships and had to cut people out where I'm just like, you're, this is not good for me. You're not treating me how I'm treating you and how I should be. And when, you know, it's like there's history or love or shared experiences there. It's not always obvious where the line is with giving grace and protecting yourself.

Speaker 5:
[47:42] I think it's hard to face the fact that sometimes your friend hates your guts.

Speaker 3:
[47:46] And they're jealous of you. But it's like the way they project things, like it's just it's like like what Sutton said. It's like you're angry and you're not angry at me. You're angry at your life.

Speaker 4:
[47:59] Exactly.

Speaker 3:
[47:59] And it's like that can be true in so many different friendships where they're just projecting on you.

Speaker 4:
[48:05] Absolutely.

Speaker 3:
[48:05] And it's like, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[48:07] And it was clear based. I mean, that last conversation, you know, West have he basically admitted he had resented Ciara this entire time. And I felt that from him.

Speaker 3:
[48:16] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[48:17] And I think that resentment never died. I think he has been so angry that she has dominated his storyline for two seasons and he hasn't been allowed to just be the F boy that he wanted. And I truly feel like this Amanda thing just came out of like he wanted to destroy her in a way that was irreparable. That's what's so hurtful about that. He wanted to make sure that this was like relationship ending to the core. And it's disgusting to me. Like I'm disgusted with Amanda in a different way than I'm disgusted with West. West to me is just such pond scum. I just like, I see him talking. I'm just like, ew. Amanda, just the levels of disappointment and betrayal on just a girl level and whether she'll ever understand it, I just don't think that she ever will. I think this is who she's always been. The sad part is, it's the most dimensional she's ever been on the show, because I'll be honest, she's been boring as hell for nine, 10 seasons.

Speaker 3:
[49:23] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[49:24] And finally, she has some dimension. It's not the person I want to, she's disgusting, disgusting demissions, but at least there's, okay, I'm finally getting to know who you really are.

Speaker 3:
[49:34] Yeah. And she's the type of girl that you don't want to be friends with. Like even when she was like, watch my, look at my ass when I walk away or whatever. Who the fuck says that?

Speaker 4:
[49:45] It's not normal.

Speaker 3:
[49:45] That like, no, no. And like going over there, but then, what's her name? That new girl who was off for like a second.

Speaker 4:
[49:52] Yes, Sabrina.

Speaker 3:
[49:53] Yeah. Then Sabrina goes over and like cuddles up with West too.

Speaker 4:
[49:56] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[49:56] I'm like, what are you doing? And then she's like, okay, you go away and like, let me talk to her and they're like, oh, you're such a girl's girl. But I'm like, why is everyone cuddling up with West?

Speaker 4:
[50:04] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[50:05] It's weird. I feel like even with like Tom and Raquel, years later, there's still questions that linger and fans will like dissect interactions from previous seasons and people are obviously doing that with Summer House right now. Do you think and maybe it will be on the city, maybe not, but do you think we'll ever get the real timeline of when things started with the two of them?

Speaker 5:
[50:26] What did he say in that thing? He said February, but it's also like if you're looking at when they were grabbing hands in the hallway, that's July.

Speaker 4:
[50:33] Well, his wording was interesting in that one little statement. He goes, you know, we realize things got serious in February.

Speaker 3:
[50:41] So they were already casually, they were already.

Speaker 4:
[50:43] But then he goes, then it started in February. Well, which is it? Because you don't, an emotional cheating starts way before anything. So you're not going to convince me that this has not been going on for months and months.

Speaker 3:
[50:52] Yep. I mean, I feel like the emotional part started last summer.

Speaker 4:
[50:56] Absolutely. Show me the text messages. I want the deleted, show me the change or the signal. I know you got a signal chat somewhere.

Speaker 3:
[51:04] Uh-huh. Do you think this could have been going on for longer? And was that maybe a reason why West couldn't commit to Ciara? Because he had these like feelings for Amanda that he didn't know what to do with? Or do you think it was more new?

Speaker 5:
[51:19] No, I don't think it's all that. I think that a lot of this is saving face.

Speaker 3:
[51:24] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[51:24] It's you look back and people are always like, well, listen, if you're going to blow up your life, better make it count.

Speaker 3:
[51:30] I mean, they're blasted longer than Tom and Raquel so far. You know, a couple of weeks on them.

Speaker 4:
[51:36] Oh my God. It got a kiss cam moment.

Speaker 3:
[51:38] Okay. So that was on the kiss cam. And she's like, act like you like me. Does she not know how to be a ventriloquist? Does she not realize people can read your lips? You're just like, act like you like me.

Speaker 4:
[51:49] That whole day though, like you knew Ciara's glamour cover came out that morning.

Speaker 3:
[51:54] Diabolical.

Speaker 4:
[51:55] And I feel like, I personally think, they went and got tickets right after to that game. They were going to watch that game at home or in a bar. They decided to go to the game that night because that article dropped. You will never convince me otherwise.

Speaker 3:
[52:07] Has she always been a sports girlie? I feel like I've never seen her.

Speaker 4:
[52:09] She is not a sports girlie.

Speaker 5:
[52:10] The big thing is, it was always like, Kyle always wants to go out, he always wants to be at a bar, he always wants to be at a... He's younger than Kyle. Yeah, and still has like another like, so have your... Chef Rose level amount of partying left the head.

Speaker 4:
[52:25] Exactly, so like have your values suddenly change? So this isn't a big like issue anymore?

Speaker 3:
[52:31] Make it make sense. I mean, do we think they have a chance? Because the world's never gonna be rooting for them as a couple.

Speaker 4:
[52:38] I just think that it's gonna have to be like, you know, Sydney Sweeney and Euphoria. Like, I feel like it'll be a spite marriage. I feel like if they continue on, it's purely despite us.

Speaker 3:
[52:48] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[52:48] Because West having to publicly claim a woman to the world like this, I think, is his worst nightmare. Yes. But he's gonna have to just lean in. Because what else are you gonna do? Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[52:59] I feel like, too, like with Tom and Raquel, with West and Amanda, like, part of the... I don't want to say fun, but like, part of, you know, them having... It was like the secret, where it's like, oh, nobody knows. And like, it's just like, duplicitous. Is that what I'm making up?

Speaker 4:
[53:16] Secret sex is always the hottest sex.

Speaker 3:
[53:18] Yeah. But it's like, now it's out in the open. It's like, is it still fun? This is what you wanted, right? You guys wanted to be together. So...

Speaker 5:
[53:25] And they both asked, like, the, like, main partner about their sex life. Like him, that going back and seeing him, like, asking Kyle is like, well, like, I mean, are you guys, are you guys hooking up? Are you like... It's just like...

Speaker 4:
[53:38] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[53:39] Eww.

Speaker 5:
[53:40] It's, it's a, it's a power thing.

Speaker 3:
[53:41] We're counting that with Ariana.

Speaker 5:
[53:42] It's so fucking weird. It's a power, it's like, it's like a power trip thing. It's like a, like, it's...

Speaker 4:
[53:48] They also probably want to see, like, well, are we both sleeping with them together? Because I want to know if we're, you know...

Speaker 5:
[53:54] Right. I told you talking about this makes my blood pressure go up. Like, literally.

Speaker 3:
[53:59] I know, I'm not even going to look at what my heart rate is.

Speaker 5:
[54:00] It was like, high heart rate. Your heart rate rose above 120 beats per minute while you were sitting still.

Speaker 3:
[54:04] Let's switch gears, okay? But still, speaking of couples who didn't make it, Kiki, I know you had sent this to us in our group chat about Haley Duff and her fiancee, Matt Rosenberg, who have parted ways after a 12-year-long engagement. They got engaged in 2014 on April Fool's Day, by the way. They have two daughters together. And over the years, they've had like various reasons for not setting a wedding day. Baby, we're moving, whatever. But now, sharing kids, finances, lives, I mean, regardless of a piece of paper, with the judge or minister's signature or whatever, that's essentially marriage. So why do we think they never made it official? Like, do you think he had debts he didn't want to take on, commitment issues?

Speaker 4:
[54:50] I just think that like, first of all, I truly am a believer that long engagements are engagements that are never gonna happen. It's never gonna turn into a marriage. I think that once you cross a certain amount of time in an engagement, then just enjoy being engaged because that's who you're gonna be for the rest of your life, which is fine because I love like the Goldie Hawn-Kurt Russell relationship because they know they can walk away at any time.

Speaker 3:
[55:14] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[55:14] And that's why they choose to stay because it's like, I don't think you need that piece of paper. But I think a lot of people want that piece of paper. And if you are kind of sitting there waiting for that to happen and you've been engaged for over, I would say, five years.

Speaker 3:
[55:28] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[55:29] No.

Speaker 3:
[55:32] What point for you, if you were engaged, would you walk away if your partner was non-committal about setting a date? How long would you stay?

Speaker 4:
[55:42] I don't know if I would walk away. I would just say, maybe if we're not going to do this, then let's just recommit that we're going to just be in a relationship. However, we're going to do this if we have to put each other in our wills. I would set it up like we're still being each other's lives, and we know we're going to build together, then let's protect ourselves if we're not going to do the marriage. I wouldn't necessarily walk away.

Speaker 5:
[56:04] Let's set our expectations. So much of it is expectations. After a certain point, if you're just like, yeah, like, remember we got engaged, still engaged.

Speaker 3:
[56:17] Yeah. Do you just want the ring?

Speaker 4:
[56:19] Well, that's the thing because you're not watching Real Housewives of Rhode Island yet.

Speaker 3:
[56:22] Yes, I am.

Speaker 4:
[56:23] Oh, you are.

Speaker 3:
[56:23] Yes, that's what I said.

Speaker 4:
[56:24] I started that.

Speaker 3:
[56:25] So I was like, ladies are London or Atlanta. It's got to be one. I already was with Atlanta from the last season off and on. I've always watched that one.

Speaker 4:
[56:34] Alicia, she's been engaged for nine years. The problem is that they have a house, they have a daughter together, her name's not on the house. She has to ask him for money anytime she wants to buy anything. That's not okay.

Speaker 3:
[56:49] When you have kids with someone and you're going to say, even if it doesn't work out, I'm not giving you anything, what the fuck?

Speaker 4:
[56:55] Yeah. She's built her business. Exactly.

Speaker 3:
[56:58] You live in this house.

Speaker 4:
[57:00] Yeah. That's the part where it gets scary, but at the end of the day, it's fine. I know her family is like this tight Rhode Island family and they just want to see a big wedding, but if she doesn't need the wedding, then say that, but also make sure that your partner is protecting you.

Speaker 3:
[57:14] Totally.

Speaker 5:
[57:16] As the great philosopher Kim Zolciak once said, the ring didn't mean a thing.

Speaker 3:
[57:23] Statistically also, couples with long engagements over two years are less likely to make it down the aisle.

Speaker 4:
[57:30] Over two years? Wow.

Speaker 3:
[57:31] Apparently. That's what research says.

Speaker 4:
[57:33] I feel like it would take that long just to plan a wedding. Also, planning a wedding seems like my worst nightmare.

Speaker 3:
[57:37] But I'm like, two years is not that long. I would have been engaged longer. I think a long engagement is a good thing. Just give yourself some time. But it's like you're getting like three years.

Speaker 4:
[57:52] I think three is the max.

Speaker 3:
[57:53] But then it's like I look at Krystin and Luke right now. I cannot imagine them having a wedding anytime soon. But it's like they've been engaged for a year and a half. I wouldn't say if they don't get married in the next six months, they're not going to make it. It's just like they've got a baby. They've got other shit going on.

Speaker 4:
[58:09] Well, they might be just engaged for 12 years.

Speaker 3:
[58:11] Right. I don't know if I agree with that statistic, but I guess we'll see.

Speaker 5:
[58:19] I think it's just like easy for some people to be like, oh my God, here, like here's this placeholder. So you'll stop talking to me about it.

Speaker 4:
[58:26] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[58:27] But it's like when somebody knows what they want to do, they know what they want to do.

Speaker 3:
[58:30] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[58:30] It's like you go from, you're dating, okay, we're getting serious, we're going to take this year to plan it. You're going to have a breakdown about planning the wedding and hand the book over and let him do it. I mean, that's just the way things go.

Speaker 4:
[58:42] Let's be real. Reality TV plays a part in it because I don't know Krystina, but I get the sense that at the end of the day, she just wanted to have a kid. So she was just a sitting at home person. They would have had a kid, they would have lived together. They're on a reality show, they have a friend who has a jewelry store. You know what I'm saying? I think the engagement comes. Maybe when it wasn't necessarily going to come just because.

Speaker 3:
[59:03] No, literally. I think I even talked about this in my book. With Shay, that's what we just felt like when we got on this show together. We're like, okay, so season one, we're on the show. Season two, we get engaged. Season three, we get married by season five. We have a baby. We were planning out our whole life. If the show goes six seasons, we're like, okay, by the time the show ends, we'll have a kid. And like it just naturally when you're on a reality show in a relationship, you do take those next steps a lot of the time and maybe sooner than you should have. I don't think we were ready to get married. I was 29, that 29, 30 is your whole like Saturn return, which I just learned about recently. And a lot of people get married then and they shouldn't.

Speaker 4:
[59:48] Oh, interesting.

Speaker 5:
[59:49] Yeah, I think the great thing though is like, I feel like regardless if they get married or not, I don't think Krystin is going to do anything on anyone's timeline by her own. And I respect that. If she don't want to, like, no, you don't have to do anything for the audience. You don't got to do anything for the gram or for the anybody. If your life is happy and you were chilling, live your joy, baby.

Speaker 3:
[60:09] And there's one thing I love about her so much is she is just unapologetically herself. Always. She doesn't give a fuck. She does what she wants to do. She says what she wants to say. And I'm like, and this is why I love having you back on my TV.

Speaker 4:
[60:21] That's why Luke is not getting laid so far in the season. She's like, I am not having sex right now because I'm not comfortable with my body and I'm a new mom. So go jack off.

Speaker 3:
[60:30] Literally, like a normal human.

Speaker 4:
[60:32] Like leave her alone.

Speaker 3:
[60:34] Do not touch her.

Speaker 5:
[60:35] Your body, like you, it does not matter if someone's like, oh my God, but you look so good to me, but I don't look good to me. I don't feel good to me.

Speaker 3:
[60:43] And a man can't understand that. It's like, well, you're beautiful to me. I don't feel beautiful. I don't want to be naked on top of you. Like I don't feel good about myself.

Speaker 5:
[60:53] It is. And it's like, I think with my preeclampsia, I think by the time I had Ezekiel, I think I was maybe like 210. And it was just like, and for me, like my entire life I've been petite, like getting used to that, getting used to like, I have to wear different clothes. Like, what does this, what is dressing for my body look like in this way?

Speaker 3:
[61:13] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[61:14] And I mean, like even now, like I was looking at a picture the other day, and it was like a day from, I was like, oh, it's filling myself. But also like in the picture, like I don't feel confident in it now, but it's like to get back to like, they say it's like seven years after you have a baby to like even remotely start to feel like yourself, that's like per child. So it's like, imagine trying to deal with postpartum, all this shit, your dick is the last of my priorities. Like wholesale.

Speaker 3:
[61:41] I am so glad though that The Valley from the beginning has shown the postpartum journeys, because that was just like the biggest miss for me, season nine is that they didn't show any of the shit that I was actually going through that so many women could relate to. It was just like, no, no, who's coming to your birthday? Are you and Lala going to be friends again? And it was just like, it pushed me back into a friendship that I was not ready to reenter. And had there been no show after the pandemic, I would have never spoken to her again. But it's like, you're put in this position and it's like week one. I mean, I'm like 10 days postpartum. They're like, and now have a conversation, make up, resolution. And I'm like, oh, okay. I'm like in such a brain fog that I'm like, well, this is the only other person on this show right now going through the same thing as me. So I guess I need to find common ground. And it's like, it just forced me into something that I wasn't ready to accept.

Speaker 5:
[62:38] I would do anything to get out of this bra that I'm wearing. Like you're like leaking through your shirts and your conversations.

Speaker 3:
[62:45] Wearing diapers.

Speaker 5:
[62:46] I was in a diaper. Like listen, do you think like me and this baby are both in diapers. I too would like to go lay down.

Speaker 3:
[62:54] Yeah, literally.

Speaker 5:
[62:55] Like yes, look at these sexy high cut briefs right here. You want some of this?

Speaker 3:
[63:00] Girl, I had a diaper, I had Spanx, I had the corset, like all under my birthday dress. I could barely eat because I was just so sucked in.

Speaker 5:
[63:11] Then especially like post C-section, you have to wear like that really like constricting binder, like keep your scar together.

Speaker 4:
[63:17] Oh my gosh.

Speaker 3:
[63:18] I'm going to make you want to have a kid.

Speaker 4:
[63:20] Oh yes, right now. We're going to get knocked up right away.

Speaker 5:
[63:23] Don't worry, second C-section, they already have a line to go across. Like, hey, Duck, good to see you again. Remember me?

Speaker 3:
[63:31] Well, to wrap things up, flowers of the week. I'm going to give them to my boy Luke, who is running for Congress. Have you guys seen?

Speaker 5:
[63:41] Yeah. Luke Galvansson.

Speaker 3:
[63:43] We love you.

Speaker 5:
[63:44] Gull Bronson.

Speaker 3:
[63:45] Gull Bronson. I never could remember how to say his name. Then I posted his thing and I was like, Gull Bronson.

Speaker 5:
[63:52] Hand out syrup with your logo on it, your campaign stuff on it. Get the syrup, go and tap some trees, put some labels on them and be like, vote for me is a vote for a sweet future.

Speaker 3:
[64:05] Yeah. But I'm like, you know what? Good for you. You did reality TV, didn't all work out, but now here you are back in your home state and trying to make a difference in the world.

Speaker 4:
[64:15] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[64:16] I love it for him.

Speaker 5:
[64:17] Respectfully, he's going to be in a suit all the time.

Speaker 4:
[64:20] Yeah. Love that.

Speaker 3:
[64:22] Jack's Hole. I'm going to let you ladies name it. Name them.

Speaker 4:
[64:26] The only person it can go to is West. I don't even know if this is multiple weeks in a row, but his entire little mini statement on his podcast was dumb. At this point, I'll wait to see him again on the reunion because I'm so sick of seeing him on my regular screen every week. I just want answers. I want a timeline. I want all of that.

Speaker 3:
[64:48] Screenshot. What is it?

Speaker 5:
[64:50] Receives proof.

Speaker 3:
[64:52] Someone everything. Want it all. Thank you all for listening. Thank you ladies for being here with me today. Make sure you listen to Kiki weekdays on Radio Andy's Reality Check and find her on Instagram at The Talk of Shame. Catch Krystina over on Dropout TV getting into all things, Doctor Who, Star Wars, Vertical, Shorts, all of it. We will be back next week getting into some more Scheananigans. We will have Zach and Hannah here soon and that's all, folks.

Speaker 5:
[65:24] June June Hannah, June June Hannah.

Speaker 2:
[65:27] Thanks for listening to Scheananigans with Scheana Shay. Tune in next time for juicy updates from the world of reality TV, pop culture and more. Download new episodes every week on Apple podcasts, Spotify or wherever you like to listen.

Speaker 3:
[65:45] Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.