transcript
Speaker 1:
[00:00] Picture this. It's late at night, and you're scrolling through your feeds, when all of a sudden you see it, that one product that you've been looking for. You click on the link, add to cart, maybe even shop around a little more before finally hitting checkout. As you're filling in your address, you realize you don't have your cart anywhere near you. That's when you see it. That purple pay button that has all your information saved, making checkout as simple as a simple tap on your screen. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world, and 10% of all e-commerce in the US, from household names like Gymshark to Aviator Nation to brands just getting started. What if people haven't heard of my brand? Shopify helps you find your customers with easy-to-run emails and social media campaigns. Get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you. Easy to create email and social media campaigns wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. Best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert with world-class expertise in everything, from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and beyond. It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com/dailyshow. Go to shopify.com/dailyshow. shopify.com/dailyshow.
Speaker 2:
[01:23] So, you're saying with Hilton Honors, I can use points for a free night's stay anywhere?
Speaker 3:
[01:27] Anywhere.
Speaker 2:
[01:28] What about fancy places like the Canopy in Paris?
Speaker 3:
[01:31] Yeah, Hilton Honors, baby.
Speaker 2:
[01:33] Or relaxing sanctuaries like the Conrad and Tulum?
Speaker 4:
[01:36] Hilton Honors, baby.
Speaker 2:
[01:38] What about the five-star Waldorf Astoria in the Maldives? Are you gonna do this for all 9,000 properties? When you want points that can take you anywhere, anytime, it matters where you stay. Hilton, for the stay. Book your spring break now.
Speaker 5:
[01:54] You're listening to Comedy Central. From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news. This is The Daily Show with your host, Michael Kosta.
Speaker 6:
[02:22] Oh, yeah, we got a big one tonight, baby.
Speaker 7:
[02:24] Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Michael Kosta. We've got so much to talk about tonight. Trump won't pull out of Iran, but he says he's so close. Influencers find a more embarrassing career, and Kash Patel's career might be just like his drinks on the rocks. Oh, and also later, tennis legend Maria Sharapova will be here.
Speaker 5:
[02:42] Oh, my God, I love her.
Speaker 7:
[02:45] Tony Stark, hey, let's get into the headlines. First of all, happy Earth Day, everyone. Make some noise for Earth.
Speaker 8:
[02:58] Yeah, I love Earth. I love Earth.
Speaker 7:
[03:03] Did you remember to get her a gift? I got her some sexy lingerie, and it was more of a gift for me. Let's get started, because as of late, the glaciers are not the only thing that's been melting down. Kash Patel, FBI director and the man voted worst kisser by Breathalyzer magazine is having a bad week. He sued the Atlantic over a story alleging that he drinks too much, misses work, and that he's what's known inside the domestic intelligence community as a total chode. And yesterday, Kash went before the press to make it very clear that he will dodge any question that comes his way.
Speaker 9:
[03:41] Can you say definitively that you have not been intoxicated or absent during your tenure as FBI director?
Speaker 8:
[03:48] I can say unequivocally that I never listen to the fake news mafia.
Speaker 10:
[03:52] Yeah!
Speaker 7:
[03:56] Damn, that's a real master class on talking shit like a middle schooler who's terrible at talking shit. Oh, you f***ed my mom? Well, I sucked your dad's d***, dumbass. Yeah, clap for that. Clap for that. Also, the fake news mafia? I appreciate that you tried to make us sound cool, but if the news were the mafia, it would be a lot more vague. Tonight at 6, let me tell you about the guy who's going down the place to do the thing, okay? Capiche? Come on, Cash Money. You got to give me a better defense than that. Try again.
Speaker 8:
[04:35] This FBI director has been on the job twice as many days as every director before me. What that means is I've taken half as many days off as those before me. What that means is I've taken a third less vacation than those before me.
Speaker 7:
[04:57] Let me just check the math real quick. So we got twice as many days plus half as many over a third less. Yeah, I think he's wasted. But it's like... It just says boobs, I don't know. But it's like my grandpa used to say, if you love your job and you're shit-faced at it, you'll never work a day in your life. Well, let's move on to the big update on the war with Iran. Specifically, the update is that I have no idea what the f*** is going on with the war in Iran. Nobody has had any idea since day one. Trump just started this war on us like a dog bringing us a dead bird. We don't even want this. Now, we have to clean this up? It doesn't help that everything he says about this war is immediately canceled out by the next thing he says about this war. It was only going to be four weeks, then six weeks, then eight to 10 weeks. He wanted an unconditional surrender, then he wanted a nuclear deal, then he wanted to open the street. Please, Mr. President, can you stop bullshitting us and just find an end to this war?
Speaker 11:
[06:08] President Trump just told the New York Post that Vice President JD. Vance and his delegation are in the air on the way to Pakistan for talks with the Iranians.
Speaker 7:
[06:18] Thank you. Yes. We must be nearing peace. I mean, Trump makes up a lot of bullshit, but if he says the Vice President is in the air, that definitely happened.
Speaker 12:
[06:27] But that didn't happen.
Speaker 13:
[06:28] Vice President JD. Vance, who was preparing to fly to Islamabad, never left.
Speaker 7:
[06:33] What? What? So he just made up a flight? Look, I know everyone who knows JD. Vance is always wishing that he was on his way to another continent, but this is not the time to manifest it into being. The ceasefire expires today, unless you're going to extend it.
Speaker 14:
[06:52] The president said it was highly unlikely he would extend the ceasefire.
Speaker 5:
[06:56] I expect to be bombing.
Speaker 7:
[06:58] Shit, okay. So JD. Vance is not on a flight, and Trump is not extending the ceasefire. Okay, I got it.
Speaker 14:
[07:05] Late this afternoon, President Trump announced he was extending the ceasefire indefinitely.
Speaker 7:
[07:11] Indefinitely? Oh, God, so, hold on. No ceasefire to ceasefire, JD. Vance to no JD. Vance, oh, it doesn't, it just says boobs again. You know what?
Speaker 6:
[07:30] Nice boobs.
Speaker 7:
[07:31] But you know what? At least a ceasefire is better than no ceasefire. It means that nobody is getting attacked or shot at. So, phew. Actually, this is a good thing.
Speaker 15:
[07:40] Hours after President Trump's ceasefire extension, Iran attacking vessels in the Strait of Hormuz, more ships fired upon and seized by Iranian forces. Iran unmistakably sending a message to President Trump. Jesus!
Speaker 7:
[07:58] That's the shortest indefinite ceasefire I've ever seen. President Trump, Iran's Navy is shooting at ships.
Speaker 16:
[08:05] Iran's Navy is gone.
Speaker 13:
[08:07] Shut the f*** up!
Speaker 7:
[08:10] Just shut up! God, just shut up! Jesus! Nothing you say means anything! In fact, you know what?
Speaker 15:
[08:19] Hold on.
Speaker 7:
[08:20] I know how to deal with this.
Speaker 16:
[08:22] Never in the history of warfare has an enemy suffered.
Speaker 5:
[08:35] That is so much better.
Speaker 7:
[08:38] Everyone, just enjoy this for a second, this blissful, bullshit-free silence.
Speaker 15:
[08:45] Oh, my God.
Speaker 7:
[08:47] I wish we could just tune him out in real life, but we can't, because even though nothing he says matters, unfortunately, his actions do matter. So we have to pay attention. And right now, his actions, what the f*** are you doing up?
Speaker 8:
[08:59] AAA reports the price of a gallon of regular spiked 40% since the day before the war began.
Speaker 17:
[09:05] Last week, the International Energy Agency warned that Europe has only about six weeks of jet fuel supply left. That supply shock tied to the Strait of Hormuz is hitting fertilizer markets as well.
Speaker 7:
[09:16] Fertilizers going up. Do you understand how bad it is when the price of shit is rising? I wish I knew about this this morning when I flushed a whole retirement account down the toilet. Now, maybe you don't fly or drive or eat, but sooner or later, the effects of this war are going to get you, possibly in ways you never saw coming.
Speaker 3:
[09:46] The war with Iran is having a huge impact on the global condom supply. Condoms are made from petrochemicals, and the supply chain bottleneck in the Strait of Hormuz is forcing the world's top condom producer to raise prices by 20 to 30 percent.
Speaker 15:
[10:01] Well, well, well.
Speaker 7:
[10:04] It looks like that trojan I've had in my wallet since 2002 is finally going to get some action when I sell it on eBay. But a 30 percent spike in condom price is a big deal. I mean, Jerome Powell of the Federal Reserve Bank is already suggesting that people, quote, do more hand stuff. And remember, every day that the Strait of Hormuz remains closed, the global energy crisis only gets worse, which is why today, Earth Day, I just want to give a big shout out to President Trump. Truly. Because thanks to your war, the benefits of switching to renewable energy have never been clearer. Now, we can all see the risks of anchoring the entire global economy to one narrow waterway in the Middle East that stays open or closed based on the impulses of a deranged ruler. No, not that one. There you go. Yeah. Do you want to know what the world would be like right now if we weren't held hostage by fossil fuels? Here's a little taste. Hey, did you hear the Strait of Hormuz is closed? The Strait of Hormuz, isn't that the waterway that has no effect on my life? Yep, that's the one, see you later. So President Trump, thank you. Your thoughtless war is already spuring countries around the world to invest more in wind, solar, and all the other forms of energy that you would probably refer to as gay. Now, I don't think that was your plan when you started this war, because I'm pretty sure you didn't have a plan at all, but still, you have by pure chance helped the Earth. At this point, you're basically Captain Planet. Except if there are any records of you spending time with younger women, they've probably been redacted by the DOJ. And look, we know by now that praise means nothing to you unless it's accompanied by a trophy. So allow me to present to you, Donald Trump, with the first ever Earth Day Award for being a reckless idiot who accidentally did something good. All right, when we come back, we're going to get an update on the midterms. Don't go away.
Speaker 6:
[12:29] This episode is brought to you by Beneful. Mornings are when the grind starts. Stretches, immaculate, cardio, crushed it, territory marked. Sorry, geraniums. The dog routine is on point, but it can get a little wolf. That's why I fuel up with high protein, Beneful freshly prepared meals. I'm eating clean with real meat and veggies served fresh from the pantry. Kick boring in the bowl with Beneful freshly prepared meals. Visit purina.com/beneful to shop now.
Speaker 7:
[13:08] Welcome back to The Daily Show. The midterm elections are just a few months away. So to analyze all the campaign stories, we turn to Ronny Chieng, who is in our indecision analysis zone.
Speaker 18:
[13:24] I'm Roy Chieng, and this is the Nala Zone, where we go deep into our midterm coverage of... Sorry, that title is really undermining the tone of this whole thing. Do you mind if we, can we change that graphic? Like, maybe lose the hyphens? Okay, no, no, no, that's worse. Put it back, put it back, put it back. Okay. Anyway, by now, America has gone used to rich, unqualified people from TV and social media running the country. And with the midterms approaching, it's inspired a whole new crop of shitheads to throw their shithats in the ring.
Speaker 12:
[13:59] Mark Teixeira, a Christian, a family man and MLB All-Star.
Speaker 16:
[14:04] I'm Luke O'Bronson, hockey coach, businessman and actor. Yeah, I've been on reality TV. That's drama for show. What's happening in DC is real drama.
Speaker 14:
[14:15] The Hano music star Bobby Pulido is officially launching his bid for Congress.
Speaker 13:
[14:20] Two live crew. Rap legend Uncle Luke said he's running for Florida's 20th Congress. This is the man that gave us the classic Miso Horny.
Speaker 18:
[14:33] Finally, a member of two live crew in Congress. I'll admit I was skeptical until I saw his campaign slogan, Miso Horny, to take on the establishment. Sure, why not? But if Luke Campbell does not make you so horny, there's plenty of other D-list celebrities and influencer freaks to choose from, like NFL sideline reporter Michelle Tafoya.
Speaker 17:
[15:03] I covered the biggest football games in America.
Speaker 18:
[15:18] I'm not sure that's a winning message. When the pressure was on and the stakes were high, I was watching from the sidelines a very safe distance away. But if there's one thing a sideline reporter brings to the table, it's knowing her stats.
Speaker 17:
[15:38] Almost 30 percent of Californians are homeless on any given night. Thirty percent. That is the largest margin by far.
Speaker 18:
[15:48] Thirty percent?
Speaker 17:
[15:49] I think it's 28. So close to 30 percent of their population is homeless on any given night.
Speaker 18:
[15:53] Thirty percent is 12 million Californians. Look, not every strung out looking person you see in LA is homeless, okay? That's just the cast of euphoria. The actual statistic is less than 1 percent of Californians. So to put this in terms, Michelle can understand, here's the snap, the kick is up, and it is wired by 11.8 million people. But in fairness, California has its issues, particularly in Los Angeles, where none of my pilots have been picked up, and wildfires wiped out entire neighborhoods. The city also has a huge deficit, and according to Michelle Tafoya, 20 billion people are homeless. This city needs someone serious who can solve serious problems.
Speaker 17:
[16:55] It is official, former reality TV star Spencer Pratt filed to run for mayor of Los Angeles.
Speaker 18:
[17:01] Or Spencer Pratt. Finally, a candidate who makes white women over 40 go, Oh yeah, that guy, ill. In case you don't remember Spencer from the golden age of basic cable reality TV, here's a quick refresher of his consensus building approach.
Speaker 10:
[17:21] At the end of the day, I can't change. I can't make you un my sister. You can't call the brother sister line and say, Hey, I don't want Stephanie to be my sister anymore. I can't do that. The phone doesn't work.
Speaker 19:
[17:30] You're making me cry right now.
Speaker 10:
[17:32] Stephanie, you're making yourself cry thinking about what you did. What are you crying about, Stephanie? What the are you crying about? That's why you're not in my life, you crazy bitch. Because you come to barbecues and just start crying.
Speaker 18:
[17:48] Wow, it's amazing how 20 years ago, this was considered TV villain behavior. But now this guy sounds like he should be director of the FBI. But still, I'm sure... Yay, FBI. I'm sure Spencer Pratt has grown up a lot since then. I mean, he's got a degree, he's had kids, he's become an activist after the LA fires. I mean, I'm sure his family is proud of him.
Speaker 11:
[18:15] Actress Stephanie Pratt slams her brother Spencer Pratt over his run for Los Angeles mayor. Stephanie took to X Saturday writing that a vote for Spencer is a vote for stupidity.
Speaker 18:
[18:29] You know, you make someone cry at your barbecue one time and they just throw your whole campaign under the bus. But if you want your candidate less surfer dude and more alpha male, then I've got a race down in Florida for you.
Speaker 20:
[18:44] Dan Bilzerian has filed paperwork to challenge incumbent Republican Randy Fine for Florida's sixth congressional district in the 2026 election.
Speaker 18:
[18:54] Yes, Dan Bilzerian, the shirtless trust fund Manosphere influencer who posts pictures like this and videos like this. Oh, hell yeah. Check out that. He's crushing a car with a tank. I would never would have thought of doing that, all right. This is sick. This is sick. I bet this campaign is going to be fun as hell.
Speaker 21:
[19:16] I'm just going to come out and say it. I think that Jews are causing a disproportionate amount of problems in the United States.
Speaker 18:
[19:23] Ah, damn it. Why are you showing me Nazism when I was expecting only sexism? But don't worry, he's being forced to answer for his anti-Semitism by America's last remaining journalistic institution, TMZ.
Speaker 20:
[19:41] Are you anti-Semitic?
Speaker 21:
[19:43] No, I'm not anti-Semitic. I think that, you know, that's kind of a made up term.
Speaker 20:
[19:48] You called your opponent this fat Jew. So he's not from Israel, but you called a guy in Florida this fat Jew. How is that not anti-Semitic?
Speaker 21:
[19:59] Well, he's a Jewish supremacist. He literally talks about how Muslims are lower than dogs. So is that Islamophobic?
Speaker 10:
[20:07] Yes.
Speaker 20:
[20:07] Yes.
Speaker 10:
[20:08] Yes, it is.
Speaker 18:
[20:16] I've heard enough. Give TMZ the Pulitzer. Thank you. Yeah, thank you TMZ for having the guts to stand up to an anti-Semite who gets his hair cut at a dog groomer. I understand we're gonna have to tolerate idiots running for office, but can they at least be fun idiots like this one?
Speaker 3:
[20:41] Reality star Farrah Abraham, Teen Mom star announced she was running for mayor in Austin, Texas.
Speaker 22:
[20:47] But the problem is, that race is not until 2028, and it's a fact she seemed to learn in real time on live television.
Speaker 20:
[20:53] The election is not until 2028. Why so early?
Speaker 4:
[20:58] Oh, for some reason, the mayor election is 2026. I don't know, that's just what the office told me.
Speaker 20:
[21:05] So it is 2028. So I think you may have jumped the gun here.
Speaker 4:
[21:10] I love that I jumped the gun.
Speaker 18:
[21:18] You expect me to believe a team mom made a mistake, okay? So what? She filed to run for office two years early. That just shows you how badly she wants to be the mayor. It was the office she was born to run for.
Speaker 22:
[21:35] Abraham, she's now running for city council instead. That election is this year.
Speaker 18:
[21:40] Okay, you know what? At least she's willing to admit when she's wrong and adapt. I'm excited to vote for her. I don't know when, I don't know where. I don't know for what, but I do know she has my vote. That's all for tonight. I'll see you next time in The Analizote.
Speaker 9:
[22:02] Thank you, Ronny. We'll come back.
Speaker 4:
[22:03] Maria Sharapova will join me in the show.
Speaker 18:
[22:04] Don't go away.
Speaker 21:
[22:05] Ronny Chieng.
Speaker 9:
[22:12] K-pop demon hunters Saja Boyz Breakfast Meal and Huntrix Meal have just dropped at McDonald's. They're calling this a battle for the fans. What do you say to that, Rumi?
Speaker 10:
[22:21] It's not a battle.
Speaker 2:
[22:22] So glad the Saja Boyz could take breakfast and give our meal the rest of the day.
Speaker 15:
[22:26] It is an honor to share.
Speaker 23:
[22:28] No, it's our honor.
Speaker 12:
[22:30] It is our larger honor.
Speaker 10:
[22:31] No, really, stop.
Speaker 9:
[22:33] You can really feel the respect in this battle. Pick a meal to pick a side.
Speaker 4:
[22:40] I participate in McDonald's while supplies last.
Speaker 19:
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Speaker 18:
[23:46] Welcome back to The Daily Show.
Speaker 7:
[23:47] My guest tonight is a five-time Grand Slam tennis champion, investor, best-selling author, and host of the new Vox Media podcast, Pretty Tough. Please welcome Maria Sharapova. Five-time Grand Slam Champion between us. I know, is that a great crowd?
Speaker 24:
[24:25] Fantastic crowd. It's been a minute since I've seen a crowd like this.
Speaker 7:
[24:28] They're hot. They knew that between us, we would have five Grand Slam Championships.
Speaker 24:
[24:37] Good joke.
Speaker 7:
[24:38] So...
Speaker 24:
[24:38] You got jokes.
Speaker 7:
[24:39] I got jokes. I got jokes. Those are my Grand Slam match wins. Grand Slam Champion, former World Number One, Olympic Medalist, best-selling author, podcast?
Speaker 24:
[24:51] I know, right?
Speaker 7:
[24:52] That was the one thing missing from your resume?
Speaker 24:
[24:54] Apparently, that's the evolution.
Speaker 7:
[24:56] Pretty Tough. Like, I don't think of you as pretty tough. I watched you compete for so many years, and it was 100% tough. It was all-out tough. Tell me a little bit about this Pretty Tough. I think I have an idea of what it's about, but...
Speaker 24:
[25:07] Pretty Tough was very much my mentality from my youth. Like, I pumped my fist from the very beginning, and I did not apologize for it. I got slack for it, right? It was, like, the only thing I was known for. But yeah, but since I've retired, it's been a few years, and I had a kid, and I'm like, all of those lessons still apply, and you still have to, you know, fight for what you believe and work hard and be determined, and all the elements of being Pretty Tough.
Speaker 7:
[25:31] Where does... You know, from the age of five, you were training to be a world champion. The competitiveness in your eyes and your body are so evident from watching you. Where is that competitive energy now? Because you don't have the outlet of the tennis court.
Speaker 24:
[25:53] It's so funny when you say that, because I have a three-and-a-half-year-old, he's almost four, and I'm like, there is no competitive energy anywhere.
Speaker 7:
[26:01] Right.
Speaker 24:
[26:01] Like, there's energy, not competitive. So I look back to those days, and look, we moved to this country, I was just six years old, and we had a vision and a dream, and I loved what I did. I loved being an athlete, I loved being a competitor, such a huge identity of mine. But as a female athlete, the time will come, much sooner than if you were a CEO or an entrepreneur. And so I started kind of building those small steps toward my future and in business and entrepreneurship, and now in the podcast space.
Speaker 7:
[26:34] What do you want to achieve with the pod? Because you host it, you have female guests on, I mean, ambitious, successful. Your first guest was Zoe Zaldana.
Speaker 9:
[26:44] Yes, today, today.
Speaker 24:
[26:45] Today, today.
Speaker 7:
[26:46] Today, it's amazing. I listen to it. It's fun to hear two legends talking about such different fields in their lives. What are you trying to achieve with it?
Speaker 24:
[26:55] Well, it's the juxtaposition of being that gritty leading a team, but also being elegant and being vulnerable and being soft and being motherly, and those two can co-exist at the same time. I often had to choose one or the other by the press and by the media and by occasionally friends and family, but especially now with being a mother and like having friends that have children, we also face similar, you know, I felt like they could really relate to the concept and the subject, and it felt like a very natural evolution.
Speaker 7:
[27:25] Not to mention, every podcast is a guy.
Speaker 24:
[27:27] Oh, I like that you can swear here.
Speaker 7:
[27:28] You can swear here. We do this shit. Yeah. Okay. When I swear here, nobody in a chair goes, code violation, Mr. Kosta.
Speaker 24:
[27:40] That's fantastic. One of my first meetings with Vox Media, I was like, I'm only doing the podcast if I can swear.
Speaker 7:
[27:45] Okay, great.
Speaker 24:
[27:45] Like, I cannot get through an hour interview without saying f***.
Speaker 7:
[27:50] Did you get code violations as a player? I don't remember a lot of that.
Speaker 24:
[27:53] No, I was pretty put together. Yeah, it's all gone downhill since.
Speaker 7:
[27:57] So, that's okay.
Speaker 24:
[27:59] Yeah, I kept it together pretty good. On the outside. On the inside.
Speaker 7:
[28:05] So much of podcasting is male driven.
Speaker 24:
[28:08] Yes.
Speaker 7:
[28:09] The manosphere and hosted by a man.
Speaker 24:
[28:10] The manosphere, I've been hearing that a lot.
Speaker 7:
[28:12] You've been hearing that. Is your competitive person, is your intention to take on the manosphere or is it just to showcase more female driven properties?
Speaker 24:
[28:20] Oh, I think a lot of men have great content. I listen to it a lot and there are a few. I love how you just gave yourself a compliment. But equally, there's so much room for growth for females to host podcasts. I mean, Kara Swisher, Mel Robbins, those were all my inspirations leading into this. So I feel like there's room in the sandbox.
Speaker 7:
[28:40] Yeah, there is. In researching you and getting a chance to talk with you, I don't get to talk with a lot of Grand Slam champions. It's awesome you're here. Thank you for taking the time to talk with me. But I had forgotten that you had played five Grand Slam Finals. You did not win.
Speaker 24:
[28:56] Thank you for reminding me.
Speaker 7:
[28:58] But it is just so impossible to even make a finals period. And you always talk about...
Speaker 24:
[29:03] It's so disappointing when you lose in the final. It's actually tougher to lose in the final than it is to lose in the semis.
Speaker 7:
[29:09] Why?
Speaker 24:
[29:10] Because you get to watch the other player receive the winner's trophy. I don't know what other sport you really do that where you're standing right next to them and they're like, and the champion is not you.
Speaker 7:
[29:21] It is truly remarkable that in tennis you battle, battle, battle, and you have to stand there and go, it's such a pleasure to play you. I wanted to just, I don't want to, you know, you talk so much about learning from losses or failing forward. I have a list here of the Grand Slams you did not win. And I'm sorry that I have to bring this up. But I'm wondering...
Speaker 24:
[29:40] Why did I come here?
Speaker 7:
[29:41] I don't know, because...
Speaker 24:
[29:43] Okay, start, just start.
Speaker 7:
[29:44] 2007, Australian Open, final, you lose to Serena Williams. What do you remember about that match? What did you take from that match?
Speaker 24:
[29:52] Nothing.
Speaker 7:
[29:52] Really? Next. Well, let me preface by saying this. You beat Serena for your first Grand Slam when you were 17 years old at Wimbledon. She's the defending champion, she's world number one. You come on the stage and you beat Serena Williams. From what I know about Serena, she was waiting to take some revenge.
Speaker 24:
[30:13] Well, that's a sign of a champion.
Speaker 7:
[30:15] A sign of a champion. Okay. So that one you didn't learn anything from. What about 2011 Wimbledon final, you lost to Petra Kvitova.
Speaker 24:
[30:22] It's hard losing at Wimbledon, whether it's first round or the finals. But the reason I say you learn so much from losing is because I think that's when you do your best work. That is when you get back to the drawing board, you huddle with your team, you analyze, you think of a new plan. When you're winning, you're confident and things just flow, they just go according to plan and you don't think about, oh, well, what can I do better? So I think you're growing when you're actually not at your best.
Speaker 7:
[30:48] I love that.
Speaker 24:
[30:50] Can you relate?
Speaker 7:
[30:51] I can relate. I have kids and a wife. I'm fully aware of when I'm failing. That's hard. What about the 2007 year end in Madrid with Justine Hennan? What was that match all about? Tell me why.
Speaker 24:
[31:12] It was a heartbreaker because I had so many, this is against Justine Hennan, who was the fiercest competitor against me. Like her game, her on a good day and me on a good day, it was just, it was a better day for her. Yeah. Three hours long, three plus, and I ended up losing. It was back and forth, back and forth. And this is like season and championships, not a major, but a big deal. You want to end the year on a good note. And it's sometimes tougher to lose a third set than it is to like just lose in straight sets. And I come off the court and they're just celebrating with the team and they have champagne and it's just, and my dad was my coach at the time and he looks at me and he's like, we're going to get our revenge. And I went to the off season, I didn't take a vacation, which I had planned, my friends were all disappointed. And I said, I'm going back to the drawing board, back to the drawing board. And I worked hard. I came into the Australian Open just two months later. I draw her in the quarterfinal. I'm like terrible draw. And I beat her in two sets. And I always think of that match because I became a better player because of it.
Speaker 7:
[32:08] I love that. That's amazing. We're seeing a trend with athletes prioritizing their mental health. I mean, the WTA travels with a therapist now. I don't think that was available to you in your time. I feel like... What's your take on athletes prioritizing their mental health? In some ways, that might be seen as a weakness when you were playing.
Speaker 24:
[32:37] Oh, no, no, it's not. I think accepting the fact that you can... Well, first of all, it's a very expensive sport, so you have to get to a position where you can afford a team with a coach and a fitness trainer and a physio and all that and perhaps a mental coach. I usually had a small team because I just felt less pressure. I didn't have to report to that many people. But the teams are growing. Now, like the boxes of 10 people, that's not enough anymore. You have a full entourage. It's overflowing. I don't think it's a weakness. I think acknowledging that you want to grow, if it's mentally, if it's physically, you always want to improve.
Speaker 7:
[33:14] Were you focused on your mental toughness? Were you working on that or is that something that was innate and you had worked on forehands, backhands and step?
Speaker 24:
[33:21] Yeah, I would sometimes get off the court and say, I was a little soft today. Like I wanted my opponent to make a mistake. I didn't go for the winner. I'd say that. Because I wanted to like, if I lost, I wanted to lose in my own terms.
Speaker 7:
[33:34] Love that. Well, you did. You played like that and you're so much fun to watch. I'm going to flip the script here. At the end of your podcast, you asked your guests pretty tough questions. Well, I'm going to ask you your pretty tough questions because you interview women of high achieving and high status. Well, you should be interviewing you. Are you ready for pretty tough questions that you created?
Speaker 24:
[33:54] Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 4:
[33:57] Maria Sharapova.
Speaker 7:
[34:00] Most common misconception about you.
Speaker 24:
[34:02] Oh, that I'm a cold bitch. Hi. What do we think?
Speaker 22:
[34:08] What do we think is great?
Speaker 7:
[34:11] What's your relationship to perfection?
Speaker 24:
[34:14] Oh, you want to be perfect. Believe me, I strive for perfection on the court. But I realize that it's impossible. First of all, you lose a lot more than you win. And that's just a fact. And you just got to go with it.
Speaker 7:
[34:26] Well, you won like 81% of your matches. So you didn't lose more. Someone like me lost more than I won, for sure.
Speaker 24:
[34:32] Thank you for knowing that, Scott. My posture is a lot better after hearing that.
Speaker 7:
[34:37] This was not your Pretty Tough question. This is mine. Let's be real.
Speaker 11:
[34:40] A curveball?
Speaker 7:
[34:41] A curveball, yes. Let's be real. How bullshit is pickleball?
Speaker 24:
[34:54] I like where you're headed.
Speaker 7:
[34:55] Yeah.
Speaker 24:
[34:56] Have you played it? Oh, yeah. Yeah, on national television.
Speaker 7:
[34:59] Oh, okay.
Speaker 24:
[35:00] It didn't go well.
Speaker 7:
[35:01] Didn't go well?
Speaker 24:
[35:01] No, I played with Johnny Mac.
Speaker 7:
[35:03] Okay.
Speaker 24:
[35:03] And he, well, it ended, he didn't even say goodbye to me.
Speaker 7:
[35:07] Oh, yeah. Well, that's on brand for him.
Speaker 24:
[35:08] Yeah, we lost, clearly. We played doubles, and he was on my team. I haven't played since.
Speaker 7:
[35:16] I always tell people, I had a good relationship with my parents, so I don't have to play pickleball. Maria, I don't get to talk to a Grand Slam champion very often. Tennis to tennis, people who are watching, who play the sport at all different levels. What's one piece of advice you could give a tennis player on a way to improve their game? Anything at all?
Speaker 24:
[35:34] Their game.
Speaker 7:
[35:35] Or just their approach, their game, their anything.
Speaker 24:
[35:39] Don't miss.
Speaker 7:
[35:40] Don't miss. I love that.
Speaker 24:
[35:43] Do not miss.
Speaker 7:
[35:44] We make it too complicated sometimes.
Speaker 24:
[35:45] Yeah, you overthink it. Just let it go.
Speaker 7:
[35:47] Just don't miss.
Speaker 24:
[35:48] Let it go. Trust your instinct. Just do it.
Speaker 7:
[35:51] Thank you for being here and talking with us.
Speaker 24:
[35:52] New episodes of the podcast, Pretty Tough and Maria Sharapova.
Speaker 7:
[35:55] Coming up each Wednesday, Maria Sharapova. Okay, quick break. We'll be right back after this. Thank you.
Speaker 5:
[36:01] Thank you very much, Maria.
Speaker 25:
[36:05] Tomorrow morning is knocking. Stock your fridge now.
Speaker 2:
[36:08] How about a creamy mocha frappuccino drink?
Speaker 18:
[36:10] Or a sweet vanilla?
Speaker 2:
[36:11] Smooth caramel maybe?
Speaker 25:
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Speaker 7:
[36:52] That's the show for tonight. Now here it is, your moment of zen.
Speaker 11:
[36:55] No one knows who's calling the shots. Vance, Witkoff and Kushner were supposed to leave for Islamabad, but they never took off. Because the Iranian delegation never took off, which is suspicious because this morning, Trump said the gay Ayatollah authorized the deal.
Speaker 5:
[37:12] Explore more shows from the Daily Show Podcast Universe by searching The Daily Show wherever you get your podcasts. Watch The Daily Show, weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central Podcast.
Speaker 16:
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