transcript

Speaker 1:
[00:15] I don't even love this s***, but I ain't eating no damn tuna fish or bread.

Speaker 2:
[00:19] Riley's trying to compose himself anyways. Welcome back from Bloodline Banter. I'm Landon.

Speaker 1:
[00:23] And I'm Riley.

Speaker 3:
[00:24] And here we are. How are you feeling this morning?

Speaker 1:
[00:26] I'm feeling great.

Speaker 4:
[00:27] How are you feeling?

Speaker 3:
[00:28] I feel wonderful.

Speaker 4:
[00:30] I bet you do.

Speaker 2:
[00:30] Well, you had a time last night. I'll just go ahead and tell everybody. We went out with our friends. Riley and I decided to...

Speaker 1:
[00:36] We ended up on Broadway again.

Speaker 4:
[00:38] And I feel like every single time we record, the very first thing is we say, last night we were on Broadway and this happened. But we've had so many friends visiting, it's just like we have to give them the full Nashville experience.

Speaker 2:
[00:50] And there's nothing better than Riley and I, a little tipsy on Broadway.

Speaker 4:
[00:53] Little.

Speaker 3:
[00:56] This is Riley, last night trying to talk to Landon. Shut up. You had one eye closed.

Speaker 4:
[01:00] Anyways. I actually like, could drink the Tennessee River, like the water in the Tennessee River right now.

Speaker 1:
[01:08] I'm so parched.

Speaker 3:
[01:09] Well, do you have a water?

Speaker 1:
[01:10] Landon, this water is in a box. My credit score is going to go up 30 points when I drink this water out of a box. I can feel my socioeconomic status rising right now.

Speaker 2:
[01:22] I have no idea what we're talking about today. We've not planned out this episode.

Speaker 1:
[01:26] Let me just tell you this. Last night, we did see a lot of crazy shit on Broadway. I seen a woman leaving a Christian revival, smoking a cigarette, as long as this pointer finger, like this, hands shaking. She hadn't had one in about two and a half hours and she was feening for one.

Speaker 3:
[01:44] She just let the Christian revival.

Speaker 1:
[01:45] And you know what? She was smoking Virginia and Slim. Alright, Virginia Slim menthol 100s. She was throwing it down last night.

Speaker 2:
[01:56] And all the rest of them were on Broadway.

Speaker 1:
[01:58] Then I seen two people making love to Country Roads Take Me Out. I took a video. They are literally, according to them, there was nobody around them as they were bumping and grinding to John Denver. Country Roads Take Me Home.

Speaker 3:
[02:19] And it was a time.

Speaker 1:
[02:20] If you can get down to Country Roads Take Me Home, I think you can get down to anything, the ABCs.

Speaker 2:
[02:25] Well, let's talk about my morning. I get in the car. We woke up this morning. I woke up at 9.30, and I was feeling fine. Everybody was hungry as hell, so we went to Chick-fil-A. I've never been to Chick-fil-A where they messed up my order. And Chick-fil-A left out my chicken biscuit this morning. And I turned around in the middle of a two-five-five-way intersection. And just, vwoop.

Speaker 1:
[02:49] Yeah, Landon also took the wrong turn on the way to the city this morning.

Speaker 4:
[02:53] Like, we haven't been here 150 times.

Speaker 1:
[02:55] And then he proceeded to do a five-point turn in the middle of the intersection, middle of the road, with cars lined up on both sides of the road.

Speaker 2:
[03:02] I honked at least at 7,000 people this morning because dumb bitches don't know how to drive.

Speaker 1:
[03:07] Yeah, and I drove, let me just tell you what I did yesterday. Riley drove back to Nashville yesterday because I was back home in Georgia. When I tell you that Fast & Furious would have casted me last night, I ain't kidding.

Speaker 2:
[03:21] You were going 93.

Speaker 1:
[03:22] Vin Diesel has never driven as fast as I drove last night. I'm not committing to any crimes, but I'm just going to tell you I was breaking the law.

Speaker 4:
[03:31] Okay.

Speaker 1:
[03:32] I cannot take you seriously drinking out of a boxed water.

Speaker 3:
[03:35] Why?

Speaker 4:
[03:36] Cheese that's come in boxes, Landon, not water.

Speaker 3:
[03:38] That's all they have over at the well.

Speaker 4:
[03:42] We're going to do our dash here in a minute. Okay. I'm drinking half of it.

Speaker 2:
[03:48] Okay. I just lost all my train of thought.

Speaker 3:
[03:54] This is not a good day.

Speaker 1:
[03:58] My brain is how you feel right now.

Speaker 2:
[04:01] My brain.

Speaker 1:
[04:01] Yeah, my brain feels like it's like scrambled eggs.

Speaker 2:
[04:04] You know what I was thinking of last night at two o'clock in the morning because I couldn't go to bed? I was thinking that Artemis 2 went to the moon and somehow them bitches can do an interview from here to space and I can't even get my damn Xfinity Wi-Fi.

Speaker 5:
[04:16] Oh my gosh.

Speaker 1:
[04:18] The past week, I keep getting, I just spit everywhere. The past week, I keep getting notifications saying, try using without Wi-Fi. And then I got a notification this morning saying, please hold.

Speaker 2:
[04:30] Holding. Damn, hurry.

Speaker 1:
[04:34] I got a notification this morning saying, thank you for your payment, 5146. Xfinity, whoever owns Xfinity, I'm going to need you, my Venmo is, I'm going to put it in my Instagram bio like one of them maters, because I expect a full payment in the morning of a refund, because I don't pay 5146 to not even be able to watch damn Facebook Reels.

Speaker 2:
[04:59] Facebook Reels?

Speaker 1:
[05:00] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[05:01] Oh, that's like an old soul.

Speaker 4:
[05:03] I love watching Facebook Reels.

Speaker 2:
[05:04] Facebook Reels is like TikTok videos about three weeks later.

Speaker 4:
[05:09] No, literally.

Speaker 2:
[05:09] Anyways, I just find it hard to believe that they interviewed-

Speaker 4:
[05:14] Is it Artemis or Armitus?

Speaker 2:
[05:16] Artemis. Artemis.

Speaker 1:
[05:19] I don't know why the hell they went with them. I know Apollo 11 or Apollo 11.

Speaker 2:
[05:22] Do you think they actually went?

Speaker 1:
[05:24] I don't know.

Speaker 2:
[05:27] All I know is if you can stop through the damn space, my wife can work.

Speaker 4:
[05:33] The only toilet on board was malfunctioning.

Speaker 2:
[05:35] Yeah, and the woman had to fix it.

Speaker 4:
[05:37] Not to mention, where does it go?

Speaker 2:
[05:39] It recycles, so they have something to drink.

Speaker 1:
[05:42] You're fucking lying.

Speaker 2:
[05:43] He's lying.

Speaker 1:
[05:44] I'm serious. You're lying.

Speaker 2:
[05:46] On the space station, that's what happens.

Speaker 1:
[05:47] That's not true.

Speaker 2:
[05:48] I am not lying.

Speaker 1:
[05:50] If they recycle shit water, then we should just leave them in space.

Speaker 2:
[05:55] I'm sorry. Do they recycle shit water in space to get water? I'm telling you, they do.

Speaker 1:
[06:04] You're lying.

Speaker 2:
[06:05] One bitch was eating shrimp cocktail.

Speaker 6:
[06:07] You're right, Landon, you're right.

Speaker 1:
[06:08] Oh, there's no damn way.

Speaker 6:
[06:12] It says, urine is collected via funnel and recycled into drinking water while fecal matter is pulled into sealed bags for storage and disposal, often incinerated upon reentry.

Speaker 1:
[06:21] Sealed bags?

Speaker 2:
[06:22] So they vacuum-fill the ship.

Speaker 1:
[06:24] There's no gravity in space. What if it went over into the pantry and you thought it was something else?

Speaker 2:
[06:29] Well, how does it stay in the toilet? How does it stay? They don't. They eat the stuff, the powdered stuff. No, it's like the freeze-dried stuff. Yeah, it's powdered. No, not an MRE. Well, kind of. More or less. Well, I'm just curious. This is so disgusting, but how do they shit in a toilet and it not float back up?

Speaker 5:
[06:48] How do they pee?

Speaker 6:
[06:49] It's a vacuum toilet, so it sucks it. Like an airplane.

Speaker 3:
[06:53] It's like a cruise ship toilet.

Speaker 5:
[06:54] It's sucking it too.

Speaker 6:
[06:55] You know when you're on the airplane and you go...

Speaker 2:
[06:57] Yeah, but it don't do that.

Speaker 1:
[07:01] I bet you money that they shit and just open the door and let it go out tomorrow.

Speaker 3:
[07:04] They can't open the door in a spaceship.

Speaker 5:
[07:07] How do you think they walked on the moon?

Speaker 3:
[07:10] They didn't.

Speaker 1:
[07:11] I know they didn't, but there's a footprint on there.

Speaker 5:
[07:13] They faked it real good.

Speaker 2:
[07:16] Anyways, that just blows my mind. You know what else blows my mind? The Strait of Hormuz can't even open, and we've got moon money?

Speaker 1:
[07:26] No, no, I don't give a fuck about the Strait of Hormuz. That's on the other side of the country, the world.

Speaker 5:
[07:34] I'm still pissed that I ain't got Wi-Fi.

Speaker 1:
[07:37] I'm so serious.

Speaker 5:
[07:39] I pay $51.46 a month, and there's bitches walking on the moon. And they're already saying we're going back next year.

Speaker 2:
[07:47] We are. They're going to walk on the moon next year.

Speaker 5:
[07:50] We can't even pay off.

Speaker 2:
[07:51] They've got to do it for real this time, because they didn't do it last time.

Speaker 1:
[07:54] Bitch, they're going to find a desert in the middle of New Mexico, and cut out all the lights, and wait until it gets real dark, and then jump. We ain't never been to the damn moon. Helen Keller knows we've never been to the moon.

Speaker 3:
[08:12] Oh shit.

Speaker 2:
[08:13] Would you ever go to the space?

Speaker 5:
[08:16] Hell no! Does it look like I would go to space? I ain't shitting in that vacuum-filled toilet.

Speaker 1:
[08:22] And I damn sure ain't drinking my piss.

Speaker 2:
[08:26] I wouldn't either. You couldn't pay me a million dollars.

Speaker 5:
[08:27] There's no way that's healthy.

Speaker 4:
[08:31] What if they have like a medical emergency up there?

Speaker 2:
[08:34] I hope one of them's a paramedic.

Speaker 4:
[08:37] What good is that going to do?

Speaker 1:
[08:38] You're in damn space.

Speaker 2:
[08:39] I do want to float. I want to go to like Earth's outer atmosphere, just right where there's no gravity.

Speaker 1:
[08:45] Landon, go to Pigeon Forge and take a ride at the second lot and you can do the skydiving indoor.

Speaker 3:
[08:49] I did do that.

Speaker 4:
[08:51] That's as close to floating you're going to get.

Speaker 2:
[08:53] I would go and then just come right back. But I would only go with Elon.

Speaker 1:
[08:58] I'm not going to Kmart with Elon. You can. As much taxes as he pays, there's no way he's actually paying that shit.

Speaker 4:
[09:07] They're going to send him to prison one day.

Speaker 1:
[09:09] What? Don't say that's allegedly for educational purposes only.

Speaker 2:
[09:16] Yeah, so you would never go to space.

Speaker 5:
[09:18] But do you really? Only.

Speaker 2:
[09:20] I'm telling you, only to just float.

Speaker 4:
[09:22] You don't even like leaving your apartment and you want to go to space? I only have to fight like hell to get you to go to lunch. And you want to go float?

Speaker 2:
[09:33] Would you not actually like to do that? You want me to tell you a funny story? I used to go to the Space Museum in Huntsville, Alabama. On field trips and I thought in like fifth grade that we were going to get to that Space Museum and they were going to have some kind of contraption where they took the gravity out of the like room and I was going to get to float.

Speaker 1:
[09:49] Listen, I wonder why didn't they send Katy Perry on Armitice? She went to space, remember, whenever they took their three-minute-way ride to the stratosphere?

Speaker 2:
[09:56] No, that bitch had a photo op in a spaceship at the Huntsville Spaceship Museum and went her ass right back to Los Angeles and now she's dating the damn Prime Minister of Canada.

Speaker 1:
[10:05] The former Prime Minister of Canada, hell. She's Canadian Royalty. She probably is going to be on Maple Syrup Bottle in the next five years. It ain't easy being wheezy.

Speaker 2:
[10:22] She had Orlando Bloom, Manji.

Speaker 3:
[10:25] Katy Perry had Orlando Bloom.

Speaker 2:
[10:27] I just got a message. You know that feeling when a song comes on and you just feel it like you want a honky and you want a tonky?

Speaker 1:
[10:33] Yeah. It hits different when you're in a field with thousands of people who feel the exact same way.

Speaker 2:
[10:37] That's exactly what Rock The Country is. And it's coming to Belleville, Texas, May 1st and 2nd, 2026 at the Austin County Fairgrounds.

Speaker 1:
[10:43] This is the kind of lineup that you screenshot and send in your group chat. Jason Aldean, Ella Langley, Kid Rock, Brantley Gilbert, Aaron Lewis and the Statelineers, Diamond Rio, Shannon Doa, Chase Matthew and more.

Speaker 2:
[10:54] Artists who've been the soundtrack to people's best nights, worst heartbreaks and everything in between.

Speaker 1:
[10:58] It just hits different in the middle of a cornfield. And let me tell you something, I am an Ella fella.

Speaker 2:
[11:02] And Jason Aldean ain't never done me dirty.

Speaker 1:
[11:05] There's a new Raze Rowdy stage daily throwback happy hour. DJ sets two full days of the kind of weekend that you actually want to remember.

Speaker 2:
[11:12] And we're gonna be there. And we really want y'all to be there with us, not just watching from your phone, but actually there in person.

Speaker 1:
[11:18] Go grab your tickets at rockthecountry.com, come to Belleville and make it a story worth telling.

Speaker 2:
[11:22] Anyways, pack your crap and get in the car boys.

Speaker 1:
[11:24] And girls, we'll see you in Texas.

Speaker 2:
[11:28] Hi, it's AT&T. As our customer, you may be eligible for our best deals on the latest smartphones. The new upgrade are at a new line today.

Speaker 4:
[11:35] Yeah, they want you at a new line when they can't even give you service on the fucking one you've got.

Speaker 2:
[11:39] Amen.

Speaker 4:
[11:40] I was in Target the other day, and you know how the salesmen stand out there and try, hey, how are you? Try to make small talk and try to get...

Speaker 2:
[11:46] Target? Yeah. I've never seen that. I've only seen that at a Chevy dealership. Target don't have salesmen standing outside. Those are homeless people trying to sell a damn newspaper.

Speaker 5:
[11:57] I beg your finest pardon.

Speaker 1:
[11:59] Yes, the hell they do. In the back at the electronics, he worked for AT&T.

Speaker 2:
[12:03] I thought you were out front.

Speaker 1:
[12:04] No, in the back for AT&T.

Speaker 5:
[12:07] And he said...

Speaker 2:
[12:08] Target has an AT&T?

Speaker 1:
[12:10] Landon, just let me finish my damn story. No, he's standing beside the iPhones wanting you to switch to Geico to save 15% or more on car insurance.

Speaker 5:
[12:20] He said...

Speaker 2:
[12:21] Hey, I have Geico.

Speaker 1:
[12:22] Oh my gosh.

Speaker 2:
[12:23] Listen, they did save me 15% or more on car insurance. They saved me about 30%. Well, tell the sponsor of the podcast.

Speaker 1:
[12:29] I have Progressive Flow.

Speaker 2:
[12:30] Oh, I'm sorry, Geico, but I have you, and you saved me 30% or more on car insurance.

Speaker 1:
[12:35] As I was saying before, I was disrespectfully interrupted three times or more.

Speaker 5:
[12:40] He was like, hey, do you have AT&T?

Speaker 1:
[12:43] I was like, yeah, I have AT&T, unfortunately, and you do not want my opinion. He was like, okay, sir, have a good day. I was like, mm-hmm. Me too.

Speaker 2:
[12:51] Is that all you had to say?

Speaker 1:
[12:52] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[12:53] Oh, I thought it was going to be a lot more juicy than that.

Speaker 1:
[12:56] No, you think that.

Speaker 2:
[12:57] I will say this about Target. They have younger people working in the back in the electronic department. They actually know what a phone is. Unlike Walmart, you'll go to the damn technology department and you've got 77-year-old papa that just needs a fucking part-time job because he can't afford groceries.

Speaker 4:
[13:12] The guy that works here.

Speaker 2:
[13:12] Which is sad because we've got no money.

Speaker 4:
[13:17] It's not funny.

Speaker 2:
[13:21] We can't help our elderly. Anyways.

Speaker 4:
[13:24] Priorities.

Speaker 1:
[13:25] And then, not to mention taxes are due in a couple of days. That's a whole other range.

Speaker 2:
[13:29] I filed an extension and I thought by filing an extension, you got an extension to pay and that's not accurate. You have to pay them bitches on the 15th. Let's talk about that.

Speaker 1:
[13:39] Mr. President, the IRS is close to constructing a nuclear weapon and they also say you were a bitch. I'm gonna need you to act accordingly.

Speaker 4:
[13:47] Is it bad that I think he would bomb him for calling him a bitch before he bombed him for having a nuclear weapon?

Speaker 1:
[13:52] Because he's a puss sometimes, if I'm being completely honest. He'd be getting his feelings hurt a lot.

Speaker 2:
[13:58] Well, let's just talk about politics for like two seconds. Kristi Nolum's husband.

Speaker 1:
[14:04] Landon, this water smells so bad.

Speaker 5:
[14:06] Like, I think this is moon water.

Speaker 2:
[14:12] Kristi Nolum's husband has decided that he has taken notes from Caitlyn Jenner.

Speaker 1:
[14:18] And Caitlyn Jenner looks way better doing it than he does.

Speaker 5:
[14:21] I'm gonna tell you.

Speaker 1:
[14:23] Because he uses plastic tits and straps them on like a Kevlar vest.

Speaker 3:
[14:30] And our friend Brett Cooper calls him Big Boobie Brian.

Speaker 2:
[14:39] Oh, okay, we can't talk about that, can we?

Speaker 1:
[14:41] I don't care what we talk about today, to be completely honest.

Speaker 2:
[14:44] Your face is red.

Speaker 4:
[14:46] My blood pressure's probably pretty high.

Speaker 2:
[14:48] Hey, what was your sleep score last night?

Speaker 1:
[14:50] 70, I think.

Speaker 3:
[14:51] Damn, that's good. To have drinking more trout than somebody in the Tennessee River, or whatever the fuck you said earlier.

Speaker 2:
[14:59] Anyways, mine was 64, fair. It was fair. But you remember, my sleep score didn't used to get above 60. I don't sleep, I literally just lay there. Rim sleep or deep sleep has never touched my body ever, I don't think. Last night it did. You were laying there like you were in a casket. Yeah, I sleep with no pillow.

Speaker 1:
[15:17] Landon sleeps with no pillow, flat on his back. Yeah, might as well go ahead and put a toe tag on him.

Speaker 2:
[15:29] What was we doing?

Speaker 4:
[15:31] I don't know, but I know one thing.

Speaker 1:
[15:32] I need an industrial-sized box fan right here.

Speaker 2:
[15:35] You're hot?

Speaker 4:
[15:36] Yes, Landon.

Speaker 2:
[15:38] Hey, did you see my video that went viral about jury duty?

Speaker 4:
[15:42] No.

Speaker 2:
[15:43] Put me on jury duty, bitch.

Speaker 5:
[15:46] Everybody always bitches about it.

Speaker 2:
[15:47] I know, but I'm nosy as hell and I want to go in there. I want to go sit on the jury.

Speaker 1:
[15:51] But I will say this, if you're in jury duty for a big case, you're locked away from the world for two weeks or however long the jury trial is.

Speaker 2:
[15:58] Lock me away. If I get to jur a murder trial, sign me up.

Speaker 1:
[16:02] Don't sign me up. I got anxiety.

Speaker 2:
[16:04] You wouldn't want to do that.

Speaker 1:
[16:05] No.

Speaker 2:
[16:07] And like I said in my video, I'm not striking shit from the record. I'm not disregarding any remarks.

Speaker 1:
[16:12] Yeah, how does that even work? The judge is like, strike that from the record. Hell no, I'm not striking it from my memory.

Speaker 2:
[16:18] Yeah, I would like to go to jury duty.

Speaker 1:
[16:20] Really?

Speaker 2:
[16:21] I would treat it like a TV show. The minute a lawyer said objection, I'd go, oh, you hear that?

Speaker 1:
[16:27] On what grounds? Hearsay! Sustained.

Speaker 3:
[16:30] A deliberation room would hate to see me coming, bitch. I would have a fucking wall with those yarn pieces pointed down sort of evidence.

Speaker 1:
[16:36] Do you think in the deliberation room, they have like a little table set up with snacks for the jury people?

Speaker 2:
[16:43] Yeah, would you do it then? Maybe.

Speaker 1:
[16:48] Like Cheez-Its and like Biscoff cookies and like box water.

Speaker 2:
[16:52] Yes. Box water.

Speaker 1:
[16:55] Honestly, I would rather have like Aquafina.

Speaker 2:
[16:59] Anyways, what are we at, Toby?

Speaker 5:
[17:03] About 15 minutes.

Speaker 2:
[17:06] There's no way. I've been talking for an hour.

Speaker 1:
[17:10] We got to do this again in a minute, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[17:12] It's going to be easier when Skyler's on here. I have been talking for a damn hour, and our producer guy just told us.

Speaker 1:
[17:18] Producer guy? He has a name.

Speaker 2:
[17:22] Well, I forgot it for like 272 minutes. I just said it. We've only been recording for 15 minutes.

Speaker 1:
[17:28] I will say this.

Speaker 4:
[17:30] Let's talk about my papa and Aussie.

Speaker 1:
[17:33] I came home yesterday like I said.

Speaker 3:
[17:35] I don't know about my papa.

Speaker 1:
[17:40] Because they usually cut that out, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[17:42] We're not cutting it out. We're leaving everything in today.

Speaker 4:
[17:45] Not everything.

Speaker 1:
[17:45] I'm watching it to make sure I didn't say anything inappropriate.

Speaker 4:
[17:50] Hell, you done got me.

Speaker 2:
[17:52] You're talking about poppy. Poppy.

Speaker 1:
[17:54] Oh, sorry. I went home. I just got home yesterday and whenever I am back home, my grandparents watch my dog for me. My grandpa calls. I have a miniature Australian Shepherd. He's like my best friend. His name is Aussie. My grandpa calls him everything but Aussie. He'll be taking him out and he'll be like, come on Roscoe, come on Fido. I was like.

Speaker 3:
[18:21] What did he call him the other day? Trooper Cooper or something?

Speaker 1:
[18:24] Yeah, he's like, come on. No, he says Roscoe all the time. Come on Roscoe. I'm like Poppy.

Speaker 2:
[18:30] I think that's just old people with names. We used to have a horse and his name was DeSoto. DeSoto.

Speaker 3:
[18:35] DeSoto.

Speaker 2:
[18:35] And my poppy used to say, come on DeSoto.

Speaker 1:
[18:39] Whenever we go through and order coffee, what does your papa call it?

Speaker 3:
[18:43] The Caramel Shar-Pei. Have you seen those trends where people go to like the Starbucks and they're like, get their parents.

Speaker 5:
[18:53] Order a Fupa Chalupa.

Speaker 3:
[18:56] I want to do it so bad.

Speaker 2:
[18:57] They'll send their parents to the Taco Bell and they'll be like, I want one Fupa Chalupa. And they video it and you know, it's in the older people don't have any idea what they're talking about. And well, there's a trend right now going around. People are sending their parents and like their grandparents to Starbucks and ask them to add two back shots to their drink. And they'll do it.

Speaker 3:
[19:17] They're like, can I get two back shots with that?

Speaker 1:
[19:19] Our grandkids and stuff are never going to be able to play jokes on like jokes like that on us because like we grew up like I will not have grandkids.

Speaker 4:
[19:29] Are you even going to have kids? Are you even going to get married?

Speaker 2:
[19:31] I might adopt a little orphan child or something. That's in serious need.

Speaker 1:
[19:42] What were you about to say?

Speaker 3:
[19:43] You are acting so weird.

Speaker 1:
[19:45] Landon, I'm tired. I didn't even, REM sleep isn't even in my vocabulary today.

Speaker 5:
[19:57] I knew that's what you meant.

Speaker 3:
[20:00] I was the Jonah Hill meme.

Speaker 4:
[20:02] Oh, okay.

Speaker 3:
[20:04] How would that work?

Speaker 5:
[20:05] Are we still not editing anything out?

Speaker 1:
[20:09] Y'all, I'm not even kidding. I could go for like a igloo right now.

Speaker 3:
[20:13] You're hot.

Speaker 4:
[20:14] You're burning up. Yes, I'm burning up.

Speaker 2:
[20:15] Drink the water.

Speaker 1:
[20:16] I'm not drinking that moon water.

Speaker 3:
[20:17] You mean some of that water.

Speaker 1:
[20:19] Landon, we sing about this hymn every single time we record. And I don't think after last night's activities, we need to be singing hymns. Actually, I think we need to sing three.

Speaker 2:
[20:29] I will sing.

Speaker 4:
[20:29] Take it away.

Speaker 3:
[20:30] Do you remember that song?

Speaker 4:
[20:32] Yes, I listened to it yesterday on the way home.

Speaker 2:
[20:35] I forgot the words. Let it spring up like a fountain over and over again.

Speaker 3:
[20:42] We're done singing.

Speaker 2:
[20:43] Okay. But let's talk about gas station food. Okay.

Speaker 3:
[20:48] There is nothing a chicken taquito on a QT roller will not fix for me.

Speaker 4:
[20:53] What is your-

Speaker 3:
[20:54] I love a chicken taquita.

Speaker 4:
[20:58] What is your go-to gas station snack?

Speaker 3:
[21:00] A chicken taquita.

Speaker 1:
[21:01] Your gas, write me through the list.

Speaker 4:
[21:04] What do you get whenever you really want something from the gas station on a road trip?

Speaker 2:
[21:08] On a road trip. Two Coca-Cola's. Two? It just depends on how long the road trip is. From here to Florida, two Cokes.

Speaker 4:
[21:16] I mean, we're stopping.

Speaker 2:
[21:17] Twin snake gummies.

Speaker 1:
[21:19] Oh, yes.

Speaker 2:
[21:20] Probably a purple bag of Doritos.

Speaker 4:
[21:22] I love those sweet and spicy Doritos.

Speaker 2:
[21:24] And if I'll go through the little debbie section and make sure they're fresh, and if they're good and fresh, I'll, and it's the summertime, I'll get a honey bun and set it up on the dash and let it get warm.

Speaker 4:
[21:34] Okay.

Speaker 2:
[21:34] And that's what I'll do.

Speaker 5:
[21:35] Do you like a pork rind?

Speaker 2:
[21:37] I love a pork rind.

Speaker 4:
[21:38] What are they called?

Speaker 5:
[21:39] Chicharonis?

Speaker 2:
[21:40] No.

Speaker 5:
[21:41] Yeah, that's what they're called, I think.

Speaker 2:
[21:43] I've never heard of that word.

Speaker 1:
[21:44] I think that's like the authentic name.

Speaker 2:
[21:46] A chicharoni?

Speaker 5:
[21:47] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[21:48] That sounds like a fucking pasta noodle.

Speaker 3:
[21:53] Are we getting a chicharon? Chicharon.

Speaker 2:
[21:56] What is that?

Speaker 1:
[21:59] It's a pork rind.

Speaker 6:
[22:00] It's a dish generally consisting of fried pork belly or fried pork rinds.

Speaker 3:
[22:06] Okay.

Speaker 2:
[22:06] I told you.

Speaker 6:
[22:07] Okay.

Speaker 3:
[22:08] Diverse or whatever.

Speaker 1:
[22:11] It says that on the pack. You just don't fucking read.

Speaker 2:
[22:16] What were we saying?

Speaker 5:
[22:18] Landon, just shut up.

Speaker 1:
[22:19] Don't tell me what you about said.

Speaker 5:
[22:21] Just shut up.

Speaker 3:
[22:24] You're cut off.

Speaker 5:
[22:25] Landon, shut up.

Speaker 6:
[22:34] Oh my god, he's gonna pop a blood vessel.

Speaker 4:
[22:40] If I went without oxygen for as long as you just did, I'd be dead on the floor.

Speaker 3:
[22:47] Okay, Trisha Payne. Oh! Okay. Damn, Daniel.

Speaker 1:
[22:54] What were we talking about?

Speaker 2:
[22:55] Gas station, what's your gas station for?

Speaker 5:
[22:57] I don't know, do you like those little, do you remember, this reminded me of a story we can tell.

Speaker 4:
[23:02] Do you remember those little coconut donuts?

Speaker 1:
[23:05] Yeah, sure do! We were sitting one time, me and Landon went to the same middle school for one year and then I hated every one of those bastards and I left. And I went to the school up the road and it was much better.

Speaker 2:
[23:17] And I was in sixth grade and some teacher pissed me off or something, I don't know what happened.

Speaker 3:
[23:21] And what'd I do?

Speaker 1:
[23:23] You threw a donut at her and she's pregnant.

Speaker 2:
[23:25] I slung shot a damn coconut donut straight at that bitch's pregnant belly.

Speaker 3:
[23:31] I sure did. Sixth grade.

Speaker 2:
[23:33] She hated to see me coming down the hall. I didn't get in trouble there.

Speaker 1:
[23:36] And she was a good teacher.

Speaker 3:
[23:37] Love her.

Speaker 5:
[23:38] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[23:39] She just made me mad that day.

Speaker 5:
[23:39] Miss Milliken?

Speaker 3:
[23:40] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[23:42] Landon, sorry.

Speaker 3:
[23:43] Oh, I'm not.

Speaker 2:
[23:48] If you've done something to piss me off.

Speaker 4:
[23:49] Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1:
[23:50] I'll throw something.

Speaker 4:
[23:51] I don't know.

Speaker 1:
[23:51] My gas station order. I love a Dorito.

Speaker 2:
[23:54] A Dorito.

Speaker 1:
[23:54] Any flavor, really.

Speaker 2:
[23:55] A Dorito has never done me dirty. Never will.

Speaker 4:
[23:58] The best thing Taco Bell ever did was make a cool ranch Dorito taco.

Speaker 2:
[24:00] And then they got rid of it. It's not on the menu anymore. I'm a frequent Taco Bell.

Speaker 4:
[24:07] Y'all bitches.

Speaker 2:
[24:09] They also got rid of the chicken taquitas. That was so funny to say that.

Speaker 3:
[24:13] Taquita.

Speaker 4:
[24:13] Taquita.

Speaker 3:
[24:14] Chicken taquita.

Speaker 1:
[24:15] Me and Landon used to go to get those rolled chicken tacos. Like we would go to the basketball game at our high school.

Speaker 2:
[24:22] Oh, my gosh. I know what we can talk about, but continue.

Speaker 1:
[24:25] And we would order like eight of them a piece.

Speaker 2:
[24:31] Five years ago, what grade were we in?

Speaker 1:
[24:35] Um, I was graduated. Hey, Riley, what did we do?

Speaker 4:
[24:44] It was cool to come out on party.

Speaker 1:
[24:47] Yeah, Landon found a video of us in college.

Speaker 2:
[24:50] College? Yeah, no, this was five years ago. We was not in college.

Speaker 1:
[24:53] We were going to Dalton State.

Speaker 2:
[24:55] Yes, we were. If I looked like that in college, somebody should have shot me.

Speaker 5:
[25:01] You did. Newsflash, I hate to break it to you. Why do you think we would go all the way to Chattanooga from Lafette?

Speaker 2:
[25:07] Because we did it every day. More of the story is, we skipped school to go to Olive Garden.

Speaker 1:
[25:12] I would skip school to go to the bathroom.

Speaker 2:
[25:19] I used to log in to my mom's e-mail and send an e-mail from her e-mail telling y'all that I could leave school and check out. I used to write me a slip and I used to check out every day. Every single day.

Speaker 1:
[25:32] I don't even think I would do that because I was the favorite. I think I could just leave sometimes.

Speaker 5:
[25:38] But I will say that-

Speaker 2:
[25:39] Are you okay? Sometimes I can just leave sometimes.

Speaker 1:
[25:43] I'm trying to recollect my story over here.

Speaker 4:
[25:45] You're acting a little-

Speaker 5:
[25:47] Well, bitch, I am.

Speaker 1:
[25:53] Bye. That's Madea.

Speaker 4:
[25:56] But I was trying-

Speaker 2:
[25:58] Madea, let's go ahead and do it again.

Speaker 5:
[25:59] No.

Speaker 1:
[26:02] I lost my train of thought.

Speaker 4:
[26:03] What were we talking about?

Speaker 6:
[26:04] Skip school, go to the bathroom.

Speaker 2:
[26:05] Skip school, get your shit together.

Speaker 4:
[26:06] One time, I won't name the school and I will not name the person.

Speaker 1:
[26:10] You can not waterboard out of me because I love them. But one time I had like 13 absences and I ran the blood drive at school and I told someone that if they erased all of my absences, I would get them a blanket from the blood assurance bus.

Speaker 4:
[26:27] I didn't take finals.

Speaker 2:
[26:28] I had at least like 80 absences in senior year.

Speaker 1:
[26:31] She wiped every absence from my record for a $5 blanket.

Speaker 2:
[26:38] She done it because she loved us.

Speaker 1:
[26:39] I know. That's why I'm not going to tell you who it was.

Speaker 2:
[26:42] Mine was too much to wipe. I missed like 60, 70 days of senior year.

Speaker 1:
[26:46] So the Board of Education, if you see this and you want to fire somebody, you need to worry about nobody fucking graduate in high school. Not my absences getting wiped because I didn't take finals.

Speaker 2:
[26:55] I don't even think that made sense.

Speaker 1:
[26:59] Our Board of Education loves to stir this fucking pot.

Speaker 2:
[27:02] I do too.

Speaker 3:
[27:03] Are you a pot stirrer?

Speaker 1:
[27:04] I love to stir the pot. I love to cook too.

Speaker 4:
[27:07] But I love to stir the pot.

Speaker 3:
[27:11] Okay.

Speaker 1:
[27:11] I hate when... I love you guys, but I hate whenever somebody with being a smartass, or might just be stupid, get in the comments. And people are like, like we made the video one time about chips and the Doritos having too much air in the bag. And those bitches, Bill and all the science guys in there saying, it's actually not nitrogen gas.

Speaker 2:
[27:34] We're going to start a new segment too and read our comments because it makes me giggle. But we'll do it later. We're just doing this one today. Our clip about the ranch on how we didn't want damn Greek yogurt ranch, we don't want a salad, a dill, whatever the hell we said. Or somebody commented and said, or I can make it however the fuck I want to make it and probably still kick your ass in a fight.

Speaker 3:
[27:58] Over ranch?

Speaker 2:
[28:00] Bitch, I wish you would try to kick my ass in a fight.

Speaker 3:
[28:02] I will shank you.

Speaker 2:
[28:04] Good Godamati. Anyways.

Speaker 1:
[28:05] Well, we're going to get taken out of the monetization program for violence.

Speaker 2:
[28:10] Will that get us banned? No. You don't even have to use Greek yogurt, but Hidden Valley is trash. Those are fighting grounds. I'll shank you too.

Speaker 1:
[28:18] Yeah, I will do over some Hidden Valley ranch.

Speaker 2:
[28:22] And someone said this, don't come at me with no damn craft generic ranch foul.

Speaker 1:
[28:27] Yeah, don't ever look at me. Speaking of that, my grandparents, my grandpa is cheap, OK? And they have money. Like, I don't know why they're so cheap. That's probably why they have money, because they're cheap. He buys great value mayonnaise.

Speaker 2:
[28:42] Miracle Whip. No, bitch, we're making Miracle Whip. If some, you can take the miracle and the whip and shove it straight up your ass, OK?

Speaker 1:
[28:51] Yeah, somebody needs to beat your ass with Miracle Whip.

Speaker 6:
[28:56] Oh, you're just kicking back.

Speaker 1:
[28:58] Just get comfortable. Yeah, don't ever look at me and say, do you want Miracle Whip? Hell no. I want to close my eyes and perform a miracle and make you disappear, bitch. I don't want no damn Miracle Whip.

Speaker 3:
[29:12] I'd do a back handspring, back tuck for some Dukes, though. Hey, Dukes is pretty good.

Speaker 2:
[29:16] Dukes mayonnaise makes you look... And I like Hellman's too. I like any kind of mayonnaise unless it's Miracle Whip.

Speaker 1:
[29:20] I fuck heavy with Kraft mayonnaise.

Speaker 2:
[29:23] I fuck heavy with Kraft mayonnaise too. I like any kind of mayonnaise as long as it's not Miracle Whip.

Speaker 1:
[29:28] I think Kraft mayonnaise got me by the throat.

Speaker 2:
[29:30] Do you put mayonnaise on a hot dog?

Speaker 1:
[29:34] I mean, I'm not opposed to it. I think I'd put mayonnaise in cereal, to be honest. I love that shit. Like literally, don't even look at me and have mustard in your pad, but I could fuck up mayonnaise. Mustard in your what? Don't even be thinking about mustard when you're looking at me, but I can fuck up mayonnaise. I don't even like ketchup.

Speaker 2:
[29:50] Oh, I hate mustard.

Speaker 1:
[29:51] I don't even like ketchup.

Speaker 4:
[29:52] I do like mustard on a sausage biscuit.

Speaker 2:
[29:55] I hate ketchup.

Speaker 1:
[29:55] I like mustard on a sausage biscuit. Yeah, ketchup's gross. Not to mention, especially like when you go to McDonald's and you order a like a.

Speaker 4:
[30:06] Sorry.

Speaker 1:
[30:07] And you order like a burger and there's about four pounds of ketchup on it.

Speaker 2:
[30:14] I have to poop.

Speaker 3:
[30:18] Consider this episode fucked.

Speaker 1:
[30:23] Anyways, I think we've talked about everything that we shouldn't talk about today.

Speaker 3:
[30:27] I don't think we have.

Speaker 2:
[30:28] I think this is going great.

Speaker 1:
[30:29] People are going to think that we're alcoholics.

Speaker 4:
[30:32] People are going to think that we have lost our mind.

Speaker 2:
[30:34] They don't even thought that, but go ahead. As long as they know that I will never f*** a miracle whip, I don't care what they say about me. Put that on my tombstone.

Speaker 3:
[30:43] Landon did not f*** a miracle whip.

Speaker 5:
[30:47] There's some people that like, oh my gosh, miracle whip is so good.

Speaker 1:
[30:51] Bitch, who hurt you? What kind of trauma do you have to go through in your life to cope with f***ing miracle whip? Because you need to be on Dr. Phil.

Speaker 3:
[30:59] You know what I just thought of?

Speaker 5:
[31:01] What?

Speaker 3:
[31:02] The pictures in the background are literally torn out of a magazine.

Speaker 5:
[31:07] Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1:
[31:07] I asked Erin the other day where she got the pictures, she said, I got a magazine and I ripped it out and I framed it.

Speaker 2:
[31:16] This is the best damn thing I've ever seen in my life.

Speaker 1:
[31:18] I think it's iconic. I'm about to go buy some magazines and some frames. I don't know. It's probably Henry's brother than when they invented the automobile.

Speaker 2:
[31:28] Coco Chanel.

Speaker 3:
[31:31] Okay, Kris Jenner.

Speaker 2:
[31:32] Coco Chanel.

Speaker 3:
[31:34] Louise Vuitton.

Speaker 1:
[31:35] I seen Kris Jenner making a martini the other day. It's just vodka. It's just vodka and then she takes olives and she just goes like this and wafts olives.

Speaker 2:
[31:44] No, she don't. She pours vodka and then puts one olive on a skewer and puts it in her drink. So she just drinks vodka. But would you not drink that much vodka if you had to deal with all them children and manage all their businesses?

Speaker 1:
[31:57] At that point, Landon just walked into the CVS and get some Isopropyl alcohol and just drink it.

Speaker 2:
[32:03] Just drink it.

Speaker 4:
[32:04] Put some mea in.

Speaker 2:
[32:05] So it just popped in my head but I have to tell you later.

Speaker 4:
[32:07] What?

Speaker 2:
[32:11] Anyways, are you ready for our new segment?

Speaker 4:
[32:14] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[32:15] Pass the finger and the glasses.

Speaker 4:
[32:18] Riley forgot his glasses. No, we didn't forget them. I couldn't find them.

Speaker 2:
[32:22] He didn't forget them. We couldn't find them. Okay. This is the dumbest shit y'all have ever seen in your life.

Speaker 4:
[32:29] Y'all keep the finger since you bought the glasses.

Speaker 2:
[32:30] Why are they so dirty?

Speaker 1:
[32:32] Bitch, they came from Amazon.

Speaker 2:
[32:33] On accident. Well, if you sat on these and made them this dirty, you need to go wipe your ass.

Speaker 6:
[32:39] I got swamp ass a little bit.

Speaker 3:
[32:41] I mean, it might be a little hot in here.

Speaker 2:
[32:44] That industrial box fan might not be a bad idea.

Speaker 1:
[32:47] Yeah, I'm telling you right now, I would fuck hard with a hot fish.

Speaker 3:
[32:50] I'm hot.

Speaker 1:
[32:50] With central heat now. Well, he's got septic or something.

Speaker 3:
[32:53] He died last night.

Speaker 2:
[32:54] He's septic if he's cold.

Speaker 3:
[32:56] If he's cold, he is one foot in the grave because it is hot as hell in here.

Speaker 1:
[32:59] It's not because it's hot in here.

Speaker 3:
[33:02] This set is melting.

Speaker 2:
[33:03] He's going to die if he's cold. He is a vampire because no way.

Speaker 3:
[33:08] Where's my finger?

Speaker 5:
[33:10] I've got your finger because you've got the glasses.

Speaker 2:
[33:12] No, I'm getting a finger, bitch. No, I brought your...

Speaker 1:
[33:14] I gave you both fingers.

Speaker 2:
[33:15] What am I even going to do with this finger?

Speaker 3:
[33:18] Stick it where the sun don't shine.

Speaker 1:
[33:21] Okay, we have come up with a new...

Speaker 4:
[33:23] Oh, the last thing...

Speaker 2:
[33:25] I don't even remember the intro.

Speaker 1:
[33:27] Well, I chat GPT'd some questions, but the last thing on ChatGPT...

Speaker 2:
[33:31] Maddie, my angel, thank you so much.

Speaker 1:
[33:34] Maddie's iconic, by the way, if y'all don't know. I didn't know we were jousting, bitch. I feel like I'm in medieval times. I went to pull up the questions, and the last thing I looked up on ChatGPT is, is it possible to pass out from a hangover? And that's on anxiety, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[33:52] What is our intro? You're reading it. Welcome to the Bloodline Brain Check.

Speaker 1:
[33:58] Oh, hold up.

Speaker 2:
[34:00] This segment is called the Bloodline Brain Check, and it's kind of like a spinoff of Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader, but it's just pretty much going to be Are You... I don't know.

Speaker 1:
[34:08] We are starting a new segment called Bloodline Brain Check.

Speaker 2:
[34:11] We've said that four times.

Speaker 1:
[34:13] Well, bitch, I don't know what we're cutting out and what we're not, so just let me... Thank you.

Speaker 5:
[34:18] Shut the fuck up. Okay.

Speaker 1:
[34:24] Let me just say this before we start our new segment. Landon texted me like the intro because he came up with it because he'd be working over time. And right under that, he texted me and he said, don't answer you dumb f**k, you dumb f**k, mother f**ker, you dumb crazy hoe.

Speaker 5:
[34:41] I said that?

Speaker 1:
[34:42] Yes, you did Jack Jack. And I said, I had my phone to my ear. He said, no, you can't answer. What are you doing? You should be completely ashamed of yourself. My phone was in the living room and I was probably in the shower.

Speaker 2:
[34:58] Anyways, read the intro.

Speaker 1:
[34:59] Okay. Welcome to the Bloodline Brain Check where I'm reading this off my phone. Welcome to the Bloodline Brain Check where we test each other on general knowledge, real-world co- I can't even read, Landon. You read it. No, you got it. No, you got it.

Speaker 5:
[35:13] Keep going.

Speaker 2:
[35:15] Young Sheldon. Read this shit.

Speaker 1:
[35:21] Welcome to the Bloodline Brain Check where we test each other on general questions, real-world knowledge, pop culture, and things that every adult should know, but somehow we probably don't.

Speaker 2:
[35:31] Okay.

Speaker 3:
[35:31] Did you prepare the questions?

Speaker 1:
[35:33] Yes, I did. Chat GPT did. Y'all, I'm struggling. Okay. I'm barely made it here this morning.

Speaker 4:
[35:41] What is the... Okay, hold up.

Speaker 1:
[35:43] They don't have answers on here.

Speaker 2:
[35:44] Well, I know the answers. Just ask me.

Speaker 4:
[35:46] What is the plural of mouse, Landon?

Speaker 2:
[35:48] Mice.

Speaker 1:
[35:51] Right?

Speaker 2:
[35:52] I think that's right. Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[35:54] What did you think?

Speaker 1:
[35:55] Meese.

Speaker 2:
[35:56] What?

Speaker 3:
[35:58] In the Betty Crocker bullshit, are you smoking today?

Speaker 1:
[36:02] My girlfriend's a teacher.

Speaker 2:
[36:04] Shut the phone. You've got the questions. And I hope they're a little harder than that. Because if you don't know that, then you just need to go to jail.

Speaker 4:
[36:14] I really was thinking last, this morning, whenever I was looking up, I was like, Meese?

Speaker 2:
[36:19] Mice.

Speaker 4:
[36:20] Bitch.

Speaker 2:
[36:21] He's quitting after this.

Speaker 5:
[36:23] What is the plural?

Speaker 1:
[36:24] This is either the best or worst day he's ever had.

Speaker 4:
[36:27] What is the plural of phenomenon? And I think this says pneumonia.

Speaker 5:
[36:34] I can't really see. Does that say pneumonia?

Speaker 1:
[36:37] Why are you asking me grammar?

Speaker 5:
[36:38] I don't know, Landon.

Speaker 1:
[36:40] GPT is asking you grammar.

Speaker 3:
[36:42] What is the plural of phenomenon?

Speaker 1:
[36:44] We can look at questions and then we can both answer. I'm sorry, I'm really passive at that.

Speaker 2:
[36:49] Phenomena. It's phenomena.

Speaker 1:
[36:51] No, it's phenomena, I think.

Speaker 2:
[36:52] It is not. Oh. What is it?

Speaker 3:
[36:57] I thought it was phenomena.

Speaker 2:
[36:59] It is. Phenomena.

Speaker 1:
[37:02] Okay, what river is the longest in the world?

Speaker 2:
[37:06] The...

Speaker 3:
[37:07] hold on, let me think. Get all my rivers in line.

Speaker 4:
[37:14] Did you know of two?

Speaker 1:
[37:15] The Tennessee and the Mississippi.

Speaker 2:
[37:16] And the Chattahoochee, motherfucker.

Speaker 4:
[37:19] You only know that from the song.

Speaker 2:
[37:20] What is the longest river in the world? The Nile River.

Speaker 3:
[37:24] Yeah, you're right. Really?

Speaker 1:
[37:25] Yeah. You think he has a win in Powerball Ticket?

Speaker 3:
[37:31] I do.

Speaker 2:
[37:32] I'm smarter than I thought I was.

Speaker 1:
[37:34] What country has the most population?

Speaker 2:
[37:39] China.

Speaker 3:
[37:39] No.

Speaker 2:
[37:42] It's definitely not the US.

Speaker 4:
[37:44] India.

Speaker 2:
[37:45] India?

Speaker 3:
[37:47] Really?

Speaker 4:
[37:48] Yeah. What line divides the earth into northern and southern hemispheres?

Speaker 2:
[37:56] The...

Speaker 3:
[37:57] Say that again? Hey!

Speaker 2:
[37:59] Can I answer the question and ask the question again?

Speaker 4:
[38:01] What line divides the earth into northern and southern hemispheres?

Speaker 2:
[38:05] It's not the equator.

Speaker 3:
[38:08] Right? Landon. Is it the equator?

Speaker 1:
[38:10] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[38:11] I thought that was like the center of the earth where it's real hot. It is. But it's called the equator?

Speaker 1:
[38:16] Yeah.

Speaker 2:
[38:17] The line is called the equator? Yeah.

Speaker 1:
[38:19] Oh. What do you think it was called?

Speaker 2:
[38:21] Ms. Palmer would be so disappointed in me.

Speaker 5:
[38:23] But she taught biology.

Speaker 1:
[38:26] You don't learn about the equator in biology.

Speaker 2:
[38:29] She's Ms. Frizzle, though.

Speaker 1:
[38:30] You don't learn about it.

Speaker 2:
[38:30] She taught about everything.

Speaker 1:
[38:31] I love her.

Speaker 2:
[38:32] I learned how to dissect a starfish in her class.

Speaker 1:
[38:36] Oh my gosh. One time, I didn't know we were dissecting. We're going off on a tangent. One time, I didn't know I was dissecting something in life science seventh grade.

Speaker 2:
[38:44] What was it? A cat or a pig?

Speaker 1:
[38:46] I walked in and there was a cat spread out like this, right next to the door.

Speaker 2:
[38:54] Funny story, my parents were on a meat processing plant. They also used to dissect cow eyeballs. We used to get the cow eyeballs at our meat processing plant and put them in formaldehyde in jars.

Speaker 1:
[39:03] It's formaldehyde.

Speaker 2:
[39:05] Flemaldehyde?

Speaker 1:
[39:06] Not fle, formaldehyde.

Speaker 2:
[39:08] Are you sure?

Speaker 1:
[39:09] Positive.

Speaker 2:
[39:10] Is he right? You look smart.

Speaker 1:
[39:13] Yeah, I think anybody knows that. I think Jack the Raper knows that. Ask me one more question.

Speaker 2:
[39:17] Ask me another question. No, ask me nothing about history. All I know is if you...

Speaker 1:
[39:24] What force opposes motion between two surfaces?

Speaker 2:
[39:27] Say that again?

Speaker 4:
[39:28] What force opposes motion between two surfaces?

Speaker 2:
[39:31] Friction.

Speaker 1:
[39:32] Yeah, I did not expect you to get that.

Speaker 3:
[39:34] Yeah. Give me a good one.

Speaker 2:
[39:38] That was easy.

Speaker 4:
[39:39] What is the function of red blood cells?

Speaker 2:
[39:43] The function of red blood cells? To circulate oxygen.

Speaker 1:
[39:47] I can't believe he knows this yet.

Speaker 2:
[39:49] White blood cells are to fight off, like, help your immune system.

Speaker 1:
[39:53] That's because he wanted to be a rheumatologist and cure arthritis one time.

Speaker 2:
[39:57] No, that's what it does. It carries oxygen through your body.

Speaker 1:
[40:01] What type of...

Speaker 2:
[40:01] And it's actually blue in your body, and then oxygen hits it on the outside of your red.

Speaker 1:
[40:06] Well, damn, Derek Shepherd.

Speaker 2:
[40:10] Anyway, let's go ahead.

Speaker 1:
[40:12] What type of energy is stored in food?

Speaker 2:
[40:18] Kinetic is in motion, so it's not that.

Speaker 1:
[40:20] I'm actually impressed.

Speaker 3:
[40:22] Like...

Speaker 2:
[40:22] Oh, shit, I'm having a...

Speaker 3:
[40:26] I want go...

Speaker 2:
[40:26] Can you give me some options?

Speaker 1:
[40:29] If I heard the word... I can't give you options because I don't know more options than things.

Speaker 2:
[40:33] If I heard the word, well, it's not kinetic because that is energy in motion. Give me some options. Somebody give me, like, ABC choice.

Speaker 6:
[40:44] Like static?

Speaker 2:
[40:45] It's not static.

Speaker 1:
[40:47] Static, nuclear or chemical?

Speaker 2:
[40:50] Stored in food? Nuclear. Chemical.

Speaker 1:
[40:53] Bitches, you just go boom when you eat your chicken sandwich.

Speaker 2:
[40:56] That's not even answers. Do you know the answer? What is it?

Speaker 1:
[41:00] It's chemical.

Speaker 2:
[41:02] Oh.

Speaker 5:
[41:02] Are you going to ask me some?

Speaker 2:
[41:04] Yeah, give me your phone.

Speaker 1:
[41:07] I need the glasses. I need to lock in.

Speaker 2:
[41:09] Okay, lock in. Lock in. What's the capital of Canada?

Speaker 1:
[41:18] Ontario.

Speaker 2:
[41:19] No.

Speaker 1:
[41:20] Alberta?

Speaker 2:
[41:20] No.

Speaker 1:
[41:21] Montreal?

Speaker 2:
[41:21] No.

Speaker 3:
[41:23] You just named a whole family of four.

Speaker 1:
[41:27] I just named more Canadian provinces than Katy Perry, and she's fucking the Prime Minister.

Speaker 2:
[41:33] Well, you got all of them wrong. Would you like to answer?

Speaker 1:
[41:35] Yeah.

Speaker 3:
[41:36] Ottawa.

Speaker 5:
[41:38] Or however you say that.

Speaker 1:
[41:39] When I think of Ottawa, I think of an Ouala, the water bottle.

Speaker 2:
[41:44] You're never going to get this one, but I knew this, by the way. What's the largest desert in the world?

Speaker 1:
[41:49] The Sahara?

Speaker 2:
[41:50] No.

Speaker 1:
[41:50] The Mojave?

Speaker 2:
[41:54] No.

Speaker 3:
[41:55] Oh.

Speaker 2:
[41:57] No. Nobody's ever going to get it.

Speaker 1:
[41:59] New Mexico?

Speaker 2:
[42:00] The largest desert in the world.

Speaker 3:
[42:02] Coachella. Coachella.

Speaker 1:
[42:05] Okay. We're talking about that.

Speaker 2:
[42:06] Okay. We'll pause. Let's talk about it on the second episode. Or we can talk about it on the second episode. It's Antarctica.

Speaker 1:
[42:12] That ain't no fucking desert, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[42:13] Yes, it is.

Speaker 5:
[42:14] Oh, hell no.

Speaker 6:
[42:16] It's an Arctic desert.

Speaker 1:
[42:20] Boom.

Speaker 2:
[42:22] What country is both in Europe and Asia?

Speaker 1:
[42:27] I'm dumber than fuck.

Speaker 5:
[42:29] I don't...

Speaker 2:
[42:30] Turkey. Not ham. Turkey. Okay.

Speaker 1:
[42:36] Landon, how many people just study fucking turkey?

Speaker 2:
[42:39] Give me some about...

Speaker 1:
[42:40] I don't even like turkey on Thanksgiving.

Speaker 2:
[42:43] Or history.

Speaker 1:
[42:44] Much less damn... Landon, you can't even get mad at me because you didn't even know Abraham Lincoln got assassinated.

Speaker 4:
[42:52] What is the powerhouse of the cell?

Speaker 1:
[42:54] The mitochondria, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[42:58] What type of blood vessels carry blood away from your heart?

Speaker 1:
[43:02] Veins.

Speaker 2:
[43:02] No.

Speaker 4:
[43:05] Away from your heart?

Speaker 2:
[43:06] Yeah. What type of blood vessels carry blood away from the heart?

Speaker 1:
[43:10] Not veins.

Speaker 4:
[43:10] What are they called?

Speaker 2:
[43:13] Away.

Speaker 1:
[43:15] I know the answer.

Speaker 4:
[43:16] Like, I just can't think of what it's called.

Speaker 2:
[43:22] Riley, it's away from the heart.

Speaker 1:
[43:25] Landon, my brain is not functioning at 100% today.

Speaker 2:
[43:30] This is easy.

Speaker 1:
[43:31] I know it is. And I know the answer, but I can't think of it.

Speaker 2:
[43:35] Arteries.

Speaker 5:
[43:36] Yeah, I knew that.

Speaker 1:
[43:37] I swear to God, I knew it.

Speaker 2:
[43:40] What is, oh, this is an easy one. It's taking it back to like third grade. If you don't know this.

Speaker 5:
[43:44] What?

Speaker 2:
[43:45] What is the process by which plants convert sunlight into energy? Photosynthesis.

Speaker 3:
[43:50] Yes! High five!

Speaker 2:
[44:01] Damn.

Speaker 3:
[44:03] Damn. If you don't know what is H2O more commonly known as, you have unfortunately been deemed dumber and bugged.

Speaker 2:
[44:14] Yes. What organ is primarily responsible for detoxifying chemicals in the body? The liver?

Speaker 3:
[44:22] Yes.

Speaker 2:
[44:22] You about said the kidney, but it was the liver, you're right. Okay. We're getting into one more question, and this is a history question, and you wanted to be a history teacher, so you should know this. Who wrote the Declaration of Independence?

Speaker 4:
[44:36] Thomas Jefferson.

Speaker 2:
[44:37] Yes. If I wouldn't have seen that, I would have said-

Speaker 4:
[44:41] Who has the biggest signature on the Declaration of Independence?

Speaker 2:
[44:44] I don't know. John Hancock. I don't think I read the Declaration of Independence.

Speaker 4:
[44:49] Have you ever seen it in real life?

Speaker 2:
[44:51] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[44:53] No, you haven't.

Speaker 2:
[44:53] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[44:56] You're lying.

Speaker 3:
[44:56] No, I'm not.

Speaker 2:
[44:57] It's in DC.

Speaker 4:
[44:58] You went?

Speaker 3:
[44:59] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[45:00] With who?

Speaker 2:
[45:02] I've been two or three times.

Speaker 3:
[45:07] You didn't know that?

Speaker 4:
[45:08] I didn't know you had ever seen it. I've seen it. I just didn't know if you had.

Speaker 2:
[45:10] Yeah, I've seen the Declaration of Independence. It's a declaration that broke independence from Britain.

Speaker 4:
[45:15] Okay.

Speaker 2:
[45:16] Is that right?

Speaker 1:
[45:16] Alexander Graham, I mean, Aaron Burr or Alexander Hamilton?

Speaker 2:
[45:20] Okay, I think we should do one more question. What year did the Titanic sink?

Speaker 4:
[45:24] I don't know.

Speaker 2:
[45:26] Guess.

Speaker 5:
[45:27] 1492? Bitch, that's like Christopher Columbus down the Great Blue Sea.

Speaker 1:
[45:32] He probably passed it coming in.

Speaker 3:
[45:34] No, he definitely didn't.

Speaker 1:
[45:36] He's probably like, you rich bastards.

Speaker 2:
[45:39] He definitely didn't. I'm pretty sure, well, Christopher Columbus' boat in 1492 was a hell of a lot better than the Titanic because that shit didn't sink. But they sunk the Titanic on purpose.

Speaker 1:
[45:49] Yeah, there was a bunch of rich people on it.

Speaker 2:
[45:52] It was only like elite families. They definitely sunk it.

Speaker 1:
[45:54] It was probably Hillary Clinton. Allegedly for educational purposes only.

Speaker 2:
[45:59] Hey, like the JP. Morgan was on there, I think.

Speaker 1:
[46:02] Yeah, I was definitely on there.

Speaker 2:
[46:03] Morgan from Morgan & Morgan? No, like JP. Morgan, the damn bank.

Speaker 1:
[46:08] Morgan?

Speaker 3:
[46:09] That's Morgan and Morgan.

Speaker 2:
[46:14] Okay, 1912.

Speaker 1:
[46:16] Landon, who in the hell knows that?

Speaker 2:
[46:20] Who's the father of our country? Who was known as the father of our country?

Speaker 1:
[46:24] Well, if you asked Donald Trump, it would be him. But he also, you know, cured cancer and set the... That is getting on my nerves so bad.

Speaker 4:
[46:34] Um, the father of our country. Jesus Christ.

Speaker 2:
[46:38] Well, of course.

Speaker 1:
[46:39] It should be, but it ain't, because y'all are all going to hell. Our leaders are all going to hell. George Washington.

Speaker 2:
[46:49] Do you want one more question or no?

Speaker 1:
[46:51] Yeah, sure. Why not hell? Let me redeem myself. Double or all or nothing.

Speaker 2:
[46:54] What category? History. Or we don't have to do school questions. We can do like...

Speaker 4:
[47:01] Just ask me something, Landon. I don't care.

Speaker 2:
[47:02] Who said it? Die with a good Snapchat going through.

Speaker 4:
[47:05] You.

Speaker 2:
[47:07] And I am honored that you would say that about me.

Speaker 4:
[47:11] No, it was Courtney Kardashian, wasn't it?

Speaker 2:
[47:12] No.

Speaker 4:
[47:13] Kim?

Speaker 2:
[47:13] It was Khloe. I don't fucking know the names. And that got that straight out of my brain. You don't know stuff like that?

Speaker 1:
[47:19] Landon, I don't watch reality TV.

Speaker 2:
[47:21] Oh, I love reality TV. Speaking of reality TV. Well, I can't announce that yet, but...

Speaker 4:
[47:25] We're having a special guest on the podcast, so drop who you think it is in the comments below.

Speaker 2:
[47:30] Yeah, drop who you think is coming on the podcast. It is from a reality television show. Probably the best reality television show I've ever watched in my life. Funny as hell. And y'all are going to shit yourself. And it's not Todd Chrisley. Everybody guessed that already. Yeah. Equally as iconic, though. What were we saying? One more. What category? Hurry, tell me.

Speaker 4:
[47:54] I don't care.

Speaker 1:
[47:55] History. Science.

Speaker 4:
[47:56] Give me a science question. I was pretty good at science in school.

Speaker 1:
[47:59] I remembered a lot from dissecting that.

Speaker 2:
[48:01] What clouds, this is coming straight from my brain. What clouds are thin and wispy?

Speaker 1:
[48:06] Stratus clouds.

Speaker 2:
[48:07] No. They're thin and they look wispy.

Speaker 1:
[48:13] Are you sure?

Speaker 2:
[48:13] Yeah. A stratus cloud is, what is a stratus cloud? A stratus cloud is when the sky is completely gray and they only produce rain and sleet.

Speaker 1:
[48:22] Hey, James Spann.

Speaker 2:
[48:23] And all that.

Speaker 4:
[48:23] Calm down. You're up here.

Speaker 2:
[48:25] A thin wispy cloud.

Speaker 1:
[48:27] Paul Barus.

Speaker 2:
[48:28] There's only four types of clouds, Riley. Chileanimbus, stratus, cumulus and the word itself just means, it don't mean, but it just makes you think wisp. A cirrus cloud. Do y'all know that?

Speaker 1:
[48:41] When I hear cirrus, I think either a circus or cirrhosis of the liver. That's what I hear them go whenever I hear the word cirrus or cirrously.

Speaker 2:
[48:51] Cirrus?

Speaker 1:
[48:52] That's Medea saying cirrus, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[48:54] Oh, I feel like you know this. I don't know why I feel like you know this, but what part of the brain controls balance and coordination?

Speaker 1:
[48:59] I don't know, but mine's fucked up today.

Speaker 4:
[49:02] Uh, is it the, um, Medeala?

Speaker 2:
[49:06] No.

Speaker 4:
[49:06] The frontal cortex?

Speaker 2:
[49:09] What part of the brain controls balance and coordination? It starts with a C.

Speaker 4:
[49:13] Cerebrum?

Speaker 2:
[49:14] No. Close. It's like, I think you just mispronounced it.

Speaker 1:
[49:17] Cerebellum?

Speaker 2:
[49:18] Yes. That was good.

Speaker 1:
[49:21] I literally think I was Miranda Bailey in my last life. Um, I love that bitch.

Speaker 2:
[49:26] Well, I think- What type of energy is in motion?

Speaker 1:
[49:29] Kinetic.

Speaker 3:
[49:30] Good.

Speaker 2:
[49:31] What is the hardest natural substance on earth?

Speaker 3:
[49:36] What were you thinking? What were you thinking? I can't tell you.

Speaker 4:
[49:42] Um, a rock.

Speaker 3:
[49:44] What-

Speaker 2:
[49:46] What's the hardest natural substance on earth?

Speaker 4:
[49:49] Um, I don't know. A diamond?

Speaker 3:
[49:53] Yes.

Speaker 4:
[49:56] I knew that.

Speaker 2:
[49:58] What organ produces insulin?

Speaker 4:
[50:00] Insulin in the pancreas.

Speaker 2:
[50:01] Okay. What is the name of the galaxy we live in?

Speaker 4:
[50:04] The Milky Way.

Speaker 2:
[50:04] What happens to water when it reaches zero degrees Celsius? Stibbles.

Speaker 3:
[50:08] No.

Speaker 2:
[50:10] It freezes.

Speaker 1:
[50:17] We're not in fucking Europe, bitch. I don't use Celsius.

Speaker 2:
[50:19] What mineral is essential for strong bones and teeth?

Speaker 3:
[50:22] Hold up.

Speaker 1:
[50:23] We poured tea in the harbor, said that I didn't have to answer that fucking question. I don't-

Speaker 2:
[50:29] What mineral is essential for strong bones and teeth?

Speaker 1:
[50:32] Calcium.

Speaker 2:
[50:33] Yeah, and I have calcium deposits on my teeth. Look at them. I need to go and grind them off.

Speaker 1:
[50:37] We didn't know until you said that, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[50:39] Speaking of my teeth, I got Invisalign.

Speaker 1:
[50:40] Oh, I have Invisalign consultation in the morning.

Speaker 2:
[50:42] I lost that shit already and I'm only on week one.

Speaker 1:
[50:44] Hey, question.

Speaker 2:
[50:45] When do these teeth move?

Speaker 4:
[50:46] How long did you have to wait to get your Invisalign after you had your consultation? Four weeks.

Speaker 2:
[50:49] Becky's calling.

Speaker 4:
[50:51] It's probably not Becky.

Speaker 1:
[50:52] It's probably the kid in her class.

Speaker 2:
[50:54] I'm answering.

Speaker 4:
[50:55] Don't answer.

Speaker 2:
[50:57] Hey. Hey, we're recording the podcast. I'll talk to you later. Love you. Bye.

Speaker 1:
[51:05] My girlfriend has a little kid in her class and she calls me every day.

Speaker 2:
[51:08] School's concluded by the way. What kind of questions y'all want us to answer next though? Tell us that like pop culture, how do you change a tire?

Speaker 1:
[51:23] Y'all want me to answer.

Speaker 2:
[51:24] Dad, do you want to know how to change a tire? You jack the car up.

Speaker 4:
[51:28] Landon, you're going to embarrass yourself.

Speaker 2:
[51:30] No, I'm not. Then you literally just unscrew the little, what are they called? Lug nuts?

Speaker 1:
[51:35] You don't do it with your hand, bitch.

Speaker 2:
[51:37] No, you don't, but I have a thing in mind.

Speaker 4:
[51:38] We talked about this in the last episode.

Speaker 2:
[51:40] I don't use that manual shit. I have that electronic...

Speaker 1:
[51:43] You have a Tesla, bitch. You press the button and wait 30 minutes until somebody comes with a car on a truck.

Speaker 2:
[51:50] This is Cousin Counsel. Why do you have me doing this submission? It's dumb.

Speaker 4:
[51:54] It ain't my fault someone lives a stupid life. This is severely f***ed up. Okay.

Speaker 2:
[51:59] Let the Cousin Counsel begin. Okay, Riley, let's get this started.

Speaker 1:
[52:07] Take it away.

Speaker 2:
[52:08] So my husband and I, we are living with a roommate, that's not weird at all, and we had this creepy basement with a laundry room. One day, we had to swap out the washer, big group effort, all the guys, plus my father-in-law and grandpa, hauling his, hauling this old heavy beast upstairs. Now underneath those stairs was a tiny storage nook, open, like you could see right through the gaps, and not to get too grim, but my grandpa, grandma's ashes were chilling down there in this black box.

Speaker 1:
[52:36] Okay, pause. You couldn't even have put granny on the damn mantle?

Speaker 2:
[52:41] I hadn't figured out what to do with them yet. Yeah, I know, super weird timing. Anyways, as they're lugging the washer up, suddenly a wave of water crashes down into that storage space. My roommate ran up and he was like, hey, don't be mad, but grandma went swimming, and I just lost my mind. Thank goodness she was sealed up in a bag. So no muddy grandma, but still, just imagine telling people like, oh yeah, my grandma took a dip in the basement.

Speaker 1:
[53:07] Okay, pause.

Speaker 2:
[53:07] Well, at least you put granny in a Ziploc bag.

Speaker 1:
[53:10] Granny comes in a Ziploc bag from the funeral home.

Speaker 2:
[53:12] Oh, okay. Yeah.

Speaker 1:
[53:14] Okay, I just do have one question. As many people as it took you to get that dryer up the stairs, did one of you not think, hey, let's make sure there's no water in the dryer?

Speaker 2:
[53:24] Or, hey.

Speaker 1:
[53:24] Washer.

Speaker 2:
[53:25] Yeah. Wait.

Speaker 1:
[53:27] Yeah, washer.

Speaker 2:
[53:28] Or, you know, put all that to the side. If I ever get cremated, which will be never, it better never be me.

Speaker 1:
[53:34] If you cremate my ass, I will play with your toes at night every single night.

Speaker 2:
[53:37] Anyways, I would hope that I was loved enough to be put on the mantle, like you said, and not in the basement.

Speaker 1:
[53:44] What did Granny do? Like, did we like Granny?

Speaker 2:
[53:48] Well, she went skinny dipping. OK, anyways, our opinion on this is just take Granny out of the basement. And I'm glad that Granny was zipped up in a Ziploc baggie and could not get wet.

Speaker 1:
[54:03] Did she like to swim though?

Speaker 2:
[54:05] She could have been a professional swimmer. If she wasn't, she is now. Go ahead.

Speaker 1:
[54:10] OK, I brought my roommate to a family birthday party with me one weekend. We were 19 at the time. Fast forward two or three years and she tells me she's dating someone new and wants to introduce me to her. I hadn't even read this, but I just know it's probably going to be a family member or something. But she was scared because he was older than us. I walked into the restaurant to see her sitting at the table with my uncle. 22 years older than us. They're married now and have two kids of their own. She's younger than his daughter. I don't... Once again, we need Jerry Springer. So Jerry Springer, if Jerry Springer had a son, could that son please take over the show? Because we have a lot of shit to talk about here.

Speaker 2:
[54:51] The gap is not the worst part. Like, whatever, have an age gap, as long as it's not illegal and weird. But the...

Speaker 1:
[54:59] 22 with the roommate's uncle? That's pretty damn weird.

Speaker 2:
[55:03] With the roommate's uncle, that's the weird part. No, anyways, I feel like an age gap is not that big of a deal in my humble opinion.

Speaker 1:
[55:10] No, there are bigger problems on this world than an age gap. But like...

Speaker 2:
[55:14] Scott is like 25 years older than his wife and it's working just fine. They've got two kids.

Speaker 1:
[55:22] In my humble opinion, that's weird.

Speaker 2:
[55:24] I think that's weird.

Speaker 1:
[55:25] I mean, I don't care what you're doing.

Speaker 2:
[55:26] It's not the weirdest thing in the world, but it's... I don't know.

Speaker 1:
[55:30] Could you imagine though, taking your best friend to a family function and then two years later, they are married and have kids?

Speaker 2:
[55:38] No, I couldn't.

Speaker 1:
[55:39] To your uncle?

Speaker 2:
[55:40] No.

Speaker 1:
[55:41] You were a matchmaker. You can add that to your resume.

Speaker 2:
[55:43] Yeah. This is a long one. I started dating this boy and long story short, we broke up. I took it really hard. I literally went silent for a week and only talked to one friend. She was there for everything. My rants, crying and all of it. Well, what a good friend. Here's where it gets messy. Not even a week later, she starts texting him.

Speaker 3:
[56:08] Not a good friend.

Speaker 2:
[56:10] Not a good friend. She kept asking if I was mad and I told her I didn't care as long as she didn't talk about me with him, which looking back was my first mistake because I did care. Well, yeah, should have told the truth. Because I can't tell her who she can talk to, but I feel like betrayal. Yeah, that's breaking the damn code. I was also still trying to process everything at first. Everything was kind of fine, but then he started texting me again. I knew it was going to end badly. It turned into this weird competition and he became all she would talk about. Eventually I told her to stop. She asked why and I said I needed to distance myself from him, but asked her not to tell him because I wanted to handle it myself. I also just wanted her to keep her nose out of it. Yeah, that's when you tell her to mind her own damn business.

Speaker 1:
[56:46] And get her own damn boyfriend.

Speaker 2:
[56:48] Yeah, she went and told him anyway. Now I feel like she might just like the attention, but I honestly don't know. I'd really like an outside opinion. Am I being dramatic? And how should I handle this?

Speaker 5:
[56:57] You should whoop her ass.

Speaker 1:
[57:01] You should tell her that she is faker than a Monopoly $100 bill. And then you should tell her that she broke the code.

Speaker 2:
[57:10] Isn't there like a girl code or something?

Speaker 6:
[57:12] Which one?

Speaker 2:
[57:14] There's many girl codes.

Speaker 1:
[57:15] About dating best friends, exes?

Speaker 6:
[57:17] That just seems like common decency.

Speaker 2:
[57:19] Common decency, yeah.

Speaker 1:
[57:21] Okay, you...

Speaker 2:
[57:22] You're not overreacting. You're not being dramatic.

Speaker 6:
[57:24] She did it.

Speaker 2:
[57:26] It's okay.

Speaker 1:
[57:27] It's okay, Michaela.

Speaker 2:
[57:28] Okay, that's okay. Anyways, we have a couple of people in the audience said that they've done this, so shame on them too. But what do you have? What advice do you have?

Speaker 1:
[57:36] I think you need to come up with a really creative insult because it doesn't hurt people's feelings when you just call them a bitch. So I think you need to call her like a long necked...

Speaker 2:
[57:44] Hippopotamus looking feather ass bitch.

Speaker 1:
[57:47] Organ donor looking ass bitch. That doesn't make sense. Organ donor.

Speaker 2:
[57:52] No.

Speaker 1:
[57:52] You should donate your organs. Save life.

Speaker 2:
[57:54] Yeah.

Speaker 1:
[57:55] Yeah, just come up with some bullshit.

Speaker 2:
[57:56] Yeah. Anyways, that's kind of crazy. Yeah. Anyways, okay, well, case adjourned. Okay, everybody, well.

Speaker 1:
[58:10] All right, everybody, we hope you enjoyed today's Rambling Bullshit Ass episode. We love you, hope you have a great day. Make sure to follow us on all of our social pages and subscribe on YouTube.

Speaker 2:
[58:23] Please subscribe on YouTube. We want a damn trophy, or whatever it's called.

Speaker 1:
[58:26] I want one of them YouTube plaques, so bad I can't see straight. And I can't see straight out of these damn glasses either because Scholar's ass juice is on them. All right, I love y'all.

Speaker 2:
[58:35] Love you, bye. Bye.