transcript

Speaker 1:
[00:02] This is a Headgum Podcast.

Speaker 2:
[00:06] Hacks is back for its fifth and final season, and so is the Hacks Podcast. Join the Hacks creators and showrunners, Lucia and Yellow, Paul W. Downs, and Jen Statsky, as they unpack the Emmy-winning comedy series. On each episode, hear stories from the set, what goes on in the writer's room, and how these beloved characters close out their final season.

Speaker 3:
[00:27] Watch Hacks, streaming exclusively on HBO Max, and listen to the Hacks podcast on HBO Max, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 4:
[00:41] This is Emily, Henley, and Sammy, and you're listening to Too Scary Didn't Watch.

Speaker 5:
[00:55] Hi, everyone, welcome to Too Scary Didn't Watch, the horror movie recap podcast for those too scared to watch for themselves. I'm Emily, and I am too scared to watch scary movies.

Speaker 4:
[01:04] I'm Sammy, and I love watching scary movies, and so I watch them so that you don't have to, and we are missing Henley this week, as you will have noticed.

Speaker 5:
[01:14] You've definitely noticed. She's sick, you guys, I hate to report it. We gotta get this woman well.

Speaker 4:
[01:22] You think it's hand, foot and mouth again? Hand, foot and mouth makes me laugh so much. I mean, it sounds absolutely horrible, but doesn't it sound so like-

Speaker 5:
[01:30] It's so funny that there's not another name. Come up with, give it a name. I mean, I know it has a name, but-

Speaker 4:
[01:36] It's a bad, that's a bad name.

Speaker 5:
[01:38] It's a bad name. At least call it like HFM or something. Let's make it something, don't make us always have to say- Hand, foot and mouth disease. Hand, foot and mouth disease stuff, you guys. And they keep having it.

Speaker 4:
[01:54] They keep having it. I mean, most people I know that have kids have had a hand, foot and mouth disease at least once or twice. I didn't even know it was a thing until our friends started having children.

Speaker 5:
[02:08] Yeah, turns out it's a big thing.

Speaker 4:
[02:09] You learn so much.

Speaker 5:
[02:12] This is why it's important to talk to people and to live in community, so that we know we're not alone.

Speaker 4:
[02:22] Exactly.

Speaker 5:
[02:23] When we find ourselves with hand, foot and mouth disease, we know that others have had it. Please send her all of your healing spells. We miss her and I'm glad she's resting. The woman needs to rest.

Speaker 4:
[02:40] Me too. Me too. I'm also glad and me too. I also need rest.

Speaker 5:
[02:45] I know and me too.

Speaker 4:
[02:46] I also need rest.

Speaker 5:
[02:47] We all need, everybody also needs to rest.

Speaker 4:
[02:49] It's true.

Speaker 5:
[02:51] Guys, get some rest. We will soldier on as we must. And my dear friend, Sammy, did anything scary happen to you this week?

Speaker 4:
[03:01] Well, Emily, I paid my taxes. I paid them in full. And moments later, Duncan got off the phone with our shared accountant or tax accountant and asked her about the like specific, or like what would actually happen if he doesn't pay taxes. Cause he's like, you know, I'm like thinking about a tax strike. I don't like where our tax money is going in America. And I'd like to withhold taxes in protest. And she was like, yeah, lots of my clients are doing that. Totally great. I totally support it. Like, I was like, bitch, I just paid my taxes.

Speaker 6:
[03:51] Why didn't you say that?

Speaker 5:
[03:53] I just paid my taxes.

Speaker 4:
[03:56] Um, obviously, you know, there's risks involved. This isn't advice to our listeners, but she kind of made it seem like the risks weren't as crazy as I had heard. Like, I don't think anyone has been actually put in jail for not paying taxes on, like, a civilian level in quite some time. I think it has happened, but it's, like, just a handful of times.

Speaker 5:
[04:29] Like, I just would imagine, too, you'd probably have to have, like, never paid taxes for them to be like, okay, well, we're going to arrest you now.

Speaker 4:
[04:36] Yeah. So the main thing is that just, like, accrues fees, and, like, you probably will have to pay them eventually. I think that's Duncan's thinking, is, like, just not paying for...

Speaker 5:
[04:46] Pay them at a time when you like what they're going towards more, perhaps?

Speaker 7:
[04:50] Or at least, like, hoping, optimism?

Speaker 4:
[04:52] At least, like, holding out as long as you... as long as you can, I guess. But, um... But, yeah, I paid mine like a total friggin doofus.

Speaker 5:
[05:05] I get this. I feel the same way. I was like, thank god I got... What a load off. Then I was like, wait, what the fuck did I just do? So...

Speaker 4:
[05:14] Yeah, it's pretty upsetting where those dollars are going.

Speaker 5:
[05:18] Incredibly upsetting.

Speaker 4:
[05:19] And... But I was like, again, as soon as I paid them, I started seeing all these articles, the algorithm learned, like, that that's what I was thinking about. And so it was like, here's like, this is one of the biggest tax resistance years in modern history. And I was like, again, annoyed that I didn't...

Speaker 5:
[05:38] Cross that picket line.

Speaker 4:
[05:42] But also felt like proud and optimistic that other people are doing it. I don't know that we'll get hard data on that.

Speaker 5:
[05:50] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[05:52] But yeah, I think it's time for us to be doing that, I think.

Speaker 5:
[05:58] Definitely. Not us, me and Sammy. Because we didn't.

Speaker 2:
[06:02] But I really...

Speaker 5:
[06:03] That is on us and that's egg on our face for sure.

Speaker 4:
[06:10] That's it for me. Emily, what about you?

Speaker 8:
[06:14] Did anything scary happen to you this week?

Speaker 5:
[06:18] Yeah, I really hemmed and hawed about, am I going to talk about it? But then I thought, you know, what is the only thing on my mind? And also, you know, people have also experienced this and it's probably helpful to feel again, not alone. Trigger warning for pet death. We had to put Birdie down this week, which was the hardest and worst thing I've ever had to do. It was really surreal. I have had pets growing up. Both my dogs growing up, we put to sleep, but I was a child and not in charge. Yes. And it was very sad, but it is, sorry to anybody who has not yet experienced this and will. It's a thing, anybody who has pets will all experience a version of this, and we know it, and we know that it's the case. This is my first time experiencing it in this way. And it's one of those things that you think will be really, really bad, and it is so much worse. It's so much worse than I imagined it would be. So much harder, and so much... So many more layers to it than I was expecting. But it was the right thing to do for her, and I'm ultimately incredibly grateful that we were able to give her a very peaceful end. I unintentionally already told you the same, but I unintentionally quoted Dr. Kelson to Joel in talking about it, because we found out Bertie had lymphoma, she had end stage lymphoma, which an important note is that that does not show up on Bloodwork, so the only way to find that out is to do an ultrasound, which is what we did. But that was going to kill her, but we couldn't do anything about that. That was going to kill Bertie, and Bertie was going to die, and that was just an inevitability, as it is for all of us. But not all deaths are equal, and we got to choose a really nice death for her. There's something really beautiful about that. I also learned you can have people come to your house and do it.

Speaker 4:
[09:04] I was going to ask if that was what.

Speaker 5:
[09:07] That's what we did.

Speaker 4:
[09:10] That's so much better because most pets are so scared at the vet, and it just feels like a-

Speaker 5:
[09:17] Yeah. We didn't want those to be some of her last moments. Yeah, exactly. So, God bless the people who do their job. We had a wonderful woman, Dr. Angie, came to our home and was like, as he would be, just the kindest, most wonderful person. And it was so hard and it was so sad. And yeah, I just, I love my pets. I knew it would be really brutal, but I didn't understand just exactly how hard it is. And so for people I know who've gone through it or anyone listening who has gone through it, I really, my heart just really goes out to you. It's a really specific kind of grief and it's really, it's so difficult to choose to end the life of something that you love so much, or even if you didn't make the choice, but just like to lose that. And like, you know, I also realized that in addition to like, we just really miss Bird. She was, I just really miss Bird. And I, we have other cats who honestly are not fucking doing it for me right now, because they're not birdy. And I'm like, you're not giving me what I want. I love them, but it's a complicated thing. But we're not just mourning Birdy. Like we're mourning the end of a chapter of our lives, which really hit me this week of just that, that, that was like a version of our family that doesn't exist anymore. Yeah. Which is another just really wild thing. Like, like so much of our identity was like, this is our home and these are our cats. We have four cats and this is our life. And like, it was so, it, everything was in like such a perfect balance. And it's different now. And it was also my birthday this week. But it really, like, I don't know, I'm just, like, really feeling the reality of, like, just what it is to be alive, and that things are going to change and there's nothing we can do. And we just have to just keep going and we'll find something new in a new, I don't know. It's just like, it's a lot of feelings. I've had been having a lot of feelings this week.

Speaker 4:
[11:53] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[11:58] I just miss my bird. She was really great.

Speaker 4:
[12:03] She was a really, really great cat. Our sweet B-Roy.

Speaker 5:
[12:07] B-Roy, as you may know.

Speaker 6:
[12:08] B-Roy, as you may know.

Speaker 5:
[12:12] Of her. God, she was funny.

Speaker 4:
[12:13] She was really funny.

Speaker 5:
[12:14] I don't think any living thing has ever made me laugh as hard as Bernie.

Speaker 4:
[12:17] She had like one tooth.

Speaker 5:
[12:18] Oh my gosh, she was so perfect. And, you know, the thing about pets is that we don't create them. We just offer our homes to them. And Bernie happened to be existing on this planet at the same time as us. And we got to be the ones who gave her a home. And that is just the most incredible thing. So I do it. I do it again and again. And I will be doing this again and again for the rest of my life, because I will always have pets in my life. And what a wild thing we just sign ourselves up for.

Speaker 4:
[12:53] Yeah. Yeah, it's really, really intense. I mean, we love them so much. And when you love something so much, it just creates a space for a lot of pain and grief when that person or pet leaves this mortal plane.

Speaker 5:
[13:13] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[13:16] But the love makes it worth it.

Speaker 5:
[13:18] The love makes it worth it. It is and it is and it's yeah, you can't. You have to feel all the things to feel any of the things. And unfortunately, that is just how just how it is. And it's worth it. And people have really been so lovely and like really, I've been getting so surprised by the places where I'm like finding support and nice messages like I had to fucking adjust my pet sitting account, which was so hard. And they like immediately sent us an email with this huge like it was so I people I don't know like it just but it was so moving and they obviously are pet people and they really understand. And it's just like so that's another thing too is it's just it's you know, everyone understands grief to some degree and it's like a really beautiful thing to find comfort in and provide comfort to other people. So, yeah, that's what's going on with me.

Speaker 4:
[14:33] Yeah, that's a pretty scary week.

Speaker 6:
[14:37] That's a pretty intense week.

Speaker 4:
[14:40] And I love you so much and I'm so sorry.

Speaker 5:
[14:43] I love you so much.

Speaker 4:
[14:46] You went through so much this week, but yeah, Birdie was very lucky to have you guys as her home and we're all gonna miss her. Anyone that knew her loved her.

Speaker 5:
[14:58] Anyone that knew her, it's very true. I'll share some photos of Birdie. She was very beautiful and very fat at one point in her life and very funny looking and very stupid and very sweet.

Speaker 9:
[15:13] One little brain cell bouncing around in there.

Speaker 5:
[15:15] She just had nothing in there but goodness, just absolutely nothing.

Speaker 4:
[15:20] The purest little heart and the emptiest skull.

Speaker 5:
[15:23] Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, nothing. Oh, there will never be another absolutely singular, absolutely singular. But you know what? I don't think I've ever felt more alive in my life. There is something about feeling all the feelings where I'm like, holy shit, I am alive. I am alive. I am here.

Speaker 4:
[15:47] Human experience, you are experiencing it. Holy shit.

Speaker 5:
[15:50] I am not numb. I am here.

Speaker 4:
[15:52] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[15:55] So, what are you going to do? You know, you just got to, we got to be alive. We got to live.

Speaker 4:
[16:01] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[16:03] We simply have to live. We simply must. And I'm so sorry that there's just no good way to transition out of that into telling me about whatever we're going to talk about this week. But I am excited to be here with you and to be talking about something that's really crazy, I bet.

Speaker 4:
[16:23] Yes, it is crazy. But this is, as I promised you, my version of a softball. We did talk about staying away from anything. Too emotionally intense. So this week, thank you, we are talking about Resident Evil, the 2002 version.

Speaker 5:
[16:46] Holy crap, 2002. Wowee. And now this was a video game first. Yes. And then these movies.

Speaker 4:
[16:55] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[16:56] And you said 2002 version.

Speaker 4:
[16:59] I think there's just a lot of movies in this series.

Speaker 5:
[17:05] Oh, got it, got it.

Speaker 4:
[17:05] I guess I phrased that in a way, like there were other remakes, which I don't think that there are.

Speaker 5:
[17:09] But there's going to be one.

Speaker 4:
[17:11] Yes. And that's why I was kind of interested. I've had this movie on my list because I had never seen it before this. But Zack Craigger is directing a Resident Evil movie that comes out in September that I'm very excited for.

Speaker 5:
[17:28] Yeah. Holy heck.

Speaker 4:
[17:28] And some people have-

Speaker 5:
[17:30] Starring Austin?

Speaker 4:
[17:33] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[17:35] He was in Weapons.

Speaker 8:
[17:36] He's really good. Abrams.

Speaker 5:
[17:37] I was going to say that, but I was like, there's certainly no way that's right, but I guess there was.

Speaker 4:
[17:42] Yeah. And it has Callie Reese in it, who is in the latest season of True Detective, who I just really loved. So I'm excited about that too. And I guess some people have seen some early screenings. Apparently, it's 90 minutes long. Love that. So is this one.

Speaker 9:
[17:55] Love that.

Speaker 5:
[17:55] Thank you for what you're doing for horror movies. All I know about, I've never seen these movies, obviously, but I have vivid memories of my middle school friend's older brother playing this video game with his friends at sleepover, when I'd be like sleeping over at their house and in the dark, like it'd be pitch dark and they'd be playing Resident Evil, and it was so fucking scary.

Speaker 9:
[18:20] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[18:21] Like so scary.

Speaker 4:
[18:22] Yeah, I don't fuck with, well, I don't really fuck with video games in general, but a scary video game is scarier than a scary movie to me.

Speaker 5:
[18:33] Yeah, because you're in it.

Speaker 4:
[18:34] Because you're the main character.

Speaker 5:
[18:35] It's happening to you.

Speaker 4:
[18:35] It's real. It's real. I actually don't really have a lot of memories of this movie because I feel like it came out at the same, around the same time as like Underworld and Silent Hill, which we've also covered. And so I think in my brain, they've all kind of just blended into one.

Speaker 5:
[18:56] Like this is zombies?

Speaker 4:
[18:59] Yes. I didn't even know that. I was expecting like in Vampires. Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[19:04] Right.

Speaker 6:
[19:05] Which, but that's Underworld.

Speaker 4:
[19:07] Took me about 15 minutes into the movie to realize that this is not Underworld.

Speaker 5:
[19:12] Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 4:
[19:13] I wasn't mad about it.

Speaker 5:
[19:14] We should probably do Underworld.

Speaker 4:
[19:15] Yeah. I'm curious about Underworld too. Kate Beckinsale?

Speaker 5:
[19:18] Michael Sheen?

Speaker 6:
[19:20] Right? Oh.

Speaker 4:
[19:22] Did they meet on that?

Speaker 5:
[19:23] Did I make that up too? I might have. I think that's, but I do think that they met on that because I think he does. I think he's plays a vampire like a lot.

Speaker 4:
[19:31] Yeah. Yeah. He's in it.

Speaker 5:
[19:33] Nice. Wow. I know so many things.

Speaker 4:
[19:35] You know so many things.

Speaker 5:
[19:36] Can you even believe? Because I surely can't.

Speaker 4:
[19:40] It's like when a song comes on from that you haven't heard in 20 years.

Speaker 5:
[19:45] You know all the words.

Speaker 4:
[19:45] It's like, oh, here's all the words in my brain. When I can't think of anything that I want to think, recall anything to memory in a normal human conversation, and then put on some song that I haven't heard in decades, and there's my brain kicking into first gear. But okay, Resident Evil was written and directed by Paul WS. Anderson, our old pal. He is also the director of Event Horizon and Alien vs. Predator, and lots of other kind of sci-fi horror movies. It is starring Mila Jovovich, Michelle Rodriguez, Eric Mabeus, and James Purfoy. And it's streaming on Prime for just another week or so. I was like, they're going to pull it from Prime because there's a new Resident Evil movie coming out, so they're going to be like, we want to have it be rental because they'll, I think, make more money that way. That's how my brain perceives.

Speaker 5:
[20:54] They're always trying to make the most money.

Speaker 4:
[20:56] So I was happy to see it still streaming in this moment. But if you want to watch it, better be quick about it.

Speaker 5:
[21:03] 2002? Yeah, okay.

Speaker 9:
[21:07] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[21:08] Yeah, what a time.

Speaker 5:
[21:11] I can only picture, well, I mean, you also have her behind you, but when I think of this movie, all I can think of is Mila Jovovich?

Speaker 4:
[21:20] Yes. As a kid, I said Mia Jovovich.

Speaker 9:
[21:25] Yeah, it seems right.

Speaker 4:
[21:26] But I looked it up and it is Mila Jovovich. So I was close.

Speaker 5:
[21:32] Okay.

Speaker 4:
[21:33] But not correct.

Speaker 5:
[21:35] Yeah, I do. Close, but not correct. I just looked up the poster because I want to see. I don't remember Michelle Rodriguez being in anything but Fast and Furious. It's always weird to me when she shows up in another movie because I'm like, but you don't exist in this world. You only exist in that world.

Speaker 4:
[21:57] Exist in the Fast and Furious universe.

Speaker 5:
[21:59] Like that doesn't compute. Yeah, but I do remember it being like all the women were like really hot. Like they like looked hot and cool.

Speaker 4:
[22:09] Yeah, she was apparently in a movie called Girl Fight, which I haven't seen but did ring a bell and that was before this. So she was like coming off like she was like the hot, hot new thing in town. And I think Fast and Furious was like at the same time as this.

Speaker 5:
[22:29] Wow. And so then since then she hasn't been in anything else.

Speaker 4:
[22:32] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[22:33] Okay, great.

Speaker 4:
[22:35] Because she's freaking probably so rich.

Speaker 5:
[22:39] Yeah. Oh my God. And there's just simply so many movies. They've been making a movie since whenever they came out to until now and beyond.

Speaker 4:
[22:49] Oh, I guess Fast and Furious came out before this too. It was in 2001.

Speaker 5:
[22:52] So, okay. But yeah, she was probably filming them around the same time. She's an avatar? Anyway, I can stop looking into it. I just don't expect her to be anywhere but Fast and Furious.

Speaker 7:
[23:02] It's always surprising to me.

Speaker 4:
[23:04] Yeah, I agree completely. This movie has a 36 percent on Raw Tomatoes, a 35 on Metacritic, and a 6.6 on IMDb. Totally normal, even slightly above average score for IMDb.

Speaker 5:
[23:21] Normal.

Speaker 4:
[23:21] The budget was 33 million and it made 103 million. And I think this franchise in general made lots of money.

Speaker 5:
[23:30] The low critic score did not hamper their ability to keep making these movies.

Speaker 4:
[23:34] Yeah. But I'm curious about it because I think the studios are always a little nervous about making video game movies. But I didn't really do any research into that, so I guess we don't need to talk about it. But I feel like in general, I feel like I don't particularly love video game movies because they feel like video games. But you have a built-in audience with them, so it's like-

Speaker 5:
[24:06] Yeah. I feel like there's people who, if you love video games, I remember hearing this about The Last of Us show, people being like, it feels like the video game, and it's that I was a positive, because they love the video game.

Speaker 4:
[24:20] And the people who are fans of the video game are going to have very strong opinions about the movie. So that's also something you're signing up for when you're going to make a video game movie is like, we got to do the fans justice, or we're never going to hear the end of it. So interestingly, this movie did not include any of the main characters from the video games. Mila Jovovich's character is created for the movies. So kind of a bold move on their part. Yeah. But so there was some, not drama particularly, but Mila Jovovich signed on. And then they got Michelle Rodriguez. And because of Michelle Rodriguez's big recent success, they rewrote a lot of it for Michelle Rodriguez to be the badass that's doing all the action scenes. And Mila got kicked to the sidelines and became a damsel in distress essentially in the script. And so then when she showed up and like read the new script that she was supposed to be shooting, she was like, what the fuck is this? Like, I'm not doing this. Like we need to rewrite it. Oh my God. Again. And so she sat down with Paul WS. Anderson and they like went through it page by page. And she like helped write her character in a way that she felt good about that was like action oriented and like taking charge. And Michelle Rodriguez is still like doing more of the like fight scenes, but Mila also is doing fight scenes. Like it feels balanced. Like I don't think I would have known that. Like it didn't feel weird to me. But I had no idea about this. And a lot of people probably do know this. But this is where Mila and Paul WS. Anderson fell in love and they're married now with three kids.

Speaker 6:
[26:24] This is so- My gosh.

Speaker 5:
[26:27] Maybe it was exactly over building that character together. They really got to see eye to eye and he listened to her and she felt safe communicating her needs. Wow, look at them.

Speaker 4:
[26:40] And yeah, they made a bunch of these movies and he's directed her in other movies as well. So they've like continued to collaborate creatively. And I just had no idea and I think that's very fun and I'm happy for them. Some casting what ifs for Mila's part. It was originally going to go to Gwyneth Paltrow, which is just the most wrong thing. It's like one of the most wrong people you could cast in this. I'd love to see it. I'd love to see that movie, but it wouldn't feel right.

Speaker 5:
[27:18] It feels like a shockingly different movie.

Speaker 4:
[27:20] It wouldn't be right at all. Then Sarah Michelle Geller was also at one point, which feels more-

Speaker 5:
[27:26] That checks out a little more.

Speaker 4:
[27:27] More in line with it. This movie is on Roger Ebert's most hated movies list. Love to know when something particularly gets under his skin.

Speaker 5:
[27:39] Didn't sit right with Robert.

Speaker 4:
[27:41] But James Cameron says it's one of his great guilty pleasures.

Speaker 5:
[27:46] Oh my God, James, Jim.

Speaker 4:
[27:50] And he loves watching Michelle in it. And that's how I found out that she was an avatar because he's- The trivia was like, we worked together on Avatar and I like watching her in Resident Evil.

Speaker 5:
[28:06] I'm actually really excited to hear about this movie.

Speaker 4:
[28:08] Yeah. And I think it's fun. I think I came into it knowing what it is. Like a video game movie is going to be just kind of like you're moving place to place, having a little battle in each place.

Speaker 5:
[28:21] Levels.

Speaker 4:
[28:21] Going through levels. And if you can just kind of meet it where it's at, I think it's a lot of fun.

Speaker 5:
[28:28] I think I can.

Speaker 4:
[28:29] I think we can. I think that's where we're at, mentally and emotionally.

Speaker 5:
[28:33] Correct.

Speaker 4:
[28:35] We'll watch the trailer at the end. That'll be on our Patreon, and we're just going to get straight into this recap.

Speaker 10:
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Speaker 4:
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Speaker 5:
[31:32] Oh, my God. Take us there.

Speaker 4:
[31:34] Well, Emily, the place that we're going is Raccoon City.

Speaker 7:
[31:38] Okay.

Speaker 9:
[31:38] Did you see that coming?

Speaker 7:
[31:40] I super did not. Because it really threw me. I don't know if I could have ever, ever predicted that we'd be going to Raccoon City.

Speaker 5:
[31:51] And now, tell me more about Raccoon City.

Speaker 9:
[31:53] Well, it's not what you think.

Speaker 6:
[31:55] It's got nothing to do with raccoons?

Speaker 4:
[31:57] I mean, there probably are raccoons there, but it's just a really big city.

Speaker 5:
[32:01] Why is it called that?

Speaker 4:
[32:02] You know, I don't know.

Speaker 5:
[32:05] This is like Indrid Cole.

Speaker 7:
[32:06] This is just gonna sit in my brain as like, if you didn't want it to be a thing, you should have named it something normal. Like, either do or don't, you know?

Speaker 4:
[32:12] Yeah, and there's, again, like a bunch of these movies, a bunch of these video games, so maybe somewhere there we'll find an answer, and there's no way to know until we make our way through every single one of the movies, all of the material.

Speaker 5:
[32:28] Yeah, that is what we have to do.

Speaker 4:
[32:29] But we won't find an answer in this movie.

Speaker 5:
[32:31] Okay.

Speaker 4:
[32:32] So we begin with a big info dump, some text cards that tell us about the Umbrella Corporation, an evil corporation that's in charge of everything, and nothing like anything that exists in the real world. Completely fictional. The Umbrella Corporation, it tells us, has immeasurable political and financial influence. It's the world's leading supplier of computer tech and medical products. But secretly, if you can believe it, they're also manufacturing weapons, doing genetic experimentation, and creating viral weaponry. So they're doing some nasty stuff.

Speaker 5:
[33:21] Thank God it's fictional.

Speaker 4:
[33:23] Nothing like this happens in the real world. We see a lab and a scientist in a hazmat suit, head-to-toe covered, work in with some vials of one has a very neon, bright blue liquid in it, and one has a very neon green liquid in it. I'm like, great, okay, blue vials, green vials. So those are going to mean something.

Speaker 5:
[33:51] Yep.

Speaker 4:
[33:52] He's packing them up in a suitcase. And as he's like turning, he's the only one in this lab. As he's turning to leave, he throws one of the blue vials and it crashes, like breaks and also like smoke is evaporating from it. Yeah, it looks like a biohazard. I think so.

Speaker 5:
[34:18] Does he know that he broke it?

Speaker 4:
[34:19] Yes, and he immediately closes like an airlock door between him and the room.

Speaker 5:
[34:26] But is he not wearing like a big mask?

Speaker 2:
[34:28] He was and he took it off before he threw this.

Speaker 8:
[34:30] I'm like, what are you?

Speaker 5:
[34:32] Did he throw it on purpose?

Speaker 4:
[34:33] At the beginning, I don't think you really know.

Speaker 5:
[34:36] Got it.

Speaker 4:
[34:37] But yeah, he did. Okay.

Speaker 5:
[34:41] That maybe makes it make a little bit. But yeah, I mean, if this is such a big biohazard, we should be wearing protective PPE.

Speaker 4:
[34:51] Yes. But even though he sealed this door, we're seeing there's ventilation in this room. It's like going up through the vents. And we reveal we're in like some sort of really big office building. We're seeing people who work there, hearing like a fire alarm starting to go off. People are like, oh, it's just a fire drill. No one's really too panicked about it. And then we see these cages of dogs barking, like they can smell something. They seem like they're there, particularly for this reason, to smell if this ever happens. So all the dogs start barking. Now some employees are like getting a little stressed and they're like, hey, we better, yeah, I guess we better evacuate. And so now everyone's heading towards the exits, getting in the elevator. So one group of people makes it into the elevator. And as they're like going down, they, the elevator stops. And one guy immediately is like full panic mode, which like should be, to be fair.

Speaker 5:
[36:08] Yeah. This is why we don't trap ourselves in an elevator during an emergency scenario.

Speaker 4:
[36:14] Yeah. You're going to want to take the stairs.

Speaker 5:
[36:15] You're going to want to take the stairs. I think you're going to want to plan out work wherever this is, seems like a bad, bad place to work. So not to victim blame.

Speaker 4:
[36:24] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 8:
[36:25] No, I think you're right, though.

Speaker 9:
[36:26] These guys have had it coming.

Speaker 4:
[36:29] They hear, they're listening, trying to, the line is dead in the elevator. They can't call for help, so they're hearing some noise and listening, like, what is that? And here, the, like, neighboring elevator whoosh by way too fast, and then, like, we see it explode at the bottom of the shaft. That would suck. So now we're all panicking in this and trying to pry the doors open. Classic, between two floors. Of course. One woman is like, I'll try to climb out. And we see, as they pry open and we can see one floor, we see all the employees on that floor are dead on the ground. Everyone is dead. So I'm thinking, and this is because I just completed my emergency community response training. But yeah, I'm thinking maybe we don't want to be getting out of this elevator now. So you just always got to assess the situation based on the new information you get.

Speaker 5:
[37:40] Not a lot of good options I would glean here, but yeah, probably that's-

Speaker 4:
[37:47] Yeah. There's no winning in this situation, but she's trying to crawl out.

Speaker 5:
[37:55] She can see that everyone's dead?

Speaker 4:
[37:56] Yeah. Okay. And yeah, that's a sign that there might be some sort of gas, airborne, something going on. If everybody in the vicinity has seemed to suddenly drop dead.

Speaker 5:
[38:15] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[38:16] But we're worried that this elevator is about to crash and explode. So yeah, rockin a hard place. So she's crawling out when it seems like the elevator starts to power back on and lift up. And she's like, pull me back in, pull me back in. And it's like going up, up, up. And she's getting like closer to the top. Oh no. We've seen the elevator decapitation many times. So we're expecting it. We're going, no, no, no, no, no. And then it stops just right before. She gives a big few, oh my God, thank God. And then the brakes go and it goes way faster drops. She gets decapitated, all of them die. Cut to Mila Jovovich, waking up naked in the shower. There apparently was a lot of nudity in the original version of this script, which I don't think was Paul WS. Anderson. I think there was a script before he came on, but I read in the trivia that it was like, because she wakes up naked, you don't see, you do see a nip, but it's not gratuitous. But there was a version of this script where-

Speaker 5:
[39:24] Well, that's his future wife, so let's be respectful.

Speaker 4:
[39:28] Where she was supposed to have a fight scene completely naked here. And I think, yeah, they were like, yeah, we're not going to be doing that. So got rid of now. But she wakes up-

Speaker 7:
[39:43] Someone was so pissed. Oh, man. I really wanted it.

Speaker 4:
[39:50] Naked fight scenes are pretty fun. Yeah. But there's a time and a place.

Speaker 5:
[39:56] You got to earn it.

Speaker 4:
[39:56] Yeah. There's a leap pace naked fight scene. Oh, God. God, I love it. And then the Jennifer Lawrence naked fight scene. Really good. So, I'm not against the naked fight scene 100 percent of the time.

Speaker 5:
[40:12] Nobody hears against the naked fight scene, just to be clear.

Speaker 7:
[40:15] Let's be reasonable.

Speaker 4:
[40:17] So she wakes up, she looks very disoriented.

Speaker 5:
[40:23] Shower running?

Speaker 4:
[40:26] I think so. I think she turns it off.

Speaker 5:
[40:29] Okay.

Speaker 4:
[40:29] So she was like mid-shower and seems to have passed out and is now coming to. She grabs a robe, goes out into this like, this is like a very nice home. It's like a very grand bedroom. And there's a note on the dresser that says, today all your dreams come true. And she's looking very puzzled by this. She grabs the pen next to it and writes the same message. I think to see if it's her handwriting, she thought was fun. It's not, doesn't match hers. This all feels like very video gamey, you know, like here's a clue and here's a clue.

Speaker 5:
[41:11] Do you want to write the message yourself?

Speaker 4:
[41:14] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[41:15] I like have literally never played a video game in my life, but I get the gist.

Speaker 4:
[41:20] She opens some of the dresser drawers. And one of the drawers is filled with like some high tech looking weapons, has like a lock, code lock thing and just has like a bunch of crazy guns in it. She's shocked by this. Clearly has no idea where she is. She turns and on the bed laid out is an outfit. And so she changes into her, I think, I think pretty iconic outfit. It's like a red mini dress that has this asymmetrical hem with like, I think like little shorts or a mini skirt underneath it, and these big old combat boot things. She looks great, she's very badass. And she's continuing her investigation of the room, what the hell is going on. She finds a wedding photo of her and a man. So she's like, okay, I'm married to this man, I guess.

Speaker 5:
[42:34] This is... I would really hate to find myself in this situation.

Speaker 4:
[42:38] Yeah, it'd be really bad. It'd be really bad. I wrote, this is some June's Journey shit. Yeah. The only video game I play. She goes outside and we see that this is like a mansion. And she's calling out, hello, is anybody there? Nobody seems to respond. And she's going back inside when a man like pops out of nowhere and tries to pull her back and is like, stay away from the windows, stay away from the doors.

Speaker 5:
[43:11] Is it the same man from the wedding photo?

Speaker 4:
[43:13] No. And she's understandably like, get the fuck away from me, who the fuck are you? Don't touch me. But before they can get to the bottom of who each other are, through the windows comes a bunch of gas mask wearing soldiers, classic ropes flying in. Bust in through the windows and they grab Mila. Her name is Alice in this. I don't think they ever say that.

Speaker 5:
[43:43] But we can call her Mila.

Speaker 4:
[43:46] It's in the credits, so I guess that's her name. But they grab her and they grab the other guy whose name is, we learn, is Matt. Matt is saying, I work for the Raccoon PD.

Speaker 7:
[44:07] I'm a Raccoon City Government employee.

Speaker 5:
[44:11] It's so funny.

Speaker 4:
[44:12] They put him in cuffs, but not her. They're like, we'll check that we don't have the whatever we need right now to confirm that, so we'll just take you with us. And they kind of corner Mila. They're not cuffing her. And one of the soldiers takes off his mask and looks at her and he's like, I need your report, soldier. Give me the debrief. And she's like, what? He's like, the debrief, give me your report. She says she has no idea what he's talking about. He says something like, oh, the gas must have you must have your memory loss is one of the symptoms of the nerve gas. So it'll probably come back pretty soon.

Speaker 10:
[45:03] Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool.

Speaker 4:
[45:04] Fingers crossed.

Speaker 7:
[45:05] Yeah. Oh, that'll probably is probably come back.

Speaker 4:
[45:07] They're taking both of them with them. And this guy, his name is One. Okay. And one of the other soldiers takes off her mask and it's Michelle Rodriguez. Her name is Rain. Oh, they're looking at each other like we'll take them both down there. And one says, prepare for entry to the hive. And it's like heavy metal music is playing. And I hate to inform you that Marilyn Manson did the score for this movie.

Speaker 5:
[45:37] Well, it was 2002.

Speaker 4:
[45:39] It really is like the right choice for the time. It's so funny that I just always get such a kick out of these like insane metal scores in these types of movies. So aggressive. So they go into this like hidden little chamber thing that drops down subterranean below this mansion, and it's a train station. They all get on this train. And as they're in one of the train cars, there's like a door that's jammed and they pry it open and out falls the man we recognize from the photo, her husband. His name is Spence. He's unconscious. But as he like topples out of the compartment he was in, Alice has this flashback of like, I don't know, their wedding day or something.

Speaker 8:
[46:42] So she's just like, oh, that's my husband.

Speaker 4:
[46:45] He wakes up and he also can't remember anything. So there again, like the nerve gas, it'll come back eventually. But it's hard to say how fast.

Speaker 6:
[46:55] Probably in a pivotal moment.

Speaker 4:
[46:57] Probably whatever serves the narrative best.

Speaker 5:
[46:59] I think we can just assume it'll come back at a pretty crucial time.

Speaker 6:
[47:04] I think that's fair to say.

Speaker 4:
[47:08] So the Trayton has been traveling this whole time and they arrive at their destination. Alice says, Tell me what the hell is going on right now. Tell me where we are, what's happening.

Speaker 5:
[47:22] We're in Raccoon City, of course.

Speaker 4:
[47:23] Well, we're obviously in Raccoon City. You can't forget that. He tells her, you and I both work for the Umbrella Corporation. The mansion is a secret emergency entrance to the Hive. The Hive is one of the Umbrella Corporation's genetic testing facilities. They're doing pretty top secret stuff in there. And you are both, her and Spence, are security operatives that were stationed there to protect the entrance, basically. He tells them that their marriage is a sham, that they just work there, which is funny. Well, your marriage is a sham, so...

Speaker 7:
[48:06] Don't stress too much about that guy.

Speaker 5:
[48:08] Your marriage is a sham.

Speaker 4:
[48:10] And he turns to one of the other soldiers. There's a bunch of these soldiers, a lot of them are bodies to be killed later. So we don't need to really know all of them. But we got the whole crew, we got the computer guy, we got the medic, we got the muscle. There's all the usual crew that we're used to. So they call up computer guy. And they're like, show her the 3D render of The Hive. Show her the really sick 2002 animation of where we are. And so we see this animation that shows Raccoon City, a very populous city, and the mansion is just outside of it. And it follows the train path down to The Hive, which looks like a beehive. It's like a underground, I don't know, 20-story building. It tells you that 500 scientists and technicians work there, live there full-time on a top-secret project. And something has happened, and we need to investigate and figure out what went on down there. Matt asks, was it attacked? And one says, it's a bit more complicated than that. Building mystery.

Speaker 8:
[49:44] What the hell is going on?

Speaker 2:
[49:46] What the heck?

Speaker 4:
[49:47] So this 3D graphic also shows us their heat signatures. They are at the top of the hive now, and they need to get to the bottom, of course. So it's going to be going through levels.

Speaker 7:
[50:00] We're going to have to get through some levels.

Speaker 4:
[50:02] So they're making their way down. They're taking the stairs. Computer guy says, the red queen is locked on to us. She knows we're here. And Mila asks, what's the red queen? What are you talking about? Computer guy tells us she's just at the most state of the art, artificial intelligence. She's the computer that runs this facility. And whatever yesterday or whenever it was, she locked down the facility and killed everybody in here. And so I think they are trying to erase the red queen, like power down the artificial intelligence, because they think that it's gone rogue. So we're in a corridor in this facility, and Spence and Alice have a moment where he gives her his jacket. He's like, it's cold.

Speaker 7:
[51:06] We're not really married.

Speaker 4:
[51:07] Marriage is a sham. You don't need to give me your jacket.

Speaker 7:
[51:10] Probably I fucking hate you, actually.

Speaker 4:
[51:13] But just then, she has a flashback of them fucking.

Speaker 7:
[51:19] Oh, it doesn't seem so shammie to me.

Speaker 4:
[51:24] And then she asks him if he remembers anything from before the train, and he's like, no, I don't remember anything at all. What about you? And she's like, yeah, yeah, no. I also, me neither. Me neither. I also don't remember anything. We see one of the labs has been filled with water. Like a fire sprinkler had been going off while the doors were sealed and it just completely flooded it. And so all the scientists in there drowned. And one of them like jumpscare, there's a lot of jumpscares in this movie, but one of them like floats towards the glass window. And she's dead obviously, but it's a, it frightens everybody. And we're like, oh shit, okay. Well, we better, we better keep moving.

Speaker 5:
[52:16] Bad way to go.

Speaker 4:
[52:17] Yeah. So as they all keep making their way down, we see that drowned woman open her eyes, red, blood red eyes. She has reanimated.

Speaker 5:
[52:33] Zombie.

Speaker 4:
[52:33] None of them notice. So they make it to the bottom pretty quick. So.

Speaker 5:
[52:40] Oh, what the fuck?

Speaker 4:
[52:40] They're down there. And I guess our levels are going to be more about making it back up eventually.

Speaker 5:
[52:49] Sure. Cause that's how you get out. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[52:53] So they are following the computer guy's map. He's got the map of the whole facility and what each room is. So they're following his lead as they're trying to get to the computer mainframe probably. Seems like it. Seems like something they would do. And they have to go through this large room that's labeled dining hall B. And when they get in there, it's filled with all these human sized like metal chambers with, you know, all sorts of plugs and wires attached to all of them.

Speaker 5:
[53:36] Like Iron Maidens kind of, but with plugs.

Speaker 4:
[53:39] Yeah, yeah, like, yeah, like that. And everyone's really confused. Like, what, what is this? It's supposed to be the dining hall.

Speaker 5:
[53:49] Does everyone, the only people who don't have their memories are Mila and Staj, Stash? Who is he? Staj.

Speaker 9:
[53:59] Spence. Spence is his name.

Speaker 7:
[54:03] I think his name is Staj, actually.

Speaker 8:
[54:10] I think so, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[54:12] Yes, yes.

Speaker 5:
[54:13] Okay, so everybody else knows, but they're not scientists, so they may have never been in this lab.

Speaker 4:
[54:18] Yes, exactly. And everything in the lab is classified, and so they also don't have prior knowledge of what has been going on down here. Their muscle sent here to shut down, I think.

Speaker 5:
[54:34] They're probably going to learn some things along the way.

Speaker 4:
[54:36] I think they're probably going to learn some things along the way.

Speaker 5:
[54:38] Perhaps about their employer, they might not like it.

Speaker 4:
[54:40] And I think one of them even says right here, it seems like the Umbrella Company maybe has some secrets. Maybe they're hiding some secrets. Whoa. Maybe.

Speaker 5:
[54:51] In this top secret building where people work and live 24-7? Could be a place of secrets.

Speaker 4:
[54:57] Mila takes a peek in one of these little iron maidens and sees some nasty, like, tubes with blood flowing through them and, like, tissue looks like maybe some brain stuff. It's just, like, yeah, tissue, body parts that don't really add up to, like, a body.

Speaker 5:
[55:24] And why do we call these tissues?

Speaker 4:
[55:27] Hmm.

Speaker 3:
[55:30] I guess because... Okay.

Speaker 4:
[55:36] I have no idea. I have no idea.

Speaker 5:
[55:40] Does someone also... Sometimes when I don't feel like looking something up, I'll just ask it here.

Speaker 4:
[55:45] Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 7:
[55:46] Good. Does anyone know why we cry tears?

Speaker 5:
[55:50] Right.

Speaker 7:
[55:51] What is that about?

Speaker 5:
[55:53] What do they do?

Speaker 7:
[55:54] What's the purpose?

Speaker 5:
[55:55] What's the biological slash potentially evolutionary necessity of tears when you're sad? I've been thinking about it a lot this week and I'm just curious as to why it happens.

Speaker 4:
[56:10] Yeah. I thought you brought up a good point about it being also a way to signify to others how you're feeling. Yeah, that was Joel's point.

Speaker 5:
[56:22] And I also thought it was smart. I won't take credit for it.

Speaker 4:
[56:27] Because there is probably something to that, like a way to visually show others that you're in distress as some evolutionary thing.

Speaker 5:
[56:37] Right? It's gotta be something.

Speaker 7:
[56:38] And why your eyes?

Speaker 5:
[56:40] You know?

Speaker 7:
[56:41] Why tears out your eyes?

Speaker 4:
[56:43] I feel like when you're really crying, it's just coming out of everywhere.

Speaker 5:
[56:47] That's true. Everything does come out of everywhere. That is true.

Speaker 6:
[56:50] Well, not everything out of everywhere, but...

Speaker 5:
[56:53] But honestly, when you're really, when you're not just crying, but when you're like deeply in distress and sadness, everything kind of does come out of everywhere.

Speaker 4:
[57:04] That's true. I mean, there's, we've seen it in many...

Speaker 7:
[57:07] Your whole body gets so.

Speaker 4:
[57:09] We've seen in many horror movies as well, the pee in the pants and I guess we don't see as often the pooping, but it happens.

Speaker 7:
[57:19] But we know it happens.

Speaker 4:
[57:22] So yeah, I think there is a purge, a purging happening.

Speaker 5:
[57:28] And then your tear ducts just stay so swollen, they just stay so ready.

Speaker 7:
[57:37] It's just, it's just, how come? Anybody know?

Speaker 4:
[57:41] I remember seeing one of my friends once that had had cried so hard for so long, and her eyes were swollen, like, just looked like little tiny little sausages, like both of her eyelids.

Speaker 5:
[57:54] It's so wild.

Speaker 6:
[57:55] It was so sad.

Speaker 4:
[57:57] But it is, it's really crazy. It has a very physical impact.

Speaker 5:
[58:01] Oh, my God. Anyway, experts way in, I won't be Googling.

Speaker 4:
[58:09] So, okay, we need to, we're moving through past the dining room, dining hall, and it's kind of like, all right, well, guess we'll just keep continuing on our objective. This is pretty weird.

Speaker 5:
[58:23] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[58:24] We arrive at this corridor. That's like the last little passageway to get to the computer mainframe, computer guy sits down at the little computer table and is clacking away at the keys, typing in the codes, trying to lower the Red Queen's defenses, so that they can make it in there. And boy, is she fighting hard, this Red Queen.

Speaker 7:
[58:50] Oh, what a bitch.

Speaker 4:
[58:53] But he does power them down. And then, the entrance to the corridor opens.

Speaker 5:
[59:02] I wonder if some other entrances open.

Speaker 4:
[59:05] That's good thinking. One, the man named One.

Speaker 7:
[59:12] The man named One.

Speaker 4:
[59:15] Starts cautiously entering the corridor, gun drawn. All these lights turn on along the corridor, this behind me is the corridor. Freaky. It is freaky. It's kind of Mission Impossibly. You've seen this type of corridor.

Speaker 5:
[59:32] Yeah, I've seen this kind of vibe.

Speaker 4:
[59:33] And stuff. It's like mirrored walls with fluorescent lighting type of thing. And he's slowly moving to the other end. Three more of the soldiers are coming with him. They grab this duffel bag with whatever explosive device they're going to use to send an electrical charge through the mainframe that will take out the Red Queen. Wow. They've grabbed that. There are four of them are in this corridor. And as one gets to the other end of the corridor where that door is open to the mainframe, some sort of something's triggered. There's like a little trap in there. And both doors close. So the four of them are stuck in here. Everybody's immediately freaking out with good reason.

Speaker 5:
[60:37] One is one of the four?

Speaker 4:
[60:38] One is one of the four.

Speaker 5:
[60:42] And everybody else we know is not.

Speaker 4:
[60:44] Right. The medic is in there.

Speaker 5:
[60:48] That's tough.

Speaker 4:
[60:48] Which is tough. But the other two, I don't think we...

Speaker 5:
[60:54] Michelle Rodriguez and Computer Guy?

Speaker 4:
[60:56] Yeah, they're not in there.

Speaker 5:
[60:57] Okay.

Speaker 4:
[60:58] They're at the computer, the like switchboard, whatever. And Mila's yelling at Computer Guy, like, what's happening? Turn it off. Shut it down. He's like, I'm trying. You know, he's clacking. He's clacking. I can't type it so fast. Oh my God. He's got override, override, override.

Speaker 5:
[61:13] I can only type so fast. I can only type so fast.

Speaker 4:
[61:16] And this little laser beam appears at the front of the corridor and starts like moving towards them. Like it's going to slice through them. And it happens pretty, well, the first one happens kind of quick, but they all realize, mostly all realize pretty quickly. And so three of them dropped to the floor below it, except for the medic who like can't, doesn't figure out what, she doesn't know what's happening. So she just turns and looks and it just goes.

Speaker 5:
[61:56] The doctor was a woman.

Speaker 4:
[61:57] Can you believe it?

Speaker 2:
[61:59] Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Speaker 7:
[62:01] We gotta go back to the beginning.

Speaker 4:
[62:06] So, but they don't notice really that she has been sliced. It was at about throat level for her.

Speaker 2:
[62:13] Oh.

Speaker 4:
[62:14] So it's gone all the way through.

Speaker 5:
[62:15] Not a full hamburger, but.

Speaker 4:
[62:16] Not a full hamburger, but.

Speaker 5:
[62:19] Classic decapitation.

Speaker 4:
[62:21] So decapitation, but it's also the classic, like the head's just staying on for a little bit.

Speaker 5:
[62:26] Just a clean little.

Speaker 4:
[62:26] And it seems like it did nothing happen at all. Like we just see one little drop of blood on her neck and a little line starting to form. But one of the other guys, his hand was up too high. And so his hand is like sliced in half. And so they're all calling to her like, medic, medic, get over here, medic. And then that's when they turn and see her head slide off her body. And then pretty immediately another laser is loads up again, coming from moving from the front to the back. They all like gear up trying to maneuver their way around wherever this laser is is going to come. It starts really low. And one of the guy closest to it goes to jump over it. And as he jumps, it raises. So he gets, I think, kind of a hot dog style, but hot dog prone.

Speaker 7:
[63:32] Almost like he almost gets filleted.

Speaker 4:
[63:35] Yeah.

Speaker 7:
[63:35] I'd call that more of a fillet.

Speaker 4:
[63:37] Yeah, like a brandzino.

Speaker 7:
[63:38] Yeah. He got butterfly.

Speaker 4:
[63:43] Yes. Ooh, that sounds really bad.

Speaker 7:
[63:48] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[63:49] So now it's high, and I think kills the other guy as well. He tries to go low. I don't know. I think it decapitates him too. I can't totally remember. And then one is the last one left, and he lifts himself up and is like parallel to the ceiling, like holds himself as close to the ceiling as he can, and so it can't reach him. So he dodges it. He drops down. We're all screaming, what the computer guy? Fucking hurry up. You need to get the Red Queen's defense.

Speaker 2:
[64:30] Things are really bad in here.

Speaker 3:
[64:32] He's like, I'm so close.

Speaker 4:
[64:33] I've almost got it. I just need to type a few more things. And one last laser is coming. One, the man is like, does like kind of the Henry Cavill in Mission Impossible, like get loading his fists, getting ready.

Speaker 3:
[64:51] Yeah, that'll help you.

Speaker 4:
[64:54] And the laser is coming. It's like mid-level. He's deciding what to do when it changes into a crosshatch pattern that's just like a dense checkers from floor to ceiling, wall to wall. And he just kind of goes, oh fuck, and gets sliced into little cubes. And just one second later, computer guy turns it off, but it is too late and they have all died. And one was seeming like kind of the main guy. He has like main soldier guy energy. Uh-oh. So I was surprised. My jaw dropped in this scene. Wow. And the effects are, I love these kinds of effects that are just the early tooth. This is like Cube does this. I love it. It's just like looks pretty bad, but also is just fun. You know, we're just having fun.

Speaker 5:
[65:56] Yeah. We're doing what we can. We're doing the most of what we have.

Speaker 4:
[66:01] Computer guy is really fucked up by this. He's obviously riddled with guilt.

Speaker 5:
[66:09] Yeah. I mean, it's not like, well, you know, you could only work as fast as you could work.

Speaker 4:
[66:14] He's doing the best he can.

Speaker 5:
[66:17] But that is tough.

Speaker 4:
[66:19] There's, yeah, like a moment of silence. It's also, I think, just him and Mila and maybe Matt in the computer room. I think the other soldiers are still in the dining hall, like guarding the entrance, so they don't know what has happened.

Speaker 5:
[66:35] So they're not going to, that's bad news to deliver.

Speaker 8:
[66:38] Yeah, they're not going to like that.

Speaker 4:
[66:40] But computer guy's like, we still have to go in there.

Speaker 5:
[66:43] So now we have to, they really didn't want us in there.

Speaker 4:
[66:47] Yeah. He grabs the bag, he has to grab it from, bag didn't get sliced, I guess, but he grabs the duffel in the hallway and Mila reluctantly joins him. Oh no, I think it's Spence that's also with them, Spence is like, I really don't want to go in there, but he also reluctantly joins, doesn't really matter, who cares. They all go in, they're getting ready to load up this bomb thing that's going to deliver some sort of electrical blast to the Red Queen's main frame. Just then a hologram appears, a red hologram of a little British girl.

Speaker 2:
[67:35] She's saying, please get out, get out.

Speaker 4:
[67:39] You can't be in here, you must get out. And computer guy is saying, don't listen to her, it's the Red Queen, it's her hologram that she's gonna try to get in your head and play mind games, you can't listen to her, we have to do what we have to do. And little British hologram girl gets kind of serious. And she says, you're all going to die down here. And just then he does what he has to do, explodes the mainframe, she disappears. Wow. What a great final message to hear. No. So with this explosion, the power goes down in the whole hive. And with that, all the doors open.

Speaker 5:
[68:34] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[68:36] She's not going to be great. So because of this, Michelle Rodriguez, also known as Rain, she's so not a Rain.

Speaker 5:
[68:50] She's so not a Rain.

Speaker 4:
[68:51] Just, she's not right. She's Michelle Rodriguez.

Speaker 5:
[68:55] She's Michelle Rodriguez or she's whatever her name is. Michelle. In Fast and Furious.

Speaker 4:
[69:00] Yeah, Letty.

Speaker 5:
[69:01] Letty. She's a Letty.

Speaker 4:
[69:02] She's a Letty. Like I don't, I would not be like, oh, Michelle.

Speaker 5:
[69:07] My friend Michelle.

Speaker 4:
[69:08] This is my friend Michelle. I'd say this is my friend Michelle Rodriguez.

Speaker 5:
[69:13] This is my friend Michelle Rodriguez from Fast and Furious is what I would say. It's what you, that's her full name.

Speaker 4:
[69:18] Exactly. So Michelle Rodriguez finds a, what she thinks is a survivor. Now that the doors are open, someone in a lab coat is stumbling out and she's like, we got, someone survived. We gotta help them. She goes and rushes to the aid of this person. We see pretty quickly that it's definitely a zombie. Michelle Rodriguez is like, is holding her, like trying to prop her up cause she's slumped over and immediately this woman bites Michelle Rodriguez right on the hand. We're breaking skin. We know that that's not gonna be good. Michelle Rodriguez is calling out to one of the other soldiers.

Speaker 8:
[70:04] She bet me, girls, this woman's crazy.

Speaker 4:
[70:06] Help me, help me. Cause the woman is continuing to attack her. She's a zombie. And so she's on top of her and trying to eat her. The other soldier guy, his name is JD. JD comes in and is like, ma'am, ma'am.

Speaker 5:
[70:20] Miss, let's be reasonable here.

Speaker 4:
[70:22] Pulls her off, kind of shoves her back a bit, and this zombie woman continues slowly. They're very slow moving zombies. Slowly just like charging back, a slow charge, the slow charge back at them. And he's giving her warnings. JD is saying, stop right there, stop right there. This is your last warning. He's got his gun drawn. He's like, I'm gonna shoot, I'm gonna shoot.

Speaker 7:
[70:51] You can't freaking talk to those ladies.

Speaker 4:
[70:53] He's not being reasonable, shoots her in the leg. She doesn't bother her at all. Shoots her in the other leg, doesn't bother her at all.

Speaker 5:
[71:03] Yeah, that's a bad sign.

Speaker 4:
[71:05] Michelle Rodriguez grabs her machine gun and just unloads on this woman, shoots her a whole bunch of times. That does the trick. She falls down and just as like, I think the rest of the group comes back from the mainframe room, so we're all re-gathering and they're like, what's the gunshots? Everyone's like, what's happening? They're like, oh, this lady, she was crazed, she bit me.

Speaker 5:
[71:39] We shot her and she didn't react.

Speaker 4:
[71:40] We shot her and then they look and her body is gone. She's not there anymore.

Speaker 5:
[71:45] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[71:45] They're like, that's not possible. Matt.

Speaker 5:
[71:48] Now, who's Matt?

Speaker 4:
[71:49] Matt is the guy from the opening who was in the mansion.

Speaker 5:
[71:52] Who they're arresting.

Speaker 4:
[71:54] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[71:54] Is he handcuffed?

Speaker 4:
[71:55] He's still in handcuffs. I'll be honest, there is a point at which he's not in handcuffs anymore. I do remember him seeing the keys. I don't remember him actually getting out of the handcuffs, but he is still in handcuffs for this scene. And he looks at the blood splatter on the ground, and it's coagulated. And he says, this blood is coagulated, that's impossible. And they say, why?

Speaker 5:
[72:21] Do we know what Matt's deal is?

Speaker 4:
[72:23] No.

Speaker 5:
[72:23] Are we about to find out?

Speaker 4:
[72:24] He's a little like shifty-eyed. We've seen shots of him glancing around.

Speaker 5:
[72:29] Maybe kind of an Austin Abrams kind of vibe.

Speaker 4:
[72:31] Kind of an Austin Abrams vibe. Yeah, that would be fun. He tells them that it's impossible because your blood only coagulates after you die. So if you were bleeding from a gunshot wound in your leg, it would not have been coagulated. So we're putting two and two together here. Then we're hearing zombie moans and groans and shuffling. Now that all these doors are opened, they're all headed towards the noise that everyone's making in this room. And so pretty quickly, they are completely surrounded by zombies. I didn't really write down any of the details of the zombie attacks, which you'd think is kind of maybe what we'd want to lean into for the purposes of this podcast, the nastiness of it, but it really all blurs together and feels like a video game of just like nonstop, like I'll describe some of it.

Speaker 5:
[73:27] Zombie attack, zombie kill, shoot him, they're after you.

Speaker 6:
[73:30] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5:
[73:31] Nice points.

Speaker 4:
[73:35] There is one zombie that has like in the long walk, like the broken ankle, like it's broken full 90 degrees. And so he's like walking on his like side of his foot and that's really nasty. And he's dragging a big ax.

Speaker 11:
[73:50] Where'd he get that?

Speaker 4:
[73:52] I don't know, I guess. I guess he just found it. But yeah, that honestly does feel like too much of a like brain, a working brain to like even to know to get an ax.

Speaker 5:
[74:08] Yeah. Unless he like died with the ax in his hand. He's the ax guy.

Speaker 4:
[74:11] Which I, maybe he's the ax guy.

Speaker 5:
[74:13] Maybe he's trying to break down a door or something.

Speaker 4:
[74:16] Yeah.

Speaker 7:
[74:17] What's his backstory?

Speaker 4:
[74:19] Look, I got to know more about this ax guy. Yeah, he's using tools and I feel like zombies don't use tools.

Speaker 5:
[74:29] Yeah. I also feel that way.

Speaker 4:
[74:33] So anyways.

Speaker 5:
[74:35] This movie is ridiculous.

Speaker 4:
[74:38] I hope they answer that more in the future films.

Speaker 5:
[74:40] Yeah, I get it right, okay? I get it right.

Speaker 4:
[74:44] So they're surrounded, they are attacked, shooting, shooting, points, points. Alice hits her head and has another flashback in this moment, and we see her in a cemetery talking to a woman who we don't recognize, and Alice is telling this woman, I can help you get the virus, I have access to security codes, but there will be a price. That's all we see.

Speaker 8:
[75:13] Alice is like, what the hell, what is going on, what's this, what did I do?

Speaker 4:
[75:19] This is all pretty chaotic. They get split up. I'm not sure exactly who's where, but I think they're trying to, I think still in dining hall B, and so they're trying to get to the next room over, and most of the rooms have a ceiling door between them. So they're like, come this way, we just got to get to the other side of this door. This is JD leading the charge, and he opens the door, and it is even more zombies in there.

Speaker 5:
[75:49] Oh, darn.

Speaker 4:
[75:52] Tumble out basically on top of JD, and JD gets eaten alive real quick. Then yeah, I don't really remember the mechanics of how they get out of this one. I think they eventually close that door and get most of those guys back in. There's tons of them. There's 500 people working in this facility, so we know that there's probably 500 zombies that we're gonna have to deal with. But somehow they're able to kind of get back to safety, and they are separated for the most part. So the next scene we see is the empty dog cages that we saw in the early. It's gonna be zombie dogs, I know, I'm sorry. But they're actually pretty funny, I think.

Speaker 5:
[76:43] Okay, cool.

Speaker 4:
[76:45] And in the trivia, I heard that they were really hard to work with because they kept wanting... Because I guess they costumed them in like meat. And so all the dogs just like were trying to eat the meat off of each other, obviously.

Speaker 5:
[77:02] What kind of dogs were they? They're like German shepherds?

Speaker 4:
[77:04] They're Rottweilers. Rottweilers. And so we see all those empty cages and, yeah, us the audience are like, uh-oh, zombie dogs. Mia Mielejovich, I've seen me defaulting to my former pronunciation, she doesn't know that. So she's exploring, getting in there. What's this lab area? And then we see one zombie dog turn the corner and she freezes and then runs. I had Wes's voice in my mind of like, don't turn and run, but also she, there was like a little safe room right there. So it did, it does seem like the right call.

Speaker 5:
[77:49] I mean, you know, I mean, it's a zombie. So did the same rules apply?

Speaker 4:
[77:52] True, true. Yeah. We're dealing with a lot of unknowns here. Yeah. So she makes it to the lab, she seals herself in there.

Speaker 5:
[78:05] Is the zombie dog fast?

Speaker 4:
[78:07] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[78:08] Oh, bummer.

Speaker 4:
[78:10] Which is a good point. What's going on there?

Speaker 5:
[78:12] Yeah. Why is that one fast?

Speaker 4:
[78:14] Why is that one fast?

Speaker 5:
[78:14] Because dogs are faster than humans.

Speaker 7:
[78:16] Are dogs faster than humans?

Speaker 4:
[78:19] They must be.

Speaker 5:
[78:19] On average, probably, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[78:22] I would think so.

Speaker 5:
[78:24] So is it the relative speed?

Speaker 4:
[78:24] The only way we're going to find out is we got to go race some dogs.

Speaker 5:
[78:29] I mean, the people do that and they shouldn't, obviously.

Speaker 4:
[78:33] Oh, I meant like we compete with the dogs, not the dogs racing each other. I meant in humane conditions.

Speaker 7:
[78:38] You meant best of three being a dog, side by side.

Speaker 4:
[78:45] Exactly.

Speaker 7:
[78:46] Plain and fair, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[78:50] Start line, finish line.

Speaker 5:
[78:51] Exactly, exactly.

Speaker 7:
[78:53] Winner takes all for the whole species.

Speaker 4:
[78:57] Yep, everyone goes home after and gets a little bit.

Speaker 5:
[79:02] And nice has a nice night, yep.

Speaker 4:
[79:05] So she seals herself in the lab and turns around and is immediately attacked by a scientist that was in there, zombie scientist. And her instincts as a security officer start coming back and she like jumps and kicks him in the head and kicks him dead with one kick. And she has this look of surprise at her own skills. And she's like remembering like, Oh, right.

Speaker 9:
[79:39] Oh my God, I'm a troll.

Speaker 3:
[79:42] Holy shit.

Speaker 4:
[79:43] I'm drained for this. And it's coming back to her. And so she realizes she has these abilities. So she's like, OK, I can go out and handle this one dog, I think. And she opens the door and kind of moves out of the way so that the dog runs into the room. She seals the dog into the lab. She's like, great. And just then all the rest of the dogs arrive. There's like 10 of them. They're all growling at her, all covered in real edible meat.

Speaker 5:
[80:23] And why are they covered in meat?

Speaker 4:
[80:26] I think it's supposed to give the illusion if they don't have skin anymore, like that they're just muscle now.

Speaker 5:
[80:33] They are meat.

Speaker 4:
[80:34] They are the meat.

Speaker 5:
[80:37] Got it.

Speaker 4:
[80:39] But it looks really silly. And apparently it was a bad filming decision. But so there's, she has no choice now but to fight all these dogs. So she, and she has a gun. And so she just starts shooting. She's killing these dogs. And then she runs out of bullets. And she has, I remember this shot somehow, must have been in a trailer somewhere where she like matrix style, like runs along the wall to like get momentum.

Speaker 5:
[81:15] I remember that too.

Speaker 4:
[81:17] And round house kicks this dog to death.

Speaker 7:
[81:23] Okay, love a signature move.

Speaker 5:
[81:26] She's like, I can kick, I can kick something in the head.

Speaker 6:
[81:30] Yep, and she does.

Speaker 4:
[81:31] Yep.

Speaker 5:
[81:32] Kind of like Rebecca Ferguson's like thigh around the neck move.

Speaker 4:
[81:35] I was thinking of Rebecca Ferguson a bit. So we cut to Matt has, he's out of the cuffs somehow. And in the commotion, he was able to free himself and sneak away. And he's in the more like corporate officey part where there's desks, and he's looking for something or the like. He definitely has like a purpose here. And he goes to a desk and finds a key card for a woman named Lisa. And we recognize her as the woman in the flashback that Alice was having. And we see zombie Lisa coming up behind Matt pretty quietly. But he turns just in time. And you can see there's like a motion there. And he's like, he's like, Lisa and we're like, no, she's looking less zombie-ish than the rest, but we know she's still a zombie. And she does lunge at him and attack him. And he's fighting her off pretty good, but it looks like she's getting the better of him and just when it looks like it's about to turn, Alice comes in and kills her and also recognizes her as, oh, that's the lady from whatever I did. He asks Matt, she asks Matt who she was. He says, it was my sister. And we were planning to be whistleblowers, essentially. We were trying to get documents out of here to show what the Umbrella Corporation was doing. We want to bring it down. Says she had a contact that was supposed to help her, but maybe the contact turned on her, and maybe that's why all of this happened.

Speaker 7:
[83:46] Who could possibly be, oh gosh.

Speaker 6:
[83:49] Who would do such a thing?

Speaker 5:
[83:51] If that's true, I sure hope somebody remembers it.

Speaker 4:
[83:56] So they reunite with the main group. Some point in here also, the computer guy does break the news that everybody else is dead. And they're upset, obviously, but there's a lot going on. So the moment passes pretty quickly. They're like back at the hallway room. I think they're just trying to like find any way out. And all the bodies are gone from the hallway.

Speaker 5:
[84:26] So their numbers are only growling.

Speaker 4:
[84:28] Yeah. At some point, we do get there. They have like one hour to get out. I think Michelle Rodriguez delivers this piece of news that the fail safe like backup plan is if we're not all out of here by a certain time that they are just going to seal it off and like destroy like will die in here.

Speaker 5:
[84:49] Why wouldn't they just do that and not send people in there?

Speaker 4:
[84:53] Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 5:
[84:55] All right.

Speaker 4:
[84:56] But yeah, that the main priority is containing the incident. They can't figure out how the fuck to get out. How are we going to get out of here? There's zombies at like all of the places that we would need to be able to move up. And Alice says, I know what we're going to do. We're turning the Red Queen back on. Like she'll know how to help us. And everyone's like, that's a bad idea. But Alice is dead set on it. She's like, this is our only chance we're going to die down here anyways. So like, what else do you suggest? And eventually they're all like, yeah, okay, fine. Turn her back on. We get our little British girl voice again. She says, I did warn you, didn't I? She's a little sassy, but she's telling them about the T-virus, which is what the released blue vial was. It like started as a medical breakthrough where they were able to regenerate human tissue, but it ended up also being able to reanimate the dead, which has highly profitable, profitable military applications. And so they were like, the Umbrella Corporation, I believe, was like trying to sell it, where I think the Red Queen like is like, I couldn't allow that to leave the facility. So I think the Red Queen did go rogue in-

Speaker 5:
[86:41] But she's good.

Speaker 4:
[86:42] In a way to protect humanity.

Speaker 5:
[86:45] She did kill a lot of people.

Speaker 4:
[86:47] She did, but for a greater good.

Speaker 5:
[86:48] Right.

Speaker 4:
[86:49] The greater good.

Speaker 5:
[86:50] The greater good.

Speaker 4:
[86:52] Yeah, it's muddy for sure. But I think she was trying to-

Speaker 5:
[86:57] She's doing her best.

Speaker 4:
[86:59] She- Prevent.

Speaker 2:
[87:00] You do your best with what you got.

Speaker 4:
[87:03] You do your best with what you got, even if you're AI. She tells them that, yeah, she did what she had to do. And she says, I also can't allow you guys to leave because some of you have been bitten and now you're infected too. Uh-oh. But they do somehow strong arm her into telling them how to get up to the top at least. I don't really understand the back and forth here entirely, but they find that there are utility tunnels that are not on the map. And so they're able to crawl into like pipes, pipe crawl spaces. They're pretty big. They're not crawl spaces, but they are just rooms filled with pipes. So they go into there and there are some zombies in there. First, they get attacked and JD is one of the zombies. And Michelle Rodriguez has a moment of hesitation because it's JD. And she's like, JD, my old buddy. And he lunges at her.

Speaker 5:
[88:23] This dude had to and fight his sister, so.

Speaker 4:
[88:26] Yeah. And this guy bites her right on the neck.

Speaker 5:
[88:30] Aye, aye, well, she has already been bitten. So what's one more?

Speaker 4:
[88:35] She does kill him after that. And it's a non-fatal neck. Well, it's gonna be fatal, but not immediately fatal. Not like ripping out the throat or anything. And they're able to climb on top of the pipes to be able to like be above the zombies. So their pipes are high enough and like elevated.

Speaker 5:
[88:59] Do they all know that she's been bitten?

Speaker 4:
[89:01] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[89:02] Okay.

Speaker 8:
[89:03] And I think somebody else has been bitten too.

Speaker 4:
[89:05] I can't remember. But like there's a couple of bitten people and yeah, it's like, it seems like they're not taking that seriously enough.

Speaker 5:
[89:18] Because now we're in some small spaces together.

Speaker 4:
[89:21] Right. Yeah. So they're all able to get up onto the pipes except for computer guy.

Speaker 5:
[89:29] Too dorky.

Speaker 4:
[89:31] He's too dorky.

Speaker 5:
[89:32] He couldn't figure it out.

Speaker 4:
[89:34] Couldn't do it. Couldn't figure it out. He can only figure out computers. So he gets marooned on a different pipe that doesn't go anywhere. So he's just stranded. They're going to come back for him, or they seem like they want to try and he tells them no. He shows that he has a gun. He's like, just leave me. I have one bullet left. That's all I need implying that he's going to take his own life.

Speaker 5:
[90:05] You're still going to become a zombie.

Speaker 4:
[90:08] Well, we do know that it's like regular zombie rules, that if the brain dies, that it's not, I might be wrong about that, but I think your best bet would be shooting yourself in the brain to try to prevent the zombie-ness from happening. The T-virus from getting you. But yeah, I'm not positive. He might. So he loads his one bullet up as they're like crying, like, oh, computer guy, we're going to miss you. But they continue on. And he's, all the zombies are like clawing up at him, getting a little closer. Child is like figuring out how to get closer and closer to him. He's got his one bullet. He's holding it up to his temple. We cut to the rest of them in a little crawl space further away. And we hear the gunshot. They all cringe like, oh man, computer guy cut back to computer guy. And he's just killed one of the zombies. And he's like, you're going to have to work for your dinner or whatever.

Speaker 5:
[91:20] This is really wild choice.

Speaker 4:
[91:21] It's really crazy to me.

Speaker 5:
[91:23] Like it's going to be so much worse for you, my dude.

Speaker 6:
[91:26] This is going to be a lot worse.

Speaker 7:
[91:29] You just signed yourself up to be slowly eaten to death by zombies.

Speaker 4:
[91:34] Yeah.

Speaker 6:
[91:36] Hate that for you.

Speaker 4:
[91:37] Hate that for him. He's still stranded there as they continue on. And we see a glimpse in another part of the facility of, oh, because something that happened when the power went off also, is that all those little iron maiden chambers became unlocked too. And we do see one of them is open. And we had previously looked a little bit inside them. It looked like kind of like brains and bloody tubes. And we now get a glimpse of a full monster looking creature crawling around that kind of looks like the Quiet Place Monsters. It has like really big hands and claws and kind of like a little crawly small body.

Speaker 7:
[92:31] Big hands, big claws, crawly small body.

Speaker 4:
[92:33] Crawly small body, yeah. And skinless and covered in meat. Covered in meat, just dripping in bloody meat. Alice has another flashback. She's remembering she must have been in the lab at some point, because she remembers blue vile and green vile, and blue is the virus and green is the antivirus. So there is a cure, and Michelle Rodriguez, she tells the group that she's like, there's a cure, there's a cure. Michelle Rodriguez, who's looking like absolute shit, she's been bitten twice, she's losing some blood, she's not doing great. So she's like, I was starting to get worried. Making quips, one-liners. She's never not going to be sassy. And just then, Spence has a flashback. I think we're in the lab. So the lab from the beginning that we saw now, this has multiple labs in this facility, but this is the one from the beginning. And now Spence has a flashback, and we see that he is the one that released the virus in the first place.

Speaker 5:
[93:49] Tough to be having these flashbacks.

Speaker 4:
[93:53] But he kind of, with this flashback, I guess, like remembers that he's a bad guy, too, and immediately goes into, like, drawing his gun and aiming it.

Speaker 7:
[94:01] Oh, a piece of shit.

Speaker 4:
[94:03] That's right.

Speaker 5:
[94:04] Oh, yeah, I don't like that about me.

Speaker 4:
[94:09] He pulls a gun on all of them, and he is still trying to kind of convince Alice to come with him. Like, we're going to be so rich. I have the case of the virus and the antivirus back in the train. I almost made it out. This was going to be our big break. He's the one that wrote, today, all your dreams come true. But Alice does not like this, and they all see in the lab behind him. One of the lab techs or something was in there and is now a zombie and slowly crawling towards him. So they're all watching, as he's giving his little evil speech, they're like, well, you're about to find out. Fuck around and find out you're about to. And so he gets bitten, but then kills the zombie. He's bitten on the leg by the zombie, kills the zombie and quickly runs out of the lab, seals them in there and just runs to the train because there's anti-virus in there. And so he's like, I can just inject myself with the anti-virus, no big deal.

Speaker 5:
[95:21] No big deal.

Speaker 4:
[95:22] They somehow, for narrative purposes, I presume, have like a security camera following him. So we're able to see everything he does. They're able to see everything he does after he leaves them locked in a room. And he makes it to the train. He gets the suitcase out. He pulls out the anti-virus. He starts preparing to inject it into himself when he hears some metal clanging and something big moving around. He looks and is immediately attacked by Big Hand Crawly Body Guy.

Speaker 5:
[95:59] Big Hand, Big Claws, Smallish Crawly Body.

Speaker 4:
[96:04] It's just basically torn apart. Looks really bad.

Speaker 5:
[96:09] Big Hands, Big Claws.

Speaker 4:
[96:10] Yeah. Oh, yeah. These creatures are called the Lickers. They have also really, really long tongues. Really gross names. Tongues aren't always out, but they come out sometimes.

Speaker 5:
[96:21] You got to be careful of the Lickers at Raccoon City.

Speaker 7:
[96:24] Let's talk about the Lickers in Raccoon City.

Speaker 4:
[96:29] Really, really nasty. They're able to still talk to the Red Queen through the comms system or something in this room, and they're trying to plead with her to open the door for them. Again, she's like, well, I can't let you out because you're infected. They're like, but the antivirus is out there. She's like, well, that's not a guarantee. It's not 100 percent effective all the time. This lady's been bitten a couple of times now, and so I'll only let you out if you kill her first. Kill her in here, and then I'll let you out. Props to Michelle Rodriguez. She's like, I think you guys should do it. I think you should kill me, but they don't want to, obviously. Alice is doing the like, ah, oh my god, why? She has an ax in hand.

Speaker 8:
[97:24] Michelle Rodriguez is saying, do it, just fucking do it. She's like, ah, she's raising it.

Speaker 4:
[97:30] She's psyching herself up for something, and she brings the ax down onto the comms panel so that it cuts off the red queen. So she can't communicate with them anymore, and they're still stuck in this room, though. Until Computer Guy comes back and saves them.

Speaker 9:
[97:54] He somehow got out of there.

Speaker 7:
[97:56] Oh, well, that's great news.

Speaker 4:
[97:59] Good for him.

Speaker 3:
[98:00] Wow, thank god.

Speaker 4:
[98:02] Really didn't think that that was going to go his way. So he's able to obviously clickety-clack away and override and open that door. They run to the train. They pass Spence's body, which is like starting to reanimate, but he's really fucked up, so he can like barely crawl. They get on the train. It's going back up to the mansion, and they inject rain. She's just on the freaking brink though, and she looks like she dies, and then comes back. She's still alive, not dead yet, and there's I think a few too many ups and downs with this.

Speaker 6:
[98:57] Like, is she going to die or not?

Speaker 5:
[98:59] Is she dead? Is zombie dead?

Speaker 4:
[99:00] Is she dead?

Speaker 3:
[99:01] Is she regular?

Speaker 5:
[99:03] Is that as a zombie, or is she just surviving?

Speaker 4:
[99:07] So a lot of, it's a roller coaster with her. Then we got a liquor on the train.

Speaker 5:
[99:16] Oh yeah, we got a liquor on the train.

Speaker 4:
[99:18] It attacks, it's tongues flying all around the room. Slapping people and stuff.

Speaker 5:
[99:25] Ah!

Speaker 4:
[99:26] It's claws matte, which is bad, because even a scratch is enough for infection. Red Queen told us that, I forgot to say. Kills computer guy, so that's a bummer.

Speaker 5:
[99:40] Well, he, you know, thank you for the plot device, my guy.

Speaker 9:
[99:45] Yeah.

Speaker 4:
[99:46] Big, crazy fight. I didn't, I don't really remember anything except for, there's a point where Alice, like, nails his tongue down. And they drop out the floor of the train below it. So it's like hanging from its tongue, being dragged under the train for a while, and then it, like, explodes.

Speaker 5:
[100:12] Yeah.

Speaker 6:
[100:13] So great.

Speaker 5:
[100:15] Great. Do we have more antivirus?

Speaker 4:
[100:19] Yes.

Speaker 5:
[100:21] Is it just Alice and Matt now?

Speaker 4:
[100:23] It's now just Alice and Matt.

Speaker 7:
[100:24] They make it to the top.

Speaker 4:
[100:25] They've got their suitcase. They are both, like, crying. They've obviously, this, she looks on the verge of collapsing. She's just so traumatic. And he's, like, comforting her. And she's like, oh, my God, we got to get you the antivirus. Of course, they start gearing it up. And then they are ambushed by people in hazmat suits that grab them and pull them apart. She's like, she's calling out, Matt, Matt. His wound, his, his scratches on his shoulder, it's starting to, like, mutate. There's, like, hairs growing out of it and stuff. Something nasty is happening. He's pulled off out of sight, screaming. She's pulled in a different direction. And we're hearing this doctor's voice. I think this doctor is a character in the video game. And he's saying we need to re-open the hive and find out what went on down there. So we're just hearing some bad, some bad news. I think she's, like, injected with some sort of anesthesia.

Speaker 2:
[101:44] Yeah, sedative.

Speaker 4:
[101:45] Yeah, sedative. She's losing consciousness. And we see, as she's passing out, like, the doctor's face, and it's Jason Isaacs. Sure. Apparently, him and Paul WS. Anderson are just like best friends. So he just did it for funsies.

Speaker 5:
[102:06] Yeah, I love that.

Speaker 4:
[102:08] And he was planning to come back for the later ones, but I guess schedule wise didn't work out. So I don't think he's actually in Harry Potter ever again.

Speaker 8:
[102:14] Yeah. Yeah, Harry Potter.

Speaker 5:
[102:16] That took up a lot of his time, I think, probably.

Speaker 4:
[102:17] Taken up some time, for sure. So fade to black, come back up in a big fluorescent lighting room, medical room slash prison room. It has a two-way mirror, one way two-way mirror. Alice is on a table in the middle of the room, covered with IV-type things, like tubes coming out of all parts of her. She wakes up screaming. She was supposed to be naked in this scene too, I read. But they put her in a funny little, it's almost fifth element-y, her little fifth element wraps. It's a square of paper on either, a rectangle of paper on either side that are connected with those little clippies. Kind of like an A-frame suit. She's essentially wearing an A-frame. She wakes up screaming. She pulls out all, this part is pretty nasty. She's pulling out all of the needles that are in her and it looks really painful. She's screaming at the two-way mirror, like, let me out, let me out. We see now on the other side of the mirror, nobody's there. It's empty and it's kind of pulling back and everything is empty. Oh, no. And she is able to open the door and she is looking around, confused, what the fuck is going on? She makes her way, she like finds a gun, makes her way out of the building, into the heart of Raccoon City, which is just absolutely apocalyptic. No living people in sight, cars upturned, crashes, everything like smoking, fires, clearly something very bad has happened here. A newspaper drifts by, top headline, the dead walk. And she grabs her gun and kind of loads it, does like a ready to fight.

Speaker 9:
[104:42] Darn it, Merrill Manson is absolutely blasting.

Speaker 4:
[104:47] And that's the end of the movie.

Speaker 9:
[104:48] Wow.

Speaker 5:
[104:50] They were ready for more.

Speaker 9:
[104:52] Yeah. And they got them.

Speaker 4:
[104:56] Yeah. I'm honestly, I'm pretty curious. I think it'll be fun going into Zack Craigers' version because I think he will do something completely different. But it's fun knowing the lore and I love Mila.

Speaker 5:
[105:20] I love her love story.

Speaker 4:
[105:23] I love to know that she was like working with her husband and love of her life on these movies.

Speaker 5:
[105:28] That's who like took all of the gratuitous unnecessary nudity out for her.

Speaker 10:
[105:32] Yeah.

Speaker 5:
[105:34] We love that.

Speaker 10:
[105:35] Oh yeah.

Speaker 4:
[105:37] You know, hopefully Marilyn Manson wasn't involved with all of them.

Speaker 5:
[105:40] Paid a bunch, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[105:43] Yeah. But I had fun. I also had fun. I think that we should return to this franchise again someday. Obviously, we'll be doing Craigers, but maybe we'll fit another one or two of these in the meantime. I'd be down. I actually have no idea how many there are, but it feels like a lot.

Speaker 5:
[106:04] I feel like there's a lot, yeah.

Speaker 4:
[106:06] Yeah. So stay tuned. We'll see what Alice gets up to. I feel like the next one is going to be all in Raccoon City. So maybe we'll find out more about why it's called that.

Speaker 5:
[106:17] I can't wait to find out why it's called that.

Speaker 4:
[106:21] Why did you say it?

Speaker 5:
[106:21] Raccoon City.

Speaker 4:
[106:24] Resident Evil 2, Raccoon City. I don't know why they didn't put that in the title. I feel like I would have gone and seen it.

Speaker 6:
[106:32] I would have been like, what's going on with Resident Evil 2, Raccoon City?

Speaker 5:
[106:36] We need to be using that as a marketing tactic.

Speaker 4:
[106:40] I think that should have been a bigger focus. Anywho, I love you, Emily. I love you so much.

Speaker 5:
[106:48] I love you so much.

Speaker 4:
[106:51] We love you listeners. We hope you enjoyed this one.

Speaker 2:
[106:57] We really hope you did.

Speaker 8:
[106:59] I shall do a little dance.

Speaker 4:
[107:02] Just so you guys know, I used to be a little British girl. I had a British accent until I was six.

Speaker 5:
[107:08] It's really important. It's really important that you all know that.

Speaker 4:
[107:11] It's important that you all know that.

Speaker 5:
[107:12] I used to be a little British girl. But you really did.

Speaker 7:
[107:16] You did used to be a little British girl.

Speaker 4:
[107:18] It's just so crazy that I can't do a British accent anymore, because it used to literally be my accent.

Speaker 5:
[107:24] I know. It's devastating for all of us, honestly.

Speaker 4:
[107:26] It's really sad, but here we go. From all of us here at Too Scary Didn't Watch.

Speaker 5:
[107:34] That was perfect.

Speaker 10:
[107:36] Goodbye.

Speaker 5:
[107:39] We did it. We made it. Thank you all for listening to another episode of Too Scary Didn't Watch.

Speaker 10:
[107:45] If you enjoy the show, please remember to subscribe and rate us on Spotify and Apple Podcasts. Five stars only or we will haunt you.

Speaker 4:
[107:52] And if you simply can't get enough of us, we have good news for you. We have lots of bonus content available on our Patreon at patreon.com/tsdwpodcast.

Speaker 5:
[108:02] You'll get access to video trailer reactions, two bonus episodes a month, the power to vote for upcoming episodes and more.

Speaker 10:
[108:09] And last but not least, you can follow us on social media at TSDW Podcast.

Speaker 4:
[108:13] We'll be back next week with a new episode.

Speaker 7:
[108:16] We love you.

Speaker 11:
[108:24] Hi, I am Mandy Moore.

Speaker 1:
[108:26] Sterling K. Brown.

Speaker 3:
[108:27] And I'm Chris Sullivan.

Speaker 1:
[108:28] And we host the podcast That Was Us, now on Headgum.

Speaker 11:
[108:32] Each episode, we're gonna go into a deep dive from our show This Is Us. We're gonna go episode by episode. We're also gonna pepper in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors.

Speaker 1:
[108:45] Are we gonna cry? Yes. A little bit. Are we gonna laugh? A lot.

Speaker 11:
[108:48] A whole lot.

Speaker 1:
[108:49] That's what I'm hoping, man. Listen to That Was Us on your favorite podcast app or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify. New episodes every Tuesday.