title 1235. Kim Congdon, Tim Butterly and CJ Bishop

description Kim Congdon, Tim Butterly and CJ Bishop join Luis J. Gomez at The Creek and The Cave studio in Austin, TX and they discuss the GaS Digital couples, why Luis is fighting CJ at Skankfest, Luis back to being sober, why Kim hates Kid Rock now, Kim vs Annie Lederman, Sabrina Carpenter getting heat for making fun of an Arabic call, the gay dads who made fun of their baby for crying for mama, the gay dads who assaulted a man interviewing them, the Our Three Dads Instagram page on so much more!
Air Date: 04/20/26
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Follow the whole show on social media!
Kim Congdon
Twitter: https://twitter.com/kimberlycongdonInstagram: https://instagram.com/kimcongdon
Tim Butterly
Twitter: https://twitter.com/timbutterlyInstagram: https://instagram.com/timbutterly
CJ Bishop
Instagram: https://instagram.com/CJBishopComedy
Luis J. Gomez
Twitter: https://twitter.com/luisjgomezInstagram: https://instagram.com/gomezcomedyYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/LuisJGomezComedyWebsite: https://www.luisofskanks.com
Zac Amico
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ZASpookShowInstagram: https://instagram.com/zacisnotfunnyDates: https://punchup.live/ZacAmico
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pubDate Fri, 24 Apr 2026 01:30:00 GMT

author Luis J. Gomez

duration 4625000

transcript

Speaker 1:
[00:01] Fill her up!

Speaker 2:
[00:02] You're listening to the G.A.S.T. Digital Network.

Speaker 3:
[01:21] Welcome to the show. It's the Real Ass Podcast. A lot, no, I recorded yesterday from Austin, Texas. I am here at The Creek and The Cave studio. Shout out to Rebecca for making this all possible. Shout out to Pat, the man on the ones and the twos, coming in and being the official Shannon for today's show. Happy to be here. Let me see your tits, Pat. I know what that means, yeah. I went from Dalton. Let me see those tits, dude. Let me come on your tits. Let's start our show with Shannon.

Speaker 4:
[01:48] Oh my god, it's been a while.

Speaker 3:
[01:50] It's been a while, yeah. She hasn't been laid in 10 years, though. It's crazy that...

Speaker 1:
[01:54] Is that true?

Speaker 3:
[01:54] I swear to God, 10 years, I would just, literally, if I was Shannon, she's hot enough she could just walk to a bar and be like, come fuck me.

Speaker 1:
[02:00] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[02:00] She's gonna get fucked.

Speaker 4:
[02:01] Why hasn't she?

Speaker 3:
[02:02] Because she's probably been raped. So let's get into it. I'm assuming she has a physical recoil from sex.

Speaker 4:
[02:11] The power hands.

Speaker 3:
[02:13] I'm assuming that. The idea of sex probably hurts her emotionally and physically.

Speaker 5:
[02:18] Is there any chance just being around figs so long has made all male beings unsexual?

Speaker 3:
[02:22] Maybe. Maybe that's what it is.

Speaker 4:
[02:24] Hasn't she been doing the show for about 10 years?

Speaker 3:
[02:26] More. Shannon's like an old school grizzled podcasting vet. Calling a woman grizzled is the most offensive thing you can say about a woman. This bitch is grizzled.

Speaker 6:
[02:35] You're so mean, dude.

Speaker 2:
[02:37] Luis makes all of his employees take a vow of celibacy.

Speaker 3:
[02:40] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[02:42] Dylan, Shannon, they have to either have not have sex or only have sex with each other, right? It's like the GaS Digital way.

Speaker 3:
[02:48] It is turning. It's turning into a everyone's dating. Everyone's banging each other. Everyone's does have the office.

Speaker 2:
[02:55] Yeah, it's all just like and Dom Romance.

Speaker 3:
[02:58] Dom's would have fucking just made out like a fucking band. Oh, yeah. He's so hot. And Dom is such a dork.

Speaker 2:
[03:04] Dom's the main character of GaS Digital.

Speaker 3:
[03:06] It's crazy. Everyone's like, what the fuck is going on?

Speaker 4:
[03:09] It feels like she loves him.

Speaker 3:
[03:10] She loved they're they're like they're because you know what? It's the other thing you see Sarafina here like, oh, wow, she's fucking smoking. She got big tits and a big fat ass and little tiny waist, pretty face.

Speaker 4:
[03:19] He just turned into Missy Elliott.

Speaker 3:
[03:22] But then you talk to her and you realize that she's a nervous retard and it's like it makes sense that she's attracted to another nervous retard.

Speaker 2:
[03:30] She got all her stats stacked onto one, you know, skill tree.

Speaker 3:
[03:35] She's a video game character. Stamina is way down, power is way down. Tits and ass are fucking straight up defense. Look. So look, we had a great show planned today. I'm very excited about the show. We're going to bang out a little bit of time here. We're going to get some tacos after this. You want me to get some tacos, bitch?

Speaker 4:
[03:57] I guess so.

Speaker 5:
[03:58] I'm glad he said that to you. I thought he was talking to me for a sec.

Speaker 3:
[04:01] You can get some tacos too, CJ. I want you to get fatter. Yeah. That's what I want.

Speaker 6:
[04:05] Why do you want him to get fatter?

Speaker 3:
[04:07] Me and CJ are fighting at Skankfest. This is my opponent at Skankfest.

Speaker 4:
[04:11] Why are you doing that, CJ?

Speaker 3:
[04:12] I love Kim. Kim is such a Puerto Rican ex-girlfriend. She just went, she looked you up and down.

Speaker 5:
[04:17] She hit me like an abuela right there.

Speaker 3:
[04:19] She was like, I don't want to do that.

Speaker 4:
[04:21] Do you fight?

Speaker 5:
[04:23] Recently, yeah.

Speaker 3:
[04:24] He just started training for this fight. I'll give you the quick story.

Speaker 4:
[04:27] Luis, it feels like you're picking on a Canadian. Don't be.

Speaker 2:
[04:29] No, the story is great.

Speaker 4:
[04:30] I asked.

Speaker 2:
[04:31] The story is great.

Speaker 3:
[04:31] Yeah, Tim is a part of the story as well. So first of all, anyway, Tim Butterly is here, Kim Congdon is here, CJ Bishop is here. Great show playing Real Ass Podcast right here on GaS Digital. If you love the show, if you're watching this on YouTube or iTunes or anywhere else, go to gasdigital.com, get the pre-release, uncensored ad-free version of all of our shows. Over a thousand episodes available on demand, ad-free and uncensored at gasdigital.com. Use the promo code real, save a couple bucks a month, support the show directly. Kim is just mocking me the whole time right now. But yeah, we're here in Austin. We're having a fun time. Kim's rolling a blunt. I'm three days off the weed again, Kim.

Speaker 4:
[05:03] How come every time you come to visit, you're sober? You're drunk as fuck for years and years, and every time you visit Austin for one day, you've changed your life, founded a new religion.

Speaker 3:
[05:12] The past three weeks, when we went to Mexico, I got high every day in Mexico, and then I just stayed getting high every day. I've just been a retard for the past three or four weeks.

Speaker 4:
[05:22] That's the best way to be.

Speaker 5:
[05:22] Keep doing that. That's good. I think that's good for your spirit.

Speaker 3:
[05:25] I give it a try, dude. First of all, also, I was training while high. I remember I smoked a blunt to the head, and then I just beat the ever loving shit out of Harrington. And he was like, dude, this is so disheartening. You stink of a blunt. So, yeah, like I've been getting, I'm a few days sober again, which is good. If you watched me on the podcast the past few weeks, I'm just not sharp. I'm not like in it. The best version of me is not getting fucking stoned. I know I get silly goosey sometimes, which is always fine.

Speaker 2:
[05:55] I think moderate Luis is my favorite.

Speaker 3:
[05:56] Moderation doesn't exist in my life. You're not any good at it.

Speaker 4:
[05:59] No, he can't. He goes extreme or nothing.

Speaker 3:
[06:01] Yeah, all or nothing.

Speaker 4:
[06:02] It sucks.

Speaker 2:
[06:03] Yeah, that's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[06:04] So you caught me on complete sobriety.

Speaker 5:
[06:07] On the nothing side.

Speaker 3:
[06:08] Complete sobriety.

Speaker 4:
[06:09] It's like when I went on tour with Bert and he was sober.

Speaker 3:
[06:11] That's insane.

Speaker 4:
[06:12] It's like every time I see the tour, people are like skydiving.

Speaker 6:
[06:15] They're like doing Tito's and they're in outer space.

Speaker 3:
[06:17] It's like shooting heroin in a submarine. Like, this is the best tour ever.

Speaker 6:
[06:23] I went with them.

Speaker 4:
[06:23] We were getting pillows at Target. I'm like, you need to drink again.

Speaker 5:
[06:28] You're supposed to be doing Blow with the Artemis II astronauts right now.

Speaker 3:
[06:31] We're going to do Asset and look at the moon from space. It's a Burt Crusher fully loaded tour.

Speaker 4:
[06:37] When I went, we were doing sewing classes.

Speaker 3:
[06:39] Yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 2:
[06:40] I opened for him in 2014 and he was not drinking that week also. I thought I picked up on that was code for like, I'm just not hanging with this dude. Because he was touring clubs so much.

Speaker 4:
[06:50] Such a comic thing to think.

Speaker 2:
[06:51] I'm sure they were all just like, bro, let's close out the bar.

Speaker 3:
[06:54] It's great, I went, I just did that.

Speaker 2:
[06:55] So Thursday night he was just like, just saying, I'm not drinking this week.

Speaker 3:
[06:57] Did that arena with Shane a couple nights ago, which was so cool. Bridgestone Arena, 20,000 people. Nice. Nashville. Thank you. And, you know, hold on, I wanted to bring that up. I got distracted before, I was like, why are you giving her a notebook? What did she think? Did she plan something here?

Speaker 6:
[07:14] So how many people were at the arena?

Speaker 3:
[07:16] Oh no, that's what I was gonna say. Shane, yeah, I don't get how he does it. Like, they do the show, they get, they're like hanging out with like the after party, they're like all professional athletes, like backstage. So like NFL players and hockey players, and like they're all like, yeah, Shane, you're the man. And they're all drinking. And he's already drunk, he's already been drinking since we got to the venue.

Speaker 2:
[07:33] He's drinking out of the Stanley Cup every time he had to.

Speaker 3:
[07:40] He's like, dude, this is Muhammad Ali's fucking glove, take a shoey from it. So, and then afterwards we go out on the town. Like I'm just so not, I did it because it's Shane and you want to have fun and party and fucking. But I mean, I was just like, I couldn't do this for more than two nights in a row. I'm going to fucking die.

Speaker 2:
[08:02] You guys go to nightclubs and shit?

Speaker 3:
[08:03] We went to just some bars. We went to Kid Rock's bar, which is.

Speaker 4:
[08:07] Can I say, Kid Rock's thing?

Speaker 3:
[08:10] Fuck Kid Rock.

Speaker 6:
[08:11] Kid Rock is a f***. Kid Rock, if you're hearing this and you're watching this, I think you're an absolute f***. It has nothing to do with your views or your political.

Speaker 3:
[08:21] No, it just sucks.

Speaker 6:
[08:22] Opinions, everything about you is disgusting.

Speaker 3:
[08:25] I remember Tony was like.

Speaker 2:
[08:26] I've actually, we watched the Bad Bonnie Super Bowl performance together and then I think it was me and Hans put on the Turning Point USA counter.

Speaker 3:
[08:34] Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.

Speaker 2:
[08:35] And I got to watch Kim have this realization in real time. She's never really like Kid Rock.

Speaker 6:
[08:39] No, I actually was a Kid Rock fan growing up.

Speaker 3:
[08:40] We were all Kid Rock fans. Early 2000s, late 90s. It was the shit. But he's a f***ing herb.

Speaker 4:
[08:47] He's just a loser.

Speaker 3:
[08:48] When he was in Nashville last time, he came to Story Wars and he was like, I was just hanging out at Kid Rock in his house that shaped like the White House. And I was like, all right. He was like, we were in the hot tub all day. And I was like, he was like, you wouldn't want to do that? I was like, literally, that's my nightmare.

Speaker 6:
[09:05] I would never want to see Kid Rock.

Speaker 3:
[09:06] We got invited to Kid Rock's house. We literally got invited. We opted to not go to Kid Rock's house. I would, that's not even a Kid Rock thing.

Speaker 4:
[09:13] Kid Rock's easy. He'll let anyone in his house, dude. He's a little slut for visitors.

Speaker 3:
[09:17] It's not even that I'm opposed to going to Kid Rock's house. I don't really want to go to anybody's house that I'm not friends with.

Speaker 4:
[09:26] That you can't be comfortable in. I don't want to- By the way, other people's stuff does not impress me.

Speaker 3:
[09:33] Nope, never. I don't like going to someone's house and like, make yourself at home, go get something. I'm like, I'm never going to make myself at home. I'm going to sit here awkwardly and I'm thirsty and I'm not going to say anything. That's my entire time at somebody else's home.

Speaker 2:
[09:46] Off my shoes. I'll open your chips, dude. You're cracking new beds? I'll crack the fucking scoops.

Speaker 4:
[09:52] There's not, there's, it's very rare that Tim and MJ come over and they don't just wake up in the morning with me.

Speaker 6:
[10:00] In a non-sexual manner.

Speaker 2:
[10:01] I'm taking over a couch. I've got some cool videos to show you. I actually, I will make myself at home. Thank you very much. Oh, I brought video games if you don't have any, by the way.

Speaker 6:
[10:10] I brought my three children.

Speaker 3:
[10:11] But going to somebody's home that's like really rich and successful.

Speaker 1:
[10:15] It sucks ass.

Speaker 6:
[10:16] I'd actually rather hang out in a poor home.

Speaker 3:
[10:17] It makes me feel bad about myself. Yes, I want to hang out with my friends. I want to go to a cheap shitty dive bar with my close friends. I want to go and fucking hang out and have a real conversation.

Speaker 4:
[10:25] I want to be able to spill on my friend's couch and he'll go, I could just buy another one of his couch.

Speaker 3:
[10:29] He's like, burn it up.

Speaker 4:
[10:30] 300 bucks.

Speaker 5:
[10:31] That's the spill couch. Don't worry.

Speaker 4:
[10:33] That's our spill couch.

Speaker 3:
[10:35] Anyway, I'll tell you what happened between me and CJ. We got a little bit of riffing off. We're good. So CJ, let me say this. First of all, CJ is a very funny comedian. He's been open for me a couple of times. You know, a very, very talented comedian. CJ was on a trajectory of just being invited to Skankfest and being a part of the crew.

Speaker 2:
[10:57] I saw a future in the, you know, the wider inner circle.

Speaker 3:
[11:01] Yes, yes.

Speaker 4:
[11:02] I'm starting to feel like CJ did something very wrong.

Speaker 7:
[11:05] It was crazy.

Speaker 3:
[11:06] It was not too bad.

Speaker 2:
[11:08] It's not so crazy that the story stops being fun.

Speaker 3:
[11:12] No, no, no. Exactly. It's not so bad that he's a bad person, but it's crazy. It's just one of the most biggest missteps you could ever do at Skankfest.

Speaker 5:
[11:21] You're going to hit me with the abuela look again for sure. It's going to be flowing.

Speaker 3:
[11:24] So CJ, but you know, I was open for him before it kills, funny comic, also a hustler who's like doing things. You come to Austin, New York, you're regularly, you're doing what you're supposed to be doing as a comedian that is talented. You are, you're just, I'm assuming, impatient because how long have you been in comedy?

Speaker 5:
[11:42] Like six years.

Speaker 3:
[11:43] Yeah, you're a young buck.

Speaker 5:
[11:44] I got two kids now.

Speaker 3:
[11:44] This is the age now, six to ten years, five to ten years.

Speaker 4:
[11:47] This is where I remember I said I was going to be famous.

Speaker 5:
[11:50] Yes.

Speaker 4:
[11:50] And you yelled at me and I cried on Melrose Avenue when I was two years in. I was like, in six years I'll be famous. He was like, you won't. And then I cried and I was like, you don't believe in me.

Speaker 3:
[11:59] No, what's going to happen is-

Speaker 4:
[12:00] I ran away to Mel's diner.

Speaker 3:
[12:01] Two or three of your friends are going to start getting TV things at this point and you're going to go, why is nothing happening for me? And you get really impatient. And a lot of guys at this point, they make dumb mistakes. They either go down like hard down a political route because they get a little bit of success with that. Like a Jamie Kilsean story.

Speaker 4:
[12:18] Or like whatever side that they can get.

Speaker 3:
[12:21] Whatever they jump or some guys do it.

Speaker 2:
[12:23] Very interesting to watch what people do with the first morsel of recognition that they get. And I've seen some guys, it's a total landmine for them. I've seen other guys, it's fine.

Speaker 3:
[12:34] Well, a lot of these guys do this. They go on Twitter and they get a little success because they'll start trashing Rogan or Tony. These are like six year comics, five year comics. And they're funny. And you're like, dude, this is the industry. This is the industry now. I understand if you want to have six red bar trolls on Twitter liking your thing, trashing Tony.

Speaker 6:
[12:54] As a comedian, it's worse to trash Rogan than it is the Jews. That's how real it is.

Speaker 2:
[13:02] Not only because he's where he is in the industry, because it's just like, yeah, dude, everyone's doing that.

Speaker 3:
[13:07] It's not even, even if you don't want to do Kill Tony or Rogan. Like, let's say you're like, I don't really like those guys. That's not my thing. What you're doing is you are Picking a side. For no reason, for there's no, there's very little upside in going, like Robbie Goodwin. He's a prime example of it. I love Robbie. Robbie's very funny. I invited him to Skankfest this year, but I've had a few conversation with him where I'm like, dude, I was like, are you a troll or are you a comedian? Pick one. If you want to be an internet troll, go be a fucking internet troll.

Speaker 4:
[13:32] I think I know why he doesn't like Tony, though. It's really funny.

Speaker 3:
[13:35] Oh yeah, because Tony was shitty to him?

Speaker 4:
[13:37] Tony told him when you're at Skankfest, he wasn't famous enough to crowd surf.

Speaker 3:
[13:42] That's hilarious, though. It's true. He did say that.

Speaker 5:
[13:46] People just let him down.

Speaker 3:
[13:48] You're just not famous enough, Robbie Goodwin. Oh, no.

Speaker 4:
[13:51] But to crowd surf.

Speaker 3:
[13:51] The Undertaker just power bombed me.

Speaker 4:
[13:54] Getting the light while trying to crowd surf.

Speaker 3:
[13:56] That's so sad.

Speaker 5:
[13:57] People looking up at him like, who is that?

Speaker 4:
[13:59] I don't know.

Speaker 5:
[13:59] Let him down.

Speaker 4:
[14:00] Why are we carrying this guy?

Speaker 2:
[14:02] Huff walk back to the hotel.

Speaker 3:
[14:03] There's guys like that. They go on Twitter. Then it's like, what you're doing is you're making it weird for people that do work sort of in this industry. We took the industry. The beautiful thing about all this is we don't need fucking agents, managers, TV, Netflix. We don't need any of it. It's nice to have things sometimes, but the reality is- The reality is I make more money than most of my more famous friends, right? Because I do shit myself and I hustle myself and I fucking created my own industry. And that's what guys like Tony did and Rogan did. And it's like, what's going to happen is you're going to just be- People are like, like, why am I going to fucking? People are going to not want to work with you because they don't want to associate people that are just internet trolls. Like, I don't want to fucking work with internet trolls. I want to work with people that are hilarious and they're trying to do fun shit. You're not supposed to like every comedian. You're not supposed to fucking want to be in every- That's fine. But like, it's like working for fucking Chase Bank and going online every day and crashing the CEO of Chase Bank and you're like, this is going to really work out well for me. It's like, no, you're probably not going to get very far in that job. So regardless, anyway, it's a big long speech for saying-

Speaker 4:
[15:03] What'd you do?

Speaker 3:
[15:06] I'm really good at vamping. So, I'm a professional podcaster. This is what I do, guys. So, CJ.

Speaker 5:
[15:12] You seem anxious. It's not that bad.

Speaker 3:
[15:14] Don't worry.

Speaker 5:
[15:14] There's no allegations in here.

Speaker 3:
[15:16] No, no, no, no. No, no allegations.

Speaker 2:
[15:18] I saw how bad it was.

Speaker 3:
[15:19] No, you saw exactly.

Speaker 2:
[15:22] I got to witness the descent into the Dark Knight of the Soul.

Speaker 3:
[15:25] How did you first hear about the incident?

Speaker 2:
[15:28] I ran into it immediately after.

Speaker 5:
[15:30] It was about four seconds after you walked away. It was about four seconds after you walked away.

Speaker 2:
[15:32] Above the naked rose.

Speaker 4:
[15:33] So, whatever happened, happened at Skankfest.

Speaker 5:
[15:36] Yes.

Speaker 3:
[15:36] This happened at Skankfest.

Speaker 4:
[15:38] Okay.

Speaker 3:
[15:38] So.

Speaker 4:
[15:39] Wait, should I guess?

Speaker 3:
[15:40] No, you'll never guess it.

Speaker 4:
[15:42] You'll never guess it.

Speaker 3:
[15:42] You'll never guess it, kid. That's like you try to be famous and say, here's again, kid. Try again, kid.

Speaker 2:
[15:50] CJ comes to Skankfest for the first time with his brother and another homie.

Speaker 3:
[15:55] How did you get a ticket even?

Speaker 2:
[15:56] They didn't.

Speaker 5:
[15:57] You just showed up. We had, I think you set it up.

Speaker 3:
[16:00] I set you up with a ticket.

Speaker 2:
[16:01] Maybe.

Speaker 5:
[16:01] Correct.

Speaker 3:
[16:01] Sure. Whatever it was. I assumed you got a comic pass like a friend of a friend.

Speaker 4:
[16:05] I think he's lying. Hold on. Pause.

Speaker 3:
[16:06] He could have.

Speaker 5:
[16:07] I can't remember exactly, but I think where I saw something.

Speaker 4:
[16:11] I know in a Canadian line.

Speaker 5:
[16:12] When I opened for you, we talked about it and you said you could get me like a regular, it's like VIP or whatever where you can go everywhere but the green room.

Speaker 3:
[16:19] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[16:19] So you got me hooked up with those for me and Dave.

Speaker 3:
[16:21] I think as I'm talking about this, I think him and his brother snuck into Skank Fest altogether.

Speaker 5:
[16:25] No, no.

Speaker 3:
[16:26] Regardless. It doesn't even matter. He shows up. He's not a comic on the festival. Not saying that he would never be. In my opinion, CJ is a guy who's on the trajectory to start doing shit, right? Because very funny. He knows people. He's hustling. He's doing his thing. Podcast. I see him at Skank Fest. I was up to see how you're doing. I don't even know what I'm doing. I get a call from Shannon. I'm dressed as Papa Shango. I'm fat, I'm high as fuck. Shannon's like, I'm here with CJ Bishop. He's saying that you said that he can have an artist pass to go into the green room. I was like, I never fucking said that. What is he talking about? She goes, he never said that he said. I'm like, he's right there in front of her. I was like, what the fuck? Then at that point, I'm looking for, I was like, when I fucking see CJ Bishop, I'm going to personally drag him out of the festival. I didn't even say get him out. I was like, I'm going to personally drag him out of the fucking festival.

Speaker 2:
[17:20] I'm going to throw him off the Ferris wheel.

Speaker 3:
[17:21] Yeah, I did. So you chime in now because now I'm, I got to find this guy. So now your perspective.

Speaker 5:
[17:31] I'm standing in front of Shannon and I go, she goes, he never said anything like that he says.

Speaker 2:
[17:35] I go, Mr. Gomez never said that.

Speaker 5:
[17:38] I go, all right, and just walk away. And then I won't expose who, but one of my assets helps me get into the green room after all.

Speaker 3:
[17:48] Tom, we know who it is. We're exposing. Dumbass fucking Tom. Dumb Tom.

Speaker 4:
[17:54] We know who it is. It's clearly Tom.

Speaker 5:
[17:56] I love you Tom. Yeah, so we get up in there and Luis walks past, and I know I shouldn't be in there. So I look up at the wall. This is cool architecture up in this bitch.

Speaker 2:
[18:07] I showed her a hard hat.

Speaker 4:
[18:10] He hides in an air duct.

Speaker 3:
[18:12] He stresses the village people. He's got an Indian headdress on.

Speaker 5:
[18:17] And Luis walks past me, and he just glances at me, and then snap back, locks on to me, and goes, you come here. And then he puts me in the corner like a little dog, like when they're misbehaving, and he goes, you are a liar. You're putting words in my mouth. You're making me look like a fool at my festival. I could kick you out of here. And he grabs my pass. He goes, you shouldn't even fucking be up here. I could kick you out of here right now. And I start doing like the Happy Gilmore, where I go, you're cool. I'm gay. I'm dumb. You're smart. You're handsome. I'm ugly. You're very successful. I don't really have a lot going on. And he's like, yeah, you're right. Shut the fuck up.

Speaker 3:
[18:54] I was so mad.

Speaker 5:
[18:55] And then he goes, he goes, I don't want to see you in this fucking green room again.

Speaker 3:
[18:58] It wasn't even him sneaking into the green room, it was him lying to Shane. It was a lie for sure. The amount of people that sneak in the green room, it happens all the time. It's the lying about me.

Speaker 5:
[19:07] Yeah, trying to trick.

Speaker 2:
[19:08] This is why she doesn't have sex, doggy.

Speaker 4:
[19:11] She has trust issues.

Speaker 3:
[19:14] Men lie to her.

Speaker 2:
[19:15] We need to be better as men.

Speaker 5:
[19:17] We're a collective.

Speaker 3:
[19:19] So, and now what do you feel at this point?

Speaker 5:
[19:21] I just feel an overwhelming, impending doom sensation that this has just begun. There's gonna be much more to this. And this will last not just through the weekend, but likely further on into my life.

Speaker 4:
[19:34] Try three years, honey.

Speaker 2:
[19:36] So I run into him afterwards at the naked rose.

Speaker 5:
[19:39] It's 30 seconds after.

Speaker 2:
[19:40] 30 seconds after he's bright red and sweat is like squirting off his head.

Speaker 5:
[19:46] Yeah, I have like stink lines coming off of me from fear.

Speaker 2:
[19:49] And he goes, I don't know, man, I think I just fucked up. And I was just like, what happened? He's like, and I'm looking at his brother and his brother's like, that's pretty bad. It can't be that bad. And he tells me how badly he fucked up. And I went, oh my God, it's over for you. How could you have done that? How did you? How has your judgment been so keen up until this very point? And you fuck it.

Speaker 3:
[20:14] It also could have been he could have come to me. I like you enough. I know that you could have come to me and be like, hey, dude, is there any way I can get on the green room? And I'm like, ask. I'll fucking get you a pet. Like it was a simple freaking out. Like he's a guy who I like and know it's not like just some fucking literally random fucking dude. It's a guy who I've worked with in the past. I've you know, funny dude. Like it was just so bonkers to me.

Speaker 2:
[20:39] So I was dude, I was like dry heaving because I was laughing because I was like, imagine, imagine the moment when you like right before you wake up from a nightmare after you've already done the worst thing possible and there's no going back.

Speaker 5:
[20:52] And I was like, that's you, Tim and Dave are screaming in each other's faces. It's the first day, it's the first day. He's here all weekend.

Speaker 3:
[21:03] First day is brutal, first day is just fucking brutal. Now I'm just giving you weird energy the whole weekend. Every time I see you, I give you a stink eye.

Speaker 5:
[21:11] I'll just see you look through the crowd and I feel like it's that scene from The Voice where the butcher's looking back at Homelander and I'm like, he sees me.

Speaker 3:
[21:19] Oh, dude. So he comes on, he calls in a legion of skanks, does a good job, plays, it's very funny in the moment and we ended up coming to the solution that in order for him to come back to Skankfest this year.

Speaker 4:
[21:31] He has to fight you.

Speaker 3:
[21:32] He has to fight you.

Speaker 5:
[21:33] I demanded trial by combat.

Speaker 3:
[21:34] But check this out.

Speaker 5:
[21:35] Because they wanted to ban me for a year.

Speaker 3:
[21:36] We're gonna ban him. But we're doing trial by combat. However, here's the stipulation. If I stop him in the fight, he has to do the naked roast on Friday night.

Speaker 5:
[21:49] Knocked out or dropped, can't get up or, you know, what is it, three knockdowns in a round?

Speaker 3:
[21:53] If the referee stops the fight. So if you run for me the whole time, the referee will stop the fight. Just so you know.

Speaker 5:
[21:57] Of course.

Speaker 3:
[21:58] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[21:58] I'm familiar.

Speaker 4:
[22:00] That's a threat.

Speaker 3:
[22:02] I can't. Sorry, Kim's getting wet.

Speaker 4:
[22:05] No, I'm not.

Speaker 3:
[22:06] You're misinterpreting this. Kim loves violence. She's... Your problem.

Speaker 5:
[22:12] Do you like violence?

Speaker 3:
[22:13] I got into an argument with Kurt Metzger and she was like, I'm just gonna beat up Annie Lederman now.

Speaker 5:
[22:17] I ran into the guy with the afro.

Speaker 4:
[22:19] That's not how any of this goes.

Speaker 3:
[22:20] You grabbed her glasses off her face and threw them in the street at the comedy store. Annie Lederman was like, Luis is being crazy. Kim's like, what bitch? She grabbed her glasses and threw them in the street.

Speaker 5:
[22:31] You stood on business for Luis?

Speaker 3:
[22:32] Yeah, she did. Kim's a writer.

Speaker 5:
[22:33] Respect.

Speaker 4:
[22:33] I don't even get a word in, dude. I can't even say my side of the story.

Speaker 3:
[22:37] Say your side of the story, please.

Speaker 4:
[22:38] Okay, this is what happened. Luis and Kurt had that weird thing at Brea Improv. Was it Brea Improv where Kurt lit you, but you were headlining?

Speaker 3:
[22:46] No, I wasn't headlining.

Speaker 4:
[22:46] You were featuring.

Speaker 3:
[22:47] I was hosting for Jay.

Speaker 4:
[22:50] You were hosting for Jay.

Speaker 3:
[22:51] And it was you and Kurt.

Speaker 4:
[22:52] But it was your spot.

Speaker 3:
[22:52] You were there too, right?

Speaker 4:
[22:53] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[22:54] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[22:54] But it was your spot time and he lit you during your time.

Speaker 3:
[22:57] Yeah, or maybe it was like a co-feature or whatever it was. Kurt just walks in the room and starts flashing his phone at me because he decided that he wanted to go on now. It was so disrespectful.

Speaker 4:
[23:08] It was crazy.

Speaker 3:
[23:08] In the middle of a room of Legion of Skanks T-shirts, Kurt's going like this, and I get off and I'm like, all right, cool. Then I see Kurt after the set, after his set. He's like, you want to go smoke a joint? I was like, I thought you were going to leave. Why did you light me? He's like, who's going to go nowhere? I was like, then I just saw red. I was like, you fucking me. Then we really got into it.

Speaker 4:
[23:28] They almost got into a fight. So this whole thing happens. That's not the video? No, no, no.

Speaker 3:
[23:32] Then they're talking shit on Twitter. That is months before.

Speaker 4:
[23:35] Okay. They're talking shit on Twitter for months. Then finally, Skanks does the comedy store. They're doing the Belly Room. They're talking shit to each other. Luis is saying on Twitter, like show up to Skanks tonight.

Speaker 3:
[23:48] No, we're texting each other. It's not on Twitter. We're texting each other.

Speaker 4:
[23:51] Come see me at Skanks tonight, pussy, whatever, blah, blah, blah. So then Kurt shows up. I'm watching this whole thing happen. I'm in the parking lot. I see Kurt pull up.

Speaker 3:
[24:00] Kurt goes to Kim and Dave. Literally my two best people in the world. Maybe to this day, two of my best friends. Still, to this very day, Kurt goes to Kim and Dave. He's like, I'm gonna fucking kill Luis if I see him or something like that. He starts talking wild shit.

Speaker 4:
[24:15] And then in front of like 20 fans, he goes like, I'm gonna kill, I'm gonna stab him.

Speaker 3:
[24:19] I'm gonna stab him like.

Speaker 4:
[24:20] And leave his son an orphan like he was. He's saying like crazy, crazy shit. Which is fine.

Speaker 3:
[24:26] Crazy shit.

Speaker 5:
[24:28] I gotta get him to write me some stuff.

Speaker 3:
[24:29] Yeah, no, no.

Speaker 4:
[24:31] It was going kind of hard. And at that point, I stayed out of it. I was just watching, watching the whole thing.

Speaker 3:
[24:35] And Dave calls me, he's like, yo, Kurt's talking, because Dave is a fucking real homie. Like actual ride or die, Brooklyn fucking energy. He's like, yo, Kurt's talking crazy shit. So just so you know, be prepared to fucking throw down if you see him. Like Dave's just like, and Dave's got it in my head now. It's like, Kurt's gonna start swinging. So I'm fucking ready to rock.

Speaker 2:
[24:53] I'm gonna run for president in 14 years. Oh, I would sneak him right now for you.

Speaker 4:
[25:00] So then they have the Leisure Skanks episode. Lewis throws the shot glass at Kurt. It becomes this whole fucking thing.

Speaker 3:
[25:05] Just throw a shot glass. People, let me ask a question. Because this happened last time I was on Austin's Drive. I threw a drink at that Afro guy, right? A lot of people are like, dude, only fucking bitches throw drinks. Really? I feel like throwing a drink is just like slapping somebody, spitting on them. You're like, fight me.

Speaker 2:
[25:21] I don't like any fluid transfer. I don't like spitting. I don't like throwing drinks.

Speaker 3:
[25:25] If it's there, it's there. I don't know. I just feel like that's where we've got to.

Speaker 2:
[25:29] I don't like my tears getting on them. None of that.

Speaker 3:
[25:31] My comp, my tears, my spit.

Speaker 2:
[25:34] These are all from my wife.

Speaker 4:
[25:39] My blood, sweat, and cum is all from my wife.

Speaker 3:
[25:43] Yeah, dude. Is it a bitch move to grab your drink and throw it in somebody's face to try to fight them?

Speaker 4:
[25:49] It does give housewife energy, real housewife.

Speaker 3:
[25:52] I guess. I didn't realize this. I grew up in a place where.

Speaker 2:
[25:55] It does give public freak out subreddit energy.

Speaker 5:
[25:57] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[25:58] Oh, yeah.

Speaker 5:
[25:58] I've only seen it.

Speaker 3:
[25:58] It made it to the public freak out subreddit. Both of these videos made it to public freak out subreddit.

Speaker 5:
[26:05] That guy's in town, too, by the way. Two nights ago, I was walking on.

Speaker 3:
[26:08] Afro, Afro Ninja.

Speaker 5:
[26:10] Yeah, I have a picture of him.

Speaker 4:
[26:11] Yeah, that's crazy. Well, listen, so they go both go back to the parking lot. They're about to fight. They get separated. This whole thing happens. Then Kurt and Annie go around.

Speaker 3:
[26:22] You got a picture with Afro Ninja. You should have him train you.

Speaker 4:
[26:25] Like a celebrity. That's so funny. This is threatening you.

Speaker 5:
[26:30] This is us talking about beating you up.

Speaker 3:
[26:34] Oh, my God. I saw I was I told him I said, hey, be ready to FaceTime at 4 p.m. So he's ready if you want.

Speaker 4:
[26:41] But that's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[26:44] You know, it's funny. That guy, I I would FaceTime right now. I would have honestly I would have I would have invited him to Skankfest. I would have had him be a part of the fights and he's a rapper.

Speaker 5:
[26:55] He's performing in town tonight.

Speaker 3:
[26:56] Can I tell you my problem? The kid's a cunt and he's not actually one of us. I can't invite people that are trying to fist fight comedians all over town.

Speaker 5:
[27:06] He agrees with you, by the way, when I talked to him, he goes, I was fucked up on shrooms and I am in the wrong.

Speaker 3:
[27:11] Okay, good.

Speaker 5:
[27:12] He goes, I tried to fight a guy at the bar right before and I said, I saw that video too.

Speaker 4:
[27:16] Also, I don't trust anyone that wants to fight on shrooms.

Speaker 3:
[27:18] That's crazy.

Speaker 6:
[27:19] How evil can you be?

Speaker 5:
[27:22] I'm like, get over here and kiss me.

Speaker 4:
[27:23] That's the most evil thing I've ever heard, taking mushrooms and being like, I want to fight.

Speaker 3:
[27:27] That is a bit, that's a very funny idea for a bit. You have to be so evil and depraved to where you go. It's like, dude, I want to fucking kill somebody.

Speaker 5:
[27:37] That's what happens to 10% of Ibogaine users is they just go crazy.

Speaker 3:
[27:40] I don't know what Ibogaine is.

Speaker 5:
[27:42] It's the thing Joe Rogan just got through with Trump.

Speaker 3:
[27:45] Oh, nice.

Speaker 5:
[27:45] Yeah, 80 to 90% depression cure rates, like a psychedelic thing.

Speaker 3:
[27:49] Then 10% you murder your family.

Speaker 5:
[27:50] I'm also Canadian. I know this, but you guys know it's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[27:53] So, no, but that guy, and I'm glad he's self-reflected at this point, but it's like, no, no, no, we both fucking sucked that night. He sucked a little bit more.

Speaker 2:
[28:02] Yeah, and that's the difference sometimes.

Speaker 5:
[28:05] A suck-off.

Speaker 3:
[28:07] No, we were going to meet up the next day and box in a gym, and then you were the one who told me, you were like, that's retarded. You were like, there's no upside. If I win the fight, I'm beating up a guy half my size. If I lose the fight, I just got beat up by a guy half my size. There's literally no winning. You got up early.

Speaker 2:
[28:24] That's crazy, dude.

Speaker 3:
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Speaker 4:
[29:25] I go out front and I see Annie and Kurt and they're both talking to the managers. Now, this whole time, they're threatening Luis, they're doing all this stuff, but now, yeah, but now that the podcast security's involved, they're both over talking to the manager and they're like, I don't know what caused him to do this. And that's when I was like, yo, don't act like you don't know what it was. And I was like, you guys were both standing there while he was threatening Luis, like you don't, it didn't come as a surprise.

Speaker 5:
[29:52] He was doing the big brother, like I didn't even hit him, I didn't say anything.

Speaker 4:
[29:56] He was doing the, this is what I don't like, when people do the like, they're just Puerto Rican. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's not that we're just Puerto Rican, it's that you said you were gonna stab him to death, and that's when I brought the fans over, I go, hey, like clap if you heard him say this.

Speaker 3:
[30:11] Kim's doing crowd work?

Speaker 4:
[30:12] I am, I'm doing crowd work.

Speaker 5:
[30:14] How long have you guys been watching this all vacation?

Speaker 4:
[30:16] And then Annie goes, Kim, why don't you shut the fuck up? And then that's when I took her glasses off and I threw them. I'm sorry, Annie, I'm glad we're cool now.

Speaker 3:
[30:22] I love Annie, I love Kurt, we're all friends. We're all like, I've been friends with Kurt, little known, I mean, people do know this, I guess, especially if you read my book.

Speaker 4:
[30:30] Annie did put her glasses on me two days later, she was like, you wanna see what they look like on you?

Speaker 3:
[30:35] I was like, yeah. Kurt is the first comedian that I ever met. Oh wow. So I met Kurt day one selling comedy club tickets for the New York Comedy Club when I was 19 years old. We both interviewed the same day, got the job the same day.

Speaker 4:
[30:49] That's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[30:49] Stood on the same corner. He was like, I'm a comic, like a two year comic from Philly. He was just trying to get into comedy and this is the job. He quit after one day. He couldn't stop a single person. He was like, hey, you wanna go to a comedy club? He was running away from it. So we just smoked cigarettes all day on the corner and I became the best at selling comedy tickets in the history of the game. And then I linked up with him. No, I was. Doug, I was really good.

Speaker 4:
[31:12] No, I know.

Speaker 3:
[31:13] And then I linked up with Kurt a couple of years later. I started producing shows before I started doing stand up and Kurt introduced me to everybody. Nate, Big J, Vecchione, DeRosa. It was all through Kurt Metzger. A little love fact. But Kurt's like my oldest friend in comedy and I have such a wild amount of respect for Kurt Metzger.

Speaker 4:
[31:29] Kurt's the man.

Speaker 3:
[31:29] Kurt is, in my opinion, if you're not considering like the greats, like the Louies or like the Davatels or like the Chris Rocks.

Speaker 4:
[31:37] What was the special White Precious?

Speaker 2:
[31:38] White Precious remains one of the funniest specials ever recorded.

Speaker 3:
[31:42] Top five specials, period.

Speaker 2:
[31:44] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[31:45] Period. Kurt Metzger, in my opinion, is in terms of that next generation, the best. Like the best.

Speaker 4:
[31:51] He's great.

Speaker 3:
[31:52] And out of everyone, because you talk about like Louis, Louis is obviously, in my opinion, the best comic in the world right now.

Speaker 4:
[31:58] I think he's the stickiest.

Speaker 3:
[32:01] David tells a close second, but like Louis is fucking just incredible. I think Kurt Metzger is the only comic today that has the ability to kind of do what Louis did, right?

Speaker 4:
[32:11] Jack off in front of women?

Speaker 6:
[32:12] Yeah, bring it on today.

Speaker 5:
[32:14] He definitely has that power.

Speaker 2:
[32:16] I wouldn't disagree with that at all. He's slowly turning me schizophrenic.

Speaker 4:
[32:19] No, same. I can't hang out with him too much because then I realize he's kind of gets, he's worried about life.

Speaker 3:
[32:23] Oh, it's like hanging out with a microwave. You're like, what is this doing to my head? There's no way this is causing cancer. It's fucking wild.

Speaker 2:
[32:30] Walking through the front door, my kids are like, daddy's home. I'm just like, yo, I just for an hour, I just heard about John Carey going to Antarctica to activate a god weapon and create a tsunami. It's like I got to snap myself out real quick.

Speaker 3:
[32:42] So anyway, I became friends with all these people. So you could fight people and be good. We'll be good after this. After we fight, we're going to be good.

Speaker 5:
[32:49] I know. I'm really looking forward to it. I do want to thank you for the opportunity to fight you. I think it's going to be really fun.

Speaker 4:
[32:55] You have to fuck them or fight them.

Speaker 5:
[32:58] I'm going to try to do both.

Speaker 3:
[32:59] It was what I said to Kim on our first date.

Speaker 4:
[33:01] And I couldn't fight then.

Speaker 3:
[33:02] She couldn't fight. She couldn't resist.

Speaker 6:
[33:04] I had no choice.

Speaker 2:
[33:06] Puerto Rican version of like when birds like display their...

Speaker 3:
[33:11] That was good in my dance.

Speaker 5:
[33:15] Puerto Ricoquing.

Speaker 3:
[33:17] So that was a good joke. It wasn't funny, but it was clever. It was clever. It was good.

Speaker 2:
[33:24] It's just sharp blue is all the weed, dude. You have nothing sneaking by.

Speaker 3:
[33:28] I'm fucking locked in right now. So you have been training, though?

Speaker 5:
[33:32] Yeah. My trainer, he's out back. I came to Austin with him. I'm training at a Burlington Training Center. It's a great fighting gym.

Speaker 3:
[33:38] So he's here right now?

Speaker 5:
[33:39] Yeah, he's here.

Speaker 3:
[33:39] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[33:40] He's a great guy.

Speaker 3:
[33:41] I'm going to beat him up. That's a really good in your head.

Speaker 4:
[33:43] I'm going to beat up your trainer. I lift my fist. He flinched.

Speaker 5:
[33:45] I'm scared of women for sure.

Speaker 4:
[33:48] That makes sense, actually.

Speaker 5:
[33:49] But yeah, I did. And there is another Canadian comic here. And I did try to send him to infiltrate your camp today, but you didn't get back to him. So.

Speaker 3:
[33:56] Oh, there was somebody that fucking.

Speaker 5:
[33:58] He was like, Hey man, I'm in town, by the way. Don't look at my mutual follows. But if you want to link up.

Speaker 3:
[34:03] Yeah. You know what it was?

Speaker 4:
[34:05] He's got sleeper cell agents.

Speaker 3:
[34:07] I need I need a place and I need sparring partners. I it's not just one or the other. So I might have gotten back to him if I had a place. But I'm going to go train with Jamie Kylstein tomorrow.

Speaker 5:
[34:17] I've been trying to get Butterly to do some sleeper cell stuff. He's like, absolutely not.

Speaker 3:
[34:22] But never, doggie. Oh, no, I think you're drawing a line between me and butter.

Speaker 5:
[34:27] No, I tried really hard.

Speaker 3:
[34:29] First of all, my family is my literally my son.

Speaker 2:
[34:33] I want my dad. You're trying to make me turn against my daddy.

Speaker 3:
[34:37] That's insane.

Speaker 5:
[34:38] I'll never turn against you.

Speaker 4:
[34:39] Unbelievable. If Luis is your dad, what does that make us?

Speaker 2:
[34:46] You're my stepmom. Well, you're my ex-stepmom.

Speaker 3:
[34:51] Ex-stepmom?

Speaker 2:
[34:52] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[34:53] I guess, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[34:54] That's so sweet.

Speaker 5:
[34:55] That means he looks up porno of you, I think, right?

Speaker 6:
[34:57] No!

Speaker 2:
[34:59] No, I look up porno of that because we have a complicated living situation.

Speaker 6:
[35:04] That's the truth.

Speaker 4:
[35:05] That's the way it really goes.

Speaker 3:
[35:06] Have you ever filmed porn together? You never did. Not once.

Speaker 2:
[35:11] Pat, make a note for Shannon. Pat, send an email to Shannon.

Speaker 3:
[35:17] So how's the training going? How often are you training?

Speaker 5:
[35:19] It's really good. I'm training four days a week. So I train Tuesday, Thursday at seven for about an hour. And then Friday is sparring. And then Sunday, I just do bag work and stuff. Cardio, stuff like that.

Speaker 3:
[35:30] Okay.

Speaker 5:
[35:30] It's going really good. I love watching you and Tim's fight. I watch it probably once or twice a week.

Speaker 3:
[35:35] Yeah, just to get the... Just so you know, I am way better than I am.

Speaker 5:
[35:39] I know. You look pretty good there.

Speaker 3:
[35:41] I'm way better than... I mean, then it was... I was just really getting into boxing. That's when I started training boxing.

Speaker 5:
[35:46] All the stuff you're posting right now, that's all fugazi then? You're posting shitty workouts?

Speaker 3:
[35:51] I'm just fat as right now. No, no. I'm a better boxer, but I'm just not in as good a shape. Right.

Speaker 4:
[35:56] You know what you need to do? You need to watch his most recent tapes and do what Jorge Masvidal did with the knee, where you just know what he's doing.

Speaker 5:
[36:02] Hands behind the back.

Speaker 4:
[36:04] Just fucking knee him in the face.

Speaker 5:
[36:05] Speaking of knees, which one of your knees is bad?

Speaker 3:
[36:07] If you head kick knocked me out, I would count it as a victory. If you threw an actual head kick that I wasn't expecting, you knocked me the fuck out in front of Skank Fest. I'm like, you know what, dude? Fuck this. This guy is going to the top.

Speaker 5:
[36:21] Third round, I'll point to my foot. You can give me the go-ahead.

Speaker 3:
[36:24] Yeah, no. Yeah, no, no. I'm just fat as fuck right now, but I'm going to be in the best shape of my life.

Speaker 5:
[36:29] Because you were right when we announced it. We stopped drinking for a while, I saw. And then the first time I saw you drink again was when you threw that drink at the Afro guy.

Speaker 3:
[36:36] Afro guy.

Speaker 5:
[36:37] I was like, I don't think you're sober.

Speaker 3:
[36:38] Blackout drunk that night. I was an actual, that was a problem.

Speaker 2:
[36:41] Oh, that was the night that we went to Copper Tank and we played on the punching machine.

Speaker 4:
[36:45] Oh, that was really fun.

Speaker 6:
[36:48] That was that night?

Speaker 3:
[36:50] Maybe it was one of the nights, but it was like that week.

Speaker 2:
[36:54] We did two nights actually.

Speaker 3:
[36:56] We went back to back.

Speaker 4:
[36:57] Shout out to Copper Tank.

Speaker 3:
[36:59] We didn't touch a pool cue. We just straight up punched a punching machine.

Speaker 4:
[37:02] I went last night on my way home. I did a spot and I passed Copper Tank, and then I walked in, punched that thing four times and then left.

Speaker 2:
[37:10] Every time.

Speaker 4:
[37:11] I'm addicted. I want one, dude.

Speaker 3:
[37:13] They're like 10 grand.

Speaker 4:
[37:14] I hit 800, 810.

Speaker 3:
[37:15] They're like 10 grand.

Speaker 2:
[37:16] They're so much more expensive than I thought because I had a grock trying to help me come up with a business plan to make top golf for those things. Like you go and you rent a lane.

Speaker 3:
[37:25] Like a punching range.

Speaker 2:
[37:27] There's like a global leaderboard. There's your party's leaderboard. There's really bad food.

Speaker 3:
[37:32] That's fun.

Speaker 2:
[37:33] Yeah, it'd be sick.

Speaker 4:
[37:33] Actually, just buy one of those and put it on Sixth Street, the punching ones.

Speaker 3:
[37:36] We're gonna have one at $10 a punch. We're gonna have one at Skankfest, at the ring. At the ring. Two of them, I think.

Speaker 4:
[37:43] Hell yeah.

Speaker 5:
[37:45] I love the one at Wild Gregg's because the side of it is just completely broken from guys fucking wanging their hands into it.

Speaker 4:
[37:51] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[37:52] Yeah. Was that Ari? Yeah, it's Ari.

Speaker 4:
[37:56] I can't believe there's a show going on.

Speaker 3:
[37:57] He's doing a screening of his storyteller show. Oh.

Speaker 4:
[38:02] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[38:02] So that's that. Let's do some plugs real quick. We got a little bit more show here. We haven't touched any of these stories yet. It's a great show. Let's get some plugs going. Kim Congdon, what are you plugging, girly girl?

Speaker 4:
[38:11] kimcongdon.com for show dates. Follow my Instagram. You want to see my butt cheeks, patreon.com/kimcongdon. I can't believe you didn't even hear that. I thought he was going to snap out.

Speaker 3:
[38:25] What did I do?

Speaker 4:
[38:25] Nothing. What did you say?

Speaker 3:
[38:28] I missed it. Damn it.

Speaker 4:
[38:30] I'm dropping a book in a few months, Blood, Force, Trauma. Keep a look out for it.

Speaker 3:
[38:33] There's a whole chapter about me.

Speaker 5:
[38:36] Is there?

Speaker 4:
[38:36] There is.

Speaker 5:
[38:37] The Lewis chapter.

Speaker 3:
[38:38] Nice.

Speaker 5:
[38:39] You open it up and just says, what's up, doggy?

Speaker 4:
[38:42] It just says, ah!

Speaker 3:
[38:49] CJ, what do you plug in, my friend?

Speaker 5:
[38:50] No, but seriously, they'll podcast on YouTube, Instagram, follow us, check out the Patreon. Got a lot of stuff going on there now. And CJ Bishop comedy.

Speaker 3:
[39:00] Hell yeah. Tim Butterly.

Speaker 2:
[39:02] Come to my GaS Digital Presents 30 Minutes with Tim Butterly taping May 23rd. It's me and Zac Amico splitting two shows, 7 to 9 p.m. Also, I'll be in Tacoma Comedy Club, June 19th and 20th. And apparently, I'm headlining the Joke World Festival.

Speaker 3:
[39:20] Here you are.

Speaker 4:
[39:21] This August. yeah.

Speaker 2:
[39:23] I'm so happy, I'm so pleased to announce that I'll be making the jump from underrated to overrated this August. timbutterly.com for everything. Check out my podcast. And wow, I can't believe I'm on RAP right now. This is the best.

Speaker 3:
[39:37] I know. I miss you, dude.

Speaker 2:
[39:38] This really, RAP really changed my life, man.

Speaker 3:
[39:40] You're a fucking star.

Speaker 2:
[39:41] Everything really started clicking to place for me.

Speaker 3:
[39:44] Come see me live on the road, guys. The Rattle Me This Tour, coming to City New York. I'm in Canada next weekend, St. Catharines, Ontario, Toronto the week after. They're close, right?

Speaker 5:
[39:51] Yeah, yeah. They're 45 minutes.

Speaker 3:
[39:53] Terrible booking.

Speaker 5:
[39:55] There's enough people though that you should be able to fill out pretty good.

Speaker 3:
[39:57] Let's see. We'll see what happens. And then I've got a bunch of other stuff. Fort Myers, Florida is coming up. Netflix is a joke festival. We're doing three story war shows and a bunch of other stuff. So it's going to be a blast. Go to my website, lewisofskanks.com. Grab tickets for all those shows. And more, subscribe to GaS Digital. Buy my book, Knives and Spoons, right now on Amazon or at Barnes and Noble. And get Skank Fest tickets. If you haven't yet, this is premiering 4 p.m. on GaS Digital. I am hoping that all access passes are already sold out. So go get your single day passes. Don't get your single day passes, and...

Speaker 6:
[40:35] Now put your hands up.

Speaker 3:
[40:37] I hate it. I really hate it. Check out all the other pods that I do. Sign up for my mailing list. Do all that stuff. And that is that. Let's talk about some of these stories. I got some stories here that I wanted to get to. I sent so many links. We haven't touched any of these fucking links yet.

Speaker 4:
[40:52] He likes to touch a link.

Speaker 3:
[40:53] I do like to touch a link.

Speaker 5:
[40:55] Little link on link action.

Speaker 3:
[40:56] Did you... So, Sabrina Carpenter.

Speaker 4:
[41:00] Oh, God.

Speaker 3:
[41:00] What?

Speaker 4:
[41:01] It's just all your fetishes.

Speaker 3:
[41:02] What?

Speaker 4:
[41:03] Okay, go ahead.

Speaker 3:
[41:04] It's not a fetish. First of all, she's an adult.

Speaker 5:
[41:06] It's a kink.

Speaker 3:
[41:07] Let me say this right now. She's a full-fledged adult.

Speaker 2:
[41:09] Sure.

Speaker 3:
[41:12] She apologizes after mocking an Arabic call.

Speaker 2:
[41:16] She looks like a Dolly Parton prequel.

Speaker 3:
[41:18] She... I'm not even like, her face isn't even that pretty. It's just her whole...

Speaker 5:
[41:24] She could be Bonnie Blue's sister.

Speaker 3:
[41:26] Dude, her whole thing.

Speaker 4:
[41:27] Yeah, she could.

Speaker 3:
[41:27] This little tiny girl who just wears, she wears just like bathing suits and fucking...

Speaker 4:
[41:32] I don't like the way you say tiny girl.

Speaker 3:
[41:33] What?

Speaker 5:
[41:34] And then bathing suits right after, yeah.

Speaker 3:
[41:36] She's a tiny girl.

Speaker 5:
[41:37] Tiny girls in bathing suits.

Speaker 3:
[41:38] She's 26 years old. Actually, try to find a picture of her and Taylor Swift performing on stage together. You'll never be less attracted to Taylor Swift when you watch her dancing next to Sabrina Carpenter, who's just like, finally like, yay, we're fucking girls. And then Taylor Swift's this big fucking draft bitch. She's so devoid of sexuality, dude. It's crazy.

Speaker 5:
[41:59] She's like the gangly spider from Legion.

Speaker 3:
[42:01] Just, oh my god. You gotta see if there's a video of them performing. Cause there's like one where it's like, it looks like she's called a child up on stage. Yeah, it's pretty fucking crazy. Yeah, I think that's the one. Yeah, espresso performance.

Speaker 4:
[42:13] You know the performance.

Speaker 3:
[42:15] Look at this. Look at this. It's like a giant fucking giraffe next to a hot little angel. It's fucking retarded. Anyway, so pull up the video of Sabrina Carpenter.

Speaker 2:
[42:31] Sabrina Carpenter and her divorced aunt.

Speaker 3:
[42:34] Sabrina Carpenter in hot water, in hot water right now apparently, because she mocked this girl's Arab call. Pull up the video of her doing it. The girl's doing like whatever they do when they're, I think, murdering infidels.

Speaker 5:
[42:50] She was just singing man child.

Speaker 6:
[42:51] Man child, la, la, la, la.

Speaker 4:
[42:53] Wait, who is? Wait.

Speaker 3:
[42:55] Oh, you got headphones.

Speaker 4:
[42:56] Oh, it is for reaction.

Speaker 3:
[42:58] Listen, put your headphones on, Kim. Yeah, rewind it to the beginning. Rewind it to the beginning.

Speaker 1:
[43:05] Is that what you're doing?

Speaker 2:
[43:15] It's my culture.

Speaker 6:
[43:16] It's my culture.

Speaker 2:
[43:18] Hey, it's a call!

Speaker 1:
[43:19] It's a call! A celebration!

Speaker 6:
[43:21] Is this Burning Man? What's going on?

Speaker 2:
[43:23] Is that what you're doing?

Speaker 3:
[43:26] I also hate that sound. It sounds very un-Christian.

Speaker 2:
[43:30] Whatever that sound is. Stop mocking Muslim people. We're not supposed to do that anymore.

Speaker 4:
[43:36] She's being a bitch.

Speaker 2:
[43:37] She's doing Team America.

Speaker 4:
[43:39] Yeah, she's being a bitch.

Speaker 3:
[43:40] Don't hate her, Kim.

Speaker 4:
[43:41] Okay, this is what I'm thinking. This person is so happy to be there in their culture. This is the way they show happiness. Yeah, that's what you do to try to get women too.

Speaker 5:
[43:52] That's Luis' culture.

Speaker 4:
[43:54] That's your cat call. So I don't know why you're saying it's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[43:56] What I'm trying to fuck a turkey. That's the sound that I make.

Speaker 4:
[43:59] And she knows it wasn't supposed to be offended. She's trying to be a bitch about it.

Speaker 3:
[44:04] No, I think she was confused in a moment. This is what happened.

Speaker 4:
[44:07] You think she's confused in this moment?

Speaker 3:
[44:09] You think that, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[44:10] I need you to play it from the beginning.

Speaker 6:
[44:11] I need you to look at her micro expressions.

Speaker 3:
[44:13] Where is she?

Speaker 4:
[44:15] You think she's confused genuinely?

Speaker 3:
[44:17] Yes, it's a weird sound.

Speaker 4:
[44:18] She looks offended there, not confused.

Speaker 5:
[44:20] Where is this, too?

Speaker 3:
[44:21] Is this Coachella? I don't know, where was this performance at? Do we know, Pat? It was Coachella.

Speaker 4:
[44:25] Right there, I don't see confused.

Speaker 6:
[44:26] I see offended.

Speaker 3:
[44:27] You know what you're doing? I don't like it. Yeah, Sabrina, let her know. Let her know, Sabrina, you angel.

Speaker 6:
[44:39] That's your culture, is yodeling?

Speaker 3:
[44:42] She called it yodeling. It's so disrespectful. Is this Burning Man? What's going on? She's funny.

Speaker 5:
[44:48] Do a lot of Arabic people go to Burning Man?

Speaker 4:
[44:51] It's all right.

Speaker 3:
[44:53] She had an issue with apology.

Speaker 2:
[44:55] Weird noise people go to Burning Man.

Speaker 3:
[44:57] If you were performing and some Arab bitch just started yodeling while you were on stage, going la la la la la la la, you'd be like, that's fucking insane behavior.

Speaker 5:
[45:07] She's like, I'm doing that because I think you're funny, Kim.

Speaker 3:
[45:10] That's crazy. That's nuts.

Speaker 5:
[45:11] You're crushing.

Speaker 4:
[45:12] Yeah, you're right. I would probably say worse things than you. I would probably say worse things than you.

Speaker 3:
[45:18] I don't like it.

Speaker 2:
[45:20] That's what I don't like is clearly she has, she never has to hear or see or smell anything that displeases her. And for two seconds on stage, the line got crossed.

Speaker 3:
[45:31] She was like, I'm hearing a sound that I've never heard that I don't like.

Speaker 6:
[45:34] I don't like it. Stop it.

Speaker 4:
[45:37] Are you yodeling?

Speaker 3:
[45:38] I'll tell you right now.

Speaker 2:
[45:38] I'd love to fart in an elevator with her.

Speaker 3:
[45:40] She just-

Speaker 4:
[45:41] I love to crop dust hot chicks. It's one of my favorite things to do. Yeah, I'll go. Yeah, I will. If I see a real snobby group, then they're not smiling and they're all like that. I'll just go crop dust.

Speaker 5:
[45:52] And you're undercover too. They don't expect it coming up from there.

Speaker 4:
[45:54] They don't know it's me.

Speaker 3:
[45:55] Have you ever seen a Sabrina Carpenter concert?

Speaker 4:
[46:00] Yeah, they're sexual.

Speaker 3:
[46:01] Well, they're very sexual. She's very sexual. She just danced around. She's always wearing just like...

Speaker 4:
[46:05] She's always talking about which position to fuck her in.

Speaker 3:
[46:07] Oh, yeah. It's great. Good for her. God bless her. But if you're like a 16-year-old girl going to Sabrina Carpenter concert, it looks like heaven. It looks like the most fun you'll ever have in your entire life.

Speaker 4:
[46:19] Luis really wants to go to a concert.

Speaker 3:
[46:20] Doggie, if you're...

Speaker 5:
[46:22] All those 16-year-old girls are so happy.

Speaker 3:
[46:23] Doggie, if we were 16-year-old girls, dude, watching Sabrina Carpenter at Coachella, we're just like, this is the fucking greatest ever life. It looks so fun.

Speaker 2:
[46:32] My life's going to be like, when everything works out for me.

Speaker 1:
[46:35] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[46:36] Nothing could ever go wrong.

Speaker 3:
[46:38] Literally, it's like 16-year-old girls being like, we're going to live forever.

Speaker 6:
[46:42] Life is the best.

Speaker 1:
[46:43] Girl, power.

Speaker 3:
[46:45] You're a legend.

Speaker 6:
[46:46] You're a legend.

Speaker 3:
[46:48] They're so happy, dude.

Speaker 6:
[46:50] I'm a legend.

Speaker 2:
[46:51] Taking pills from strangers.

Speaker 3:
[46:53] I've never seen happier people than young girls watching Sabrina Carpenter. It's just pure fucking unadulterated joy. Unadulterated, meaning she's not an adult. But yeah, so that's my, it's a new thing. She's in my algorithm. My entire algorithm is Sabrina Carpenter now.

Speaker 2:
[47:11] I've completely shut her out. I've boxed her out.

Speaker 4:
[47:13] I've never seen her or hear about her.

Speaker 3:
[47:15] I watched one video of her and then I was on it for a minute, and then it just came another one, and then another one. Now, it's like everything.

Speaker 2:
[47:22] She does literally nothing for me.

Speaker 3:
[47:24] Does nothing for you?

Speaker 2:
[47:25] Nothing.

Speaker 4:
[47:26] I don't think she's trailing. I mean, I think she's pretty. She's like a beautiful girl, but I wouldn't go like.

Speaker 2:
[47:33] On paper, 10 out of 10, it just does absolutely nothing for me.

Speaker 3:
[47:36] Her face isn't even like, I'm not calling like, oh my god, that's so beautiful.

Speaker 2:
[47:38] Right.

Speaker 3:
[47:39] There's just something.

Speaker 2:
[47:39] But she's also not doing anything where I'm just like, now hold on a second.

Speaker 5:
[47:43] Yeah, me neither. I've never seen that gyration. Yeah, he's not activating.

Speaker 3:
[47:47] You guys are disrespecting my girl Sabrina.

Speaker 2:
[47:50] I mean, I'm not in the same camp.

Speaker 5:
[47:52] My daughter is still young enough that I can look at that.

Speaker 3:
[47:54] You have a daughter?

Speaker 5:
[47:55] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[47:55] I didn't know you had a daughter.

Speaker 5:
[47:56] Yeah, nine months old now. Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[47:57] Good for you.

Speaker 5:
[47:58] Thank you, doggy.

Speaker 3:
[47:59] And you lied to me. It's gang. You're an adult with a kid. A lying dad. A lying dad is nuts. That's crazy.

Speaker 6:
[48:06] What, you have kids that lie with a baby?

Speaker 5:
[48:08] I'm not going to be like, hey, by the way, your mom said I didn't have to change your diaper, so I can just go ahead.

Speaker 3:
[48:13] Yeah, no. A lying dad is a crazy thing. So one thing that happens when you become a father is you stop lying. You're like, well, I got to be honest for the world, though. I'm teaching kids that live.

Speaker 2:
[48:22] Yeah, true.

Speaker 3:
[48:23] Yeah. So yeah, anyway, so Sabrina Carpenter, that's my girl now. We're going to keep our eyes on her. We are? Yeah, we are.

Speaker 4:
[48:31] Do we have to? Can you just do it? Can you keep your eye?

Speaker 2:
[48:35] Shannon was new with Sabrina Carpenter this week.

Speaker 4:
[48:39] Does the carpenter match the drapes, the new segment?

Speaker 3:
[48:42] There's another new thing that's kind of trending right now, which is like, I saw two different videos with Gay Dads. Gay Dads is a new thing. It's a new spicy topic right now, Gay Dads, right?

Speaker 4:
[48:53] Gay Dads.

Speaker 3:
[48:55] And there's two videos. I think I'll do the first one. All right, let's, and I'll preface this right now. I'll let you know, I'm going to be defending gays in this topic.

Speaker 2:
[49:07] I have a channel to send you.

Speaker 5:
[49:08] Is it? Okay.

Speaker 2:
[49:09] I want to see what you got first.

Speaker 5:
[49:10] I think I know what you're talking about, Tim.

Speaker 3:
[49:11] So there's two guys. The first video is the two guys that mocked the baby for asking for its mama.

Speaker 1:
[49:19] No, I need to see that.

Speaker 4:
[49:20] That's so funny.

Speaker 1:
[49:22] Play that shit.

Speaker 3:
[49:23] So I'll set it up first. So there's two gay guys. They had a surrogate mom, right? They paid some bitch to carry the baby for them. They got the baby on the lap and you'll see what happens in the video.

Speaker 4:
[49:33] But I think you already spoiled it.

Speaker 3:
[49:36] No, I didn't because you'll see the way it goes down. But is it weird for gay guys to adopt kids?

Speaker 2:
[49:45] Yes.

Speaker 3:
[49:45] Unquestionably. Unquestionably. But it's like, I don't really give a fuck about other people's shit. I don't care. I don't care what you do with your dad.

Speaker 4:
[49:55] Wait, you said it's weird for gay guys to adopt kids?

Speaker 3:
[49:57] Yes. I think it's weird.

Speaker 4:
[49:59] I think there's just so many kids.

Speaker 3:
[50:00] I think there. Yes. Well, that's the other side of it. It's like there's also a bunch of fucking fucked up abusive mothers. My mom would punch me in the face for spilling a glass of milk. A gay dad would have been better for me than my fucking psycho bitch mother, unquestionably. Unquestionably. The problem with gay dads and gay moms and all this is you're indoctrinating these kids to that lifestyle before. No, but it's true. They start to think of that as being the norm and it's not. It is a sidestep from God's plan. That's okay. No, I'm a sidestep from God's plan. Nobody wanted anyone to act this way. I'm not judging fucking anybody.

Speaker 2:
[50:33] They got plans from Puerto Ricans. That's crazy.

Speaker 3:
[50:37] It's a nutty thing. But I mean, objectively speaking, I think it's a little bit confusing for a little kid. However, if there's a kid who needs to get adopted and he needs a fucking home, like, you know.

Speaker 2:
[50:48] Oh my God. One of the gay dad's last names is Mick Anel. That's not real.

Speaker 3:
[50:55] Mick Anel is so funny.

Speaker 6:
[50:57] No, that's not real, Mick Anel.

Speaker 2:
[51:01] And how would you say the boy was molested? The way my family always has, Mick Anel.

Speaker 3:
[51:09] Sorry, so pull up the video.

Speaker 5:
[51:10] Shane Mick Anel and Jono Suck.

Speaker 2:
[51:12] Proud to be a Mick Anel. Hey, hey, who do you want, Dada or Pop? Wow, this is actually the saddest thing I've ever seen. Do you want mama or do you want two really weird gay guys? Forever, by the way.

Speaker 3:
[51:38] Mick Anel-y or Mick Penis. You got to pick one.

Speaker 2:
[51:41] Do you want mama or Papa Mick Anel-y?

Speaker 7:
[51:46] Mama or Papa Mick Anel-y?

Speaker 2:
[51:48] He wants mama. Well, there is no mama. There's only Papa Mick Anel-y.

Speaker 4:
[51:53] When there's only Papa Mick Anel-y, that's a tough choice.

Speaker 3:
[51:58] Give me a favor, please.

Speaker 6:
[51:59] Mama's not here.

Speaker 3:
[52:01] Send Shannon the name of the title of the episode, Papa Mick Anel-y.

Speaker 6:
[52:05] Papa Mick Anel-y is so crazy.

Speaker 2:
[52:08] We have mama at home. Mama at home, Papa Mick Anel-y.

Speaker 3:
[52:12] Go ahead.

Speaker 2:
[52:14] Do you want dada?

Speaker 1:
[52:15] Do you want papa?

Speaker 2:
[52:25] Should we just throw him on the ground as hard as we can? What do we do? Oh. Bro, do you understand what happens when you sever the connection between a boy and his mother, even at that age, even the day that they're born?

Speaker 3:
[52:44] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[52:45] The trauma that it creates in a boy's mind, and you're sitting there laughing in his face, when the entire world, as his brain is prepared to perceive it, is being exploded. And you're going, he wants mama. Well, there's no mama here.

Speaker 3:
[53:00] There ain't no mama here.

Speaker 2:
[53:01] There's two dads, and one of them is Mick Anelay.

Speaker 3:
[53:05] Now here, suck on my tit.

Speaker 2:
[53:06] Now get used to it.

Speaker 5:
[53:07] He's just looking for comfort. They're like, nope, nothing like that.

Speaker 4:
[53:11] Mama's gone.

Speaker 6:
[53:12] Say a little prayer for you.

Speaker 3:
[53:15] He's like, oh, he looks hungry.

Speaker 4:
[53:18] Oh no.

Speaker 7:
[53:20] Oh, he's hungry, he's so hungry.

Speaker 3:
[53:22] Poor little baby.

Speaker 4:
[53:26] I don't like that.

Speaker 2:
[53:28] Me either, Kim. That's the point.

Speaker 3:
[53:30] I agree that there's some weirdness to it. I agree that, you know, specifically the affection of a baby's mom holds a different level of value. However, you know, they fucking paid some bitch to surrogate. This woman, like, I mean.

Speaker 2:
[53:46] Yeah, deal's a deal. I'm with you.

Speaker 3:
[53:48] I'm business rights first.

Speaker 4:
[53:50] But there was something really sad about that. Biologically, that was really sad.

Speaker 3:
[53:55] Can I say, no, here's why it's not sad. Cause the baby wasn't actually asking for mama. Yeah, the baby's making sounds. Sure. The baby's not connecting, I want my mom, right? This is an eight month old baby. They're just making sounds and the people are analyzing it.

Speaker 4:
[54:08] Or maybe we've always been infinite here forever, and we're all connected and he knew his mom was missing.

Speaker 7:
[54:15] No, no moms.

Speaker 3:
[54:17] Only dads.

Speaker 5:
[54:19] Pop, pop.

Speaker 3:
[54:21] You're in a world of cock.

Speaker 5:
[54:23] We're going to go see, get ready for it.

Speaker 4:
[54:25] Pop, pop, nut, nut or whatever. And Tommy McFuckin McFrody.

Speaker 3:
[54:30] What's the other guy's name?

Speaker 5:
[54:32] You're sleeping over at Grandpa Bibby McAnally's house.

Speaker 3:
[54:36] That's fucking wild.

Speaker 2:
[54:37] Shane McAnally.

Speaker 3:
[54:38] Some people are very upset.

Speaker 2:
[54:39] What's the other guy's name?

Speaker 5:
[54:40] Oh, he's a Grammy Award winner.

Speaker 3:
[54:42] Shane McAnally.

Speaker 6:
[54:42] Can we listen to his music?

Speaker 3:
[54:43] Or McAnally.

Speaker 6:
[54:44] Can we hear his music?

Speaker 3:
[54:46] I'm gonna this baby tonight.

Speaker 6:
[54:50] I'm gonna this baby tonight.

Speaker 5:
[54:53] Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch.

Speaker 3:
[54:56] Let's see. I mean, I don't want to get demonetized.

Speaker 6:
[54:59] What?

Speaker 3:
[54:59] YouTube. I guess she could cut it.

Speaker 6:
[55:01] Whoa, wait, he actually does?

Speaker 4:
[55:03] He wrote for Liam Womack?

Speaker 3:
[55:04] No, he's like legit.

Speaker 5:
[55:05] Country music, Thomas Ratt.

Speaker 4:
[55:07] You know, I gotta send my apologies.

Speaker 3:
[55:09] Can I just say this? Look, a rich, a rich gay dude is gonna give this kid a much better life than any of us had.

Speaker 5:
[55:17] Rich gay country writer is like, I might switch for that.

Speaker 4:
[55:20] Actually.

Speaker 3:
[55:23] I'm just not of this sort of thought process that because it's a gay dude, that they can't raise a kid. More power to him. I mean, God, but like being a dad fucking rules, like obviously I think it's-

Speaker 4:
[55:33] He wrote Fade Into You? No, he didn't.

Speaker 5:
[55:35] Crash My Party? That's a big Luke Bryan tune, wow. Have you-

Speaker 4:
[55:40] I'm a McNutt fan, sorry. Call me crazy.

Speaker 3:
[55:44] Kelly Clarkson, Cheryl Crowe. He's a writer. He's not an actual performer. He just writes this stuff.

Speaker 2:
[55:48] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[55:49] That's crazy. He's got a lot of songs.

Speaker 4:
[55:51] He's been going crazy.

Speaker 2:
[55:56] What do you think about the guys that say that there's only one reason gay couples adopt little boys?

Speaker 3:
[56:01] Oh, to fuck them?

Speaker 4:
[56:01] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[56:02] Well, that's a crazy- This is my problem.

Speaker 4:
[56:04] That's a lot.

Speaker 3:
[56:05] I can sit here and go like, yes, it's fucking weird. I do get that, but it's like then people start going like, look at the statistics, bro. The amount of gay guys that are fucking their babies, it's wild. It doesn't happen. It has happened, but it's-

Speaker 2:
[56:17] I would love to know what the number is.

Speaker 4:
[56:19] I think statistically straight white men molest their children more than anyone.

Speaker 3:
[56:23] They do. That's reported because I think straight black men probably do the most molesting out of everybody in the black community. You can just fuck children. Nobody really gives a shit. Uncles are banging their- I'm telling you right now, I'm not saying anything controversial. Oh my god.

Speaker 4:
[56:40] I'm going to have to remove myself now. I've said a lot of horrible things. I mean, I've said disgusting things.

Speaker 2:
[56:47] I think it is a different kind of molestation, though. I think straight dads, when all the black guys aren't even touching, obviously, you're right, that's an open shot case. But I think straight dads, they're maybe like something didn't go their way, they get kind of warped, they end up taking advantage of a child. Gay adoptive dads.

Speaker 3:
[57:07] They get a boner one day, they're like, oh, I gotta get rid of this.

Speaker 2:
[57:09] No, they're like, oh, the outfits that we're gonna buy are gonna be so cute. It's an entire lifetime of being sort of set up to hit the group chat hard for dads.

Speaker 3:
[57:19] Well, it happens, there was that one couple who just had adopted children that they sold to like...

Speaker 4:
[57:25] Yeah, I saw that.

Speaker 3:
[57:26] But these are like outlying stories. This isn't the normal fucking thing that happens. I love to look at the numbers. I looked it up on Grok, and Grok was like, there's no evidence that suggests...

Speaker 2:
[57:36] I don't think I'll ever research this.

Speaker 3:
[57:38] I did. Why Grok research? Does Grok count as research? I feel like Grok counts as research.

Speaker 2:
[57:42] It's probably better than asking any of us.

Speaker 4:
[57:44] I think it's compromised by the I word.

Speaker 2:
[57:47] Ooh.

Speaker 3:
[57:47] The I word?

Speaker 5:
[57:48] Idiot?

Speaker 4:
[57:49] What? Worst.

Speaker 5:
[57:51] I'm telling you, they are raping your children. I'm telling you. They are in their bum, their bum.

Speaker 3:
[58:00] I was raised by a woman who was a fucking psycho and a drug addict and really shouldn't have had children. There's a lot of that too. So it's like, I don't know, like a rich country artist who's got millions of dollars and everything to lose, that baby's probably in a much better situation than I was in.

Speaker 2:
[58:16] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[58:16] 100%.

Speaker 2:
[58:17] Yeah. It's like going with like a hip hop mogul with everything to lose. He's on top of the rap game. He's like, oh, a billionaire. You know what I mean? He's taking you shopping. Yeah. Leave your kid with him.

Speaker 5:
[58:27] It's obviously good.

Speaker 3:
[58:28] Pull up the other story as well. It's about another two gay guys. So now these other two gay guys. All right, Real Ass dudes, let's take a moment and thank Lucy for supporting the show. If you like nicotine, you're going to love Lucy. They make premium nicotine pouches and nicotine gum. And the Lucy Breakers is a pouch with a powerful flavor capsule inside of it. Tastes great, way better than any of these other pouches that you see people using. Great flavors like apple ice, espresso, berry citrus and mango. And it's truly a great choice anytime. If you can't smoke at work or on a flight or in school or whatever it is, Lucy is a great choice. And it's the only pouch that delivers long lasting on-demand flavor. And we're going to give you 20% off today if you guys go to lucy.co. Real. 20% off your first order today when you buy it online at lucy.co. And if you don't want to wait, you can check out the Lucy store locator and find Lucy near you and grab some. And here comes a fine print. Lucy products are only for adults of legal age and every customer is age verified. Warning, this product contains nicotine and nicotine is an addictive chemical. All right, where were we? Let's see. This is actually crazy. Yeah, that's it right there.

Speaker 2:
[59:35] Oh, also look up our three dads on Instagram, the number three.

Speaker 1:
[59:40] That's a couple?

Speaker 7:
[59:41] Yeah, that's awesome, cool.

Speaker 1:
[59:42] So have you ever heard about the statistics coming out that gay men are statistically much more likely to commit child molestation?

Speaker 7:
[59:49] No.

Speaker 1:
[59:50] You've never heard about that before?

Speaker 7:
[59:51] Yeah, no.

Speaker 1:
[59:52] Yeah. Don't you think it's weird that you guys have a child, but neither of you are a woman? No. You don't think that's weird? No. So you had a surrogate? You paid a woman $50,000 to be pregnant? Who are you? And build an emotional connection to a baby? Hey, don't take my mic, dude. I'm actually concerned for your baby's safety. Hey.

Speaker 3:
[60:18] This gay guy beats the shit out of them.

Speaker 7:
[60:21] That's right, you guys are together, you all deserve to be killed.

Speaker 2:
[60:25] Killed by the reals, yeah, killed.

Speaker 7:
[60:27] Boom, boom, boom, boom.

Speaker 5:
[60:30] I want you in my room.

Speaker 3:
[60:37] Boom, boom, boom. You should literally put that out, you should remix that. That's a great reel, dude. That'll go viral.

Speaker 5:
[60:44] I'll rip it.

Speaker 3:
[60:44] Yeah, you should. So, once again, I'm doing a lot of gay defending right now. I'm becoming a woke fucking liberal fucking cucktard. I really am. I just can't, whatever it is, like you can't go up to people and be like, yeah, you're molesting your kid and not expect to get smacked in your fucking mouth.

Speaker 4:
[61:01] Yeah, that's a crazy thing.

Speaker 3:
[61:03] Like, yeah, it's like.

Speaker 4:
[61:04] That's a fuck around and find out situation.

Speaker 3:
[61:06] Yeah, I mean.

Speaker 2:
[61:07] Now, hold on. I want you to hold off on finishing this point until you watch these guys, please.

Speaker 4:
[61:12] Is this them?

Speaker 5:
[61:13] Things are gonna change.

Speaker 2:
[61:14] Let's maybe do daddy quiz.

Speaker 3:
[61:15] Our three dads is crazy. A threeple. These guys.

Speaker 7:
[61:19] Who puts the kids to bed at night?

Speaker 2:
[61:20] Oh, no! Look how much older Daddy Tom is.

Speaker 3:
[61:26] Daddy Tom is paying for everything.

Speaker 5:
[61:29] Daddy Tom has a wildly different physique.

Speaker 2:
[61:32] What do you think about this one?

Speaker 4:
[61:34] This is bad content. This is bad content. This is child molester content. Guys.

Speaker 3:
[61:41] Oh, my God.

Speaker 6:
[61:43] Ew. This is not real.

Speaker 3:
[61:47] Are Daddy Moke Daddy Mark related? They have the same face.

Speaker 6:
[61:51] I'm really scared, guys. I'm really scared.

Speaker 2:
[61:55] We share most of our first names.

Speaker 5:
[61:56] Tim, stop laughing.

Speaker 6:
[61:58] You're the only safe one.

Speaker 2:
[61:59] I've already gone through this. I've already processed this.

Speaker 4:
[62:02] You've met Daddy Moke?

Speaker 2:
[62:03] I don't mind this. I think this is cool and good. You think this is cool?

Speaker 6:
[62:07] He's holding peanut butter in his hand.

Speaker 2:
[62:10] Straight white men are more likely to molest their children than someone like this. So I feel much safer with this kind of thing than even my own household. This is better than my life. I might actually give all of my children to Daddy Moke.

Speaker 4:
[62:28] Oh no, don't send the kids to Moke. Oh my God, these kids are.

Speaker 7:
[62:35] We have a fabulous life together.

Speaker 2:
[62:36] Fabulous life. Look at that house, dude. My life, literally.

Speaker 3:
[62:39] I would let Daddy Tom suck my dick once a month to live in that house. Once a month, I would be Daddy Lewis for the family.

Speaker 5:
[62:49] I think Uncle Tom is getting sucked off, isn't he? He looks like the Money Man.

Speaker 2:
[62:55] I don't know if there's anyone in this house not getting sucked off.

Speaker 3:
[62:59] Oh my God.

Speaker 4:
[63:00] They make him live in the pool house.

Speaker 3:
[63:01] This is a suck factory.

Speaker 4:
[63:04] Wait, go back to the videos where he's doing the hair.

Speaker 2:
[63:08] Wait, are they in a throuple? I wasn't paying attention.

Speaker 1:
[63:10] Hold on.

Speaker 3:
[63:10] Go back to the throuple one. I want to see what the point of that video was.

Speaker 4:
[63:13] They were just explaining.

Speaker 2:
[63:14] Let's go straight through.

Speaker 1:
[63:15] Slightly awkward.

Speaker 7:
[63:19] I'm Daddy Mark. I'm Daddy Mo. I'm Daddy Tom. We have a fabulous life together.

Speaker 1:
[63:23] Hey, come on in. Welcome. Oh my God.

Speaker 4:
[63:25] This is really bad.

Speaker 1:
[63:26] My life.

Speaker 7:
[63:27] The thing is that Mark and I both wanted to do, obviously working out, the shopping, the labels. We love plastic surgery. I don't know about the side effects. I don't know if it can make any expressions. The only time we ever argue is about Zac's husband.

Speaker 2:
[63:40] Whose turn it is to fuck Daddy Tom?

Speaker 7:
[63:44] They keep me in the attic. Tom lives in the pool house.

Speaker 3:
[63:47] The only arguments we ever have is who's allowed to molest the children first.

Speaker 4:
[63:52] I know it's time to go when they pull the fucking string that brings my ladder down from the attic. Those kids, look at that little girl's eyes.

Speaker 2:
[63:59] It's your turn to go wake up Daddy Tom.

Speaker 5:
[64:01] She does have Daddy Mokes eyes though.

Speaker 4:
[64:03] She does have Daddy Mokes eyes.

Speaker 3:
[64:06] Yeah. The things that these kids have seen.

Speaker 4:
[64:09] Tear by Daddy Mokes.

Speaker 2:
[64:10] So Daddy Tom's the ex.

Speaker 3:
[64:12] Oh, Daddy Tom's the ex? Yeah. OK, time out. Wait a bit.

Speaker 4:
[64:15] I'm trying to understand this. Daddy Tom lives in the guest house.

Speaker 3:
[64:19] OK, so these two guys got together. Daddy Tom was one of their exes. But because he was involved in the kid's life, they want to make sure that they fuck the kids up further. They want to really psychologically damage these two children.

Speaker 2:
[64:32] You could get a living nanny just to have a woman's presence around it. Instead, you got a senior citizen queer.

Speaker 4:
[64:39] I want you guys to know that Daddy Moke is also doing his hair and his trick to get him to sit down is peanut butter. This is all really bad content.

Speaker 2:
[64:47] That's what he said. Oh, yeah. Let's see how he applies it.

Speaker 3:
[64:50] My answer is Daddy Moke. My trick is peanut butter. I put it on my balls and I make him lick it.

Speaker 5:
[64:53] I put it on a big dildo while he sucks it off. It's like a dog tour.

Speaker 3:
[64:58] You love peanut butter, don't you, little bitch boy?

Speaker 5:
[65:00] I put it in his Kong dildo.

Speaker 4:
[65:05] Do you see the comment? I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

Speaker 5:
[65:09] Those poor kids.

Speaker 4:
[65:12] That makes him suck peanut butter off a dildo to get them to six a day.

Speaker 3:
[65:20] It's his favorite trait.

Speaker 2:
[65:21] This is his double-ended binky.

Speaker 3:
[65:24] Get him his papa.

Speaker 7:
[65:26] Oh my God.

Speaker 4:
[65:28] Daddy Moke is the scariest thing I've ever seen.

Speaker 3:
[65:31] Here comes the train.

Speaker 5:
[65:33] Oh, they're on cameo. Come on.

Speaker 2:
[65:35] How much?

Speaker 4:
[65:36] Seeing who mocks the family.

Speaker 7:
[65:37] Which dad is ready for their cameo?

Speaker 3:
[65:43] Poor Daddy Tom.

Speaker 5:
[65:45] First of all, a shout out to...

Speaker 3:
[65:47] Daddy Tom's old enough to have AIDS.

Speaker 1:
[65:48] That's crazy.

Speaker 4:
[65:51] Daddy Tom straight up contracted AIDS in New York, Studio 54, 1986.

Speaker 3:
[65:58] Daddy Tom has been around, doggy.

Speaker 5:
[65:59] He's like, I just watch Mark and Moke fuck now.

Speaker 3:
[66:02] That's crazy.

Speaker 4:
[66:02] Mark and Moke.

Speaker 2:
[66:03] I was there for Quaaludes and HIV.

Speaker 3:
[66:06] How did you get... How did you happen upon this?

Speaker 4:
[66:08] Go down, go down, go down, Mark, go down.

Speaker 3:
[66:10] My algorithm is Sabrina Carpenter. Your algorithm is this.

Speaker 2:
[66:13] I think my Dylan might have sent me this.

Speaker 4:
[66:15] Daddy Tom's house tour. I want to see the house.

Speaker 1:
[66:19] Welcome to my house tour.

Speaker 7:
[66:20] Guess what?

Speaker 3:
[66:21] I'm a rule breaker.

Speaker 7:
[66:22] Sir, I'm not allowed to take naps because the couch is decorative. Go napping aloud. These are the kids' snacks which I'm not allowed to eat.

Speaker 2:
[66:31] Listen. So I shove them up my ass.

Speaker 5:
[66:34] Is that what he did? This is how I eat them.

Speaker 4:
[66:38] I'm also not allowed to nap here.

Speaker 6:
[66:40] They're too worried I'm going to get sunburned.

Speaker 2:
[66:41] But I know they're just jealous of the sick suntan I get.

Speaker 4:
[66:43] Now this is another...

Speaker 2:
[66:45] Here's what really pisses them off when I fuck the boy.

Speaker 4:
[66:48] Oh, God.

Speaker 3:
[66:49] Daddy Tom is also the least personable of them. He's obviously paying for everything in this situation.

Speaker 4:
[66:55] He is, and they make him live in the guest house.

Speaker 3:
[66:56] Oh, dude, he's so bad. Daddy Tom stinks. I would say Daddy Tom is my least favorite of the three dads.

Speaker 4:
[67:01] Yeah, Daddy Moke may be my favorite.

Speaker 3:
[67:03] Can we see, let's see who our favorite is.

Speaker 2:
[67:05] Sorry, Daddy Tom is security.

Speaker 4:
[67:06] Let's do Daddy Mark's rules. That'll get us to know.

Speaker 3:
[67:08] Daddy Mark's rules. I want to see who these people are, because we have to pick a favorite before we get out of here.

Speaker 2:
[67:13] Oh, Jesus Christ.

Speaker 3:
[67:14] It's like you have a penis and piss on the wall.

Speaker 5:
[67:17] Put him back in the Blair Witch Project pose.

Speaker 2:
[67:20] Put your penis back in the sory hole. That's what you get for fibbing.

Speaker 3:
[67:28] Go stand above Daddy Moke while he sleeps. Freak him the fuck out, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[67:35] I heard that.

Speaker 6:
[67:38] Hey, what are you guys doing? County bricks?

Speaker 3:
[67:42] Good joke, Daddy Tom. You fucking loser. Your fucking joke stinks. County bricks is good.

Speaker 1:
[67:53] Hey, what are you guys doing?

Speaker 5:
[67:57] Waiting to get in the ass.

Speaker 3:
[68:01] Well, the other side of it is like, take the three dads out of it. Just take the three dads out of it. Gladly. It's also like just stop like putting your kids on like, stop making content out of your kids.

Speaker 2:
[68:14] It's crazy. They're not really doing anything real with them. It's all just like stage content.

Speaker 3:
[68:18] I know what a stage content, but still at the same time, it's like, I don't know, give these kids like, like I post some shit about my son and my stories.

Speaker 2:
[68:23] Like, but I'm telling you, I want more visibility on these children.

Speaker 3:
[68:27] Never stop recording. You're a proud dad. You're a proud dad.

Speaker 2:
[68:31] Yes.

Speaker 3:
[68:32] You'll post some stuff with your kids here and there, but it's like, you know, we also understand the world that we fucking live in. You're not pushing your kids into becoming content creators, which is what this is.

Speaker 2:
[68:41] Right. Yeah. They're literally grooming them.

Speaker 3:
[68:44] Let's see the quiz.

Speaker 4:
[68:45] Prepping for baby three.

Speaker 3:
[68:46] I know.

Speaker 5:
[68:47] This is just the next season.

Speaker 3:
[68:48] It's just him taking prep. Yeah. Got to take some prep. Let's see.

Speaker 7:
[68:55] Who makes the twins breakfast in the morning?

Speaker 3:
[68:57] Oh, that's the one.

Speaker 4:
[69:00] Daddy Tom has tits on in that video, too.

Speaker 5:
[69:04] He gives the kids diarrhea. He knowingly gives his kids diarrhea.

Speaker 3:
[69:09] And it makes their assholes all gross. We don't want that. Nobody wants a sticky asshole.

Speaker 5:
[69:14] It's not like it gets all lubed up.

Speaker 7:
[69:16] You know what I mean?

Speaker 3:
[69:17] Ew.

Speaker 2:
[69:19] Honey, where do we put the children's poppers?

Speaker 3:
[69:23] That's a hole for love.

Speaker 2:
[69:24] Next to the liquid Tylenol.

Speaker 5:
[69:27] You guys are known for that. Is that a mom? If anybody's gonna judge this routine, it's going to be me.

Speaker 3:
[69:36] Oh, I hate this bitch too, by the way. I hate this bitch. I saw mom.

Speaker 7:
[69:41] I didn't know.

Speaker 3:
[69:42] Abby, yeah, she's from Dance Moms. You know Wheelchair? And that show's fucked up in itself, dude. Like literally, like that show, it's like fat moms watch it and pedophiles.

Speaker 5:
[69:50] If that's who you're associating with.

Speaker 3:
[69:52] The only people that watch this show, I only know about it because I'm a pedo. My sister watches it. She's a fat mom. I think my fat mom's sister watches it. Like all the time it's on my house and I'm watching it. I'm like, this is like so weird. You have these girls dancing around in little fucking tight bikinis for a...

Speaker 4:
[70:08] Actually, I watched it. I thought it was really good.

Speaker 2:
[70:11] Fat moms in like the denim capris that are like squeezing their calves love little kids dancing.

Speaker 3:
[70:16] They love little kids dancing.

Speaker 2:
[70:18] I think they all used to.

Speaker 3:
[70:19] Well, they wanted to dance, but they weren't.

Speaker 2:
[70:20] Why do the ex-dancers all get so fucking fat?

Speaker 3:
[70:22] But I don't think they're ex-dancers. I think it was like they were little girls who saw other pretty little girls doing fun things like being ballerinas and cheerleaders, and they never did it. And then they were like, well, now it's my opportunity to make a little fucking...

Speaker 4:
[70:33] No, I didn't.

Speaker 2:
[70:35] Yeah, it doesn't say like Austin are athletic sons.

Speaker 3:
[70:38] Yeah, dude, exactly.

Speaker 2:
[70:39] Two fat pussies.

Speaker 3:
[70:43] fat loser with mommy issues. James, Jiu-Jitsu. Go choke that guy out. Um, yeah. I mean, look, back to the video with the guy hitting the guy, it's like...

Speaker 2:
[70:57] I don't even remember what happened.

Speaker 3:
[70:59] If you go up to people who start talking shit, right?

Speaker 2:
[71:02] Yes.

Speaker 3:
[71:03] You should expect to get hit. Now, I'm not saying that's right, right? Somebody in the comments on Twitter, because I'm ranting on Twitter, I was on a flight, and he was like, yeah, dude, so you're one of these people who think if a white guy says Yen word, he deserves to get hit. And I was like, that's not what I said at all. But if you go to a black guy and call him the N word, he's going to fuck you up. Yeah. Expect it. I'm not saying that he should. I'm not saying you should go fight.

Speaker 2:
[71:23] We're simply observing cause and effect.

Speaker 3:
[71:25] That is just the world we fucking live in. If you go and start popping shit to some people. What's going on? Oh, hi, big. You want to hang over? We're about to wrap up anyway. Caroline, CJ. Hi.

Speaker 2:
[71:39] Good to see you again.

Speaker 3:
[71:42] This is my opponent at Skankfest. Hello. You see how right or die she was?

Speaker 5:
[71:47] She was like, she was dead.

Speaker 4:
[71:48] Dude, she threw her fist up at him.

Speaker 5:
[71:50] Oh yeah, she threw up a black power symbol very quickly.

Speaker 4:
[71:53] She said the N-word.

Speaker 5:
[71:57] Sorry.

Speaker 3:
[71:58] I mean, dude, I would do a reaction podcast with you. I'll start at the Three Dads. Like we can just do the Three Dads show the same way they have. We'll have to play tomorrow. Doggie, I really will. I'm telling you right now, I'll never get over that. That's crazy. They are so entertaining. I want to just watch them live their lives.

Speaker 2:
[72:16] I forget what our verdict was. We covered it on TVS, but I'd be happy to deep dive with you, man.

Speaker 3:
[72:25] That's a wild one.

Speaker 2:
[72:25] Put us in a terrible mood for the whole week.

Speaker 3:
[72:27] All right, we're gonna wrap this one.

Speaker 2:
[72:29] This is fun.

Speaker 3:
[72:30] You guys are the shit. Love you guys. Thank you guys for being here. We're gonna be throwing Fist of Cuffs at Skankfest. Skankfest is due to go on sale Monday, 420, 2 p.m. Eastern. Get your tickets to see myself versus CJ Bishop on the Friday. It's gonna be the first day of the festival, Friday afternoon.

Speaker 5:
[72:46] Right after Skank Walk, right?

Speaker 3:
[72:48] Probably two, three, something like that.

Speaker 5:
[72:50] Cool.

Speaker 3:
[72:51] Get yourself ready, buddy.

Speaker 5:
[72:52] I'm really excited. And again, thank you for the opportunity. I think it's gonna be a great battle, dude.

Speaker 3:
[72:56] I'm gonna give it everything I got. Are you feeling good about it? Are you feeling good about your skills?

Speaker 5:
[72:59] I feel very good about it. I'm not gonna say that I'm gonna fuck you up or anything like that, because that would be crazy.

Speaker 2:
[73:03] No, tell him you're gonna him up, actually.

Speaker 5:
[73:04] But I'm gonna fuck you harder than Daddy Moke fucks those kids.

Speaker 4:
[73:09] Daddy Moke.

Speaker 5:
[73:10] You're gonna be standing facing away from the ring until I tell you to turn around.

Speaker 3:
[73:14] I'm gonna wake up, there's gonna be a peanut butter dildo in my mouth.

Speaker 4:
[73:17] You're gonna be walking like Daddy Tom.

Speaker 5:
[73:20] We're gonna go from Daddy Mark to Daddy Tom.

Speaker 3:
[73:22] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[73:23] Yeah, I'm stoked, man.

Speaker 3:
[73:25] I'm stoked, too. It's fine. And here's the other thing I'll tell you, and Tim will tell you this as well. We'll fight and it'll be really fun and it'll be a cool experience. And you get closer with somebody once you fight them in a weird way. It's a way, cause I remember you saying something like that. You were like, you were like, you said it on some podcasts. You were like, you're like, I'm closer with Luis now that we're like doing this than I was before.

Speaker 2:
[73:45] Yeah. Well, I also have to say this, dude. I put a lot into training. I was in the best shape of my entire life. I was obviously like two years behind Luis, like learning how to just box. And at the same time, Luis had like really helped me in my comedy career so much that I was now juggling like training enough for a real fight and also like all these opportunities that started coming to my way around the same time.

Speaker 3:
[74:11] Yeah, of course.

Speaker 2:
[74:12] And so I sort of resented the training. I hated it. It made me so sick how much time it took. And I was so happy when it was over, but we just worked together so much throughout the whole thing. And I don't know, I feel like the blessings just really took off around the time. And I hated that too.

Speaker 3:
[74:28] If you fight, you would train in martial arts for a long time.

Speaker 2:
[74:31] I'm actually indebted to Luis forever.

Speaker 3:
[74:35] But when you train martial arts and I mean, I box, I spar, I mean, four or five days a week. Like, that's for the most part what I do. I warm up on a heavy bag and some pad work and some jump rope, but I just fight. Like, that's really what I do. And there's no animosity like when I'm doing this. Like, even if like somebody catches me with a good one, I want to fucking get them back. It's more like a competitive, like, you know, if somebody fucking like hits a basket in basketball, you're like, oh, now I got to get that point back.

Speaker 5:
[75:03] Someone tells a fucking great joke before you go on. You're like, OK, let's kick it up a notch.

Speaker 3:
[75:07] No, I just ride the wave. Devin Poston opened up the Shane Show at the. He's the perfect, perfect fucking guy to open that show because he's so likable and so funny. Great energy, really funny. A great fucking bit. I don't want to ruin the bit. He just talks about fucking somebody wrote love on his girlfriend's car in high school. You heard this. Have you heard this bit? No, I don't want to ruin the bit, but it's a really funny. He was dating a white girl in high school. And then somebody wrote whatever on her car.

Speaker 4:
[75:41] How many times? Too many times.

Speaker 2:
[75:44] Sorry. I almost didn't even register he was saying. I thought you were judging the guy that wrote it on the car.

Speaker 3:
[75:51] Well, I'm telling you, sir, that's what it said.

Speaker 5:
[75:53] He's quoting.

Speaker 4:
[75:54] Yeah, but you already said it once. We know. You just wanted to say it twice.

Speaker 5:
[75:57] Wait, what did the car say?

Speaker 4:
[75:58] It's like a kid that you let cuss once.

Speaker 3:
[76:00] It didn't say, you like her.

Speaker 4:
[76:01] No.

Speaker 3:
[76:02] It didn't. I said it didn't.

Speaker 4:
[76:04] Stop.

Speaker 3:
[76:05] That would have been better. It would have been. He did this, dude, he did this bit. And it's like Shane Gillis' fans are all 18 to 26 year old white kids and they just love the N word. They were so happy. They were so happy. He got off on such a big pop and I just fucking rode that wave. It was great. So shout out to Shane Gillis and his continued success. We're wrapping it up. You guys are the shit. Support Tim Butterly. Support CJ Bishop. Support Kim Congdon and everything that they do. And thank you guys for being here for your favorite podcast, the Real Ass Podcast. We'll be back next Monday right here on GaS Digital. Until then, good night.